$50 Bucks...For A Christmas Tree!!
Welcome back or simply welcome. Our story today, comes from the same entertaining co worker who gave us 'The Rabbit Story.' In today's installment he goes to get a christmas tree....and attempts to bring it home.
When the kids were little (all his stories start that way), we decide one night to go to the Christmas Tree Farm and chop one down ourselves. After hours in the buck cold night they finally picked one out ...$50 for this tree and I have to chop it down myself. $50 bucks for this tree! So, we dragged it to the car and I soon realized we had nothing to hold it down on the top of the wagon (station wagon) so I opened up the back put the seats down and start shoving this thing into the back of the car ( visualize his gestering of this). Well, no matter how much I pushed that thing wasn't going to fit. So I pulled it out - broken limbs and we put it on top of the car and there was some rope and a couple bungy cords and the jumper cables
So the kid and I hoisted it up there and strapped it down with what little rope (off into the distance you can hear cries of laughter) the bundgy cord AND the jumper cables. This meant we had to drive with the window's open because the roped went all the way around it through the car.
It was night and we live out in the country and there was nothing but snowed farm fields and the unlit country road and so, I was driving maybe 70 mph (not that I was thinking something could happen to this tree). Stuff is blowing around and the kid's hat flew out the window. Suddenly, he says, we hear a snap and I look in my side mirror and there was the tree off the car and in mid air just as a semi-tractor trailer came whizzing by and the tree went splat right into his front grill and he carried that thing ALL the way back a mile to the stop signs and when he stopped the tree fell off and then he drove over it. No way I'm leaving it there I paid $50 for it - it was coming home with me!
So we drove back and picked it up (all mangled and broken) and threw it back up on the car and tried to resecure it. We proceeded home, much slower this time, and took it in the house. I swear my wife was going to have a heart attack right there and then. All the branches were broken, grease from the semi, dirty road snow. So, she asks me if I was going out tonight or tomorrow to get a new one. I said, "A NEW ONE I paid 50 bucks for this tree and we're gonna use it".
We couldn't use a tree stand with it so we suspended it from the ceiling with fishing line...one branch at a time. $50 bucks for a Christmas tree mumbles to himself as he walks away and the receptionist and myself are crying from laughing.
Yes, we all meet some real characters out there and like crayons they leave you with a little color of the world at large.
When the kids were little (all his stories start that way), we decide one night to go to the Christmas Tree Farm and chop one down ourselves. After hours in the buck cold night they finally picked one out ...$50 for this tree and I have to chop it down myself. $50 bucks for this tree! So, we dragged it to the car and I soon realized we had nothing to hold it down on the top of the wagon (station wagon) so I opened up the back put the seats down and start shoving this thing into the back of the car ( visualize his gestering of this). Well, no matter how much I pushed that thing wasn't going to fit. So I pulled it out - broken limbs and we put it on top of the car and there was some rope and a couple bungy cords and the jumper cables
So the kid and I hoisted it up there and strapped it down with what little rope (off into the distance you can hear cries of laughter) the bundgy cord AND the jumper cables. This meant we had to drive with the window's open because the roped went all the way around it through the car.
It was night and we live out in the country and there was nothing but snowed farm fields and the unlit country road and so, I was driving maybe 70 mph (not that I was thinking something could happen to this tree). Stuff is blowing around and the kid's hat flew out the window. Suddenly, he says, we hear a snap and I look in my side mirror and there was the tree off the car and in mid air just as a semi-tractor trailer came whizzing by and the tree went splat right into his front grill and he carried that thing ALL the way back a mile to the stop signs and when he stopped the tree fell off and then he drove over it. No way I'm leaving it there I paid $50 for it - it was coming home with me!
So we drove back and picked it up (all mangled and broken) and threw it back up on the car and tried to resecure it. We proceeded home, much slower this time, and took it in the house. I swear my wife was going to have a heart attack right there and then. All the branches were broken, grease from the semi, dirty road snow. So, she asks me if I was going out tonight or tomorrow to get a new one. I said, "A NEW ONE I paid 50 bucks for this tree and we're gonna use it".
We couldn't use a tree stand with it so we suspended it from the ceiling with fishing line...one branch at a time. $50 bucks for a Christmas tree mumbles to himself as he walks away and the receptionist and myself are crying from laughing.
Yes, we all meet some real characters out there and like crayons they leave you with a little color of the world at large.
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Comments
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He's not getting hired by UPS, anytime and any century in the future, Fo Suree!!
Freaking singed rabits and greased up broken Christmas trees.Posted 09-23-2009 at 12:23 PM by alicejb
