Need to move past the bad days too

I feel my last couple of blogs seem to be a little over inflated impressions of myself, so I thought I would post this here and remind myself to keep things in perspective.

I posted this originally on a thread, Dec 13.

Long story but hopefully entertaining.

I had a tough day today. I have a renter in a house out of state. They are 5 months past due as of the 1st. I am having to evict them. If you want to judge me for throwing a family out in Dec, you can get in line behind me. Today was the date where the tenant and I were to meet in front of the judge where she could either pay up, offer an arrangement, or accept that she would have 6 days to find other accommodations.

I left at 5:30 this morning and drove to the courthouse, got in there at 9 on the dot. Sat in there while they ran through all the cases. At 10:45 the judge (actually made the time go by quickly, he was pretty funny with some people), looked up and saw about 7 or 8 of us in the courtroom and said, "I'm out of paperwork! What are you people doing in my court room?" So I go up and show him my receipt stating my court date and time and that I was in the right place. He told me to go back to the civil office and check with them. I'm starting to feel a little frustrated now.

I go to the civil office and patiently wait my turn. I hand the woman my receipt with the case number on it, and she types something on the computer. She looks up at me and the first thing she says is "I wasn't the one you filled this out with". I know at this moment, I just got screwed. On a shelf behind her are 7 or 8 white binders. I'm sure they are operating procedure type of binders, and against them, like a bookend is a bright blue, tupperware container. Big enough to fit a pair of shoes in. Inside the the container looks like three packets of paperwork. Would you believe one of those was mine! It was like hitting the lottery, only not. I was starting to feel a little more frustrated.

It wasn't helping that next to me was a trio of individuals engaged in excited and animated conversation of how a property was stripped of all the furnishings. Do you know the scene in the movie "Me, myself, and Irene", where he hears the loud whistle and the kids start chanting, as he transforms into another personality? SO, there I was.

She explains to me that for what ever reason the paperwork didn't get filed. The constable never served her with paperwork. I would have to come back next week. Man, I was hot...I kept my cool. But I was HOT!!! I got my date set for the 13th. I thanked her, took my paperwork and left. I did ask the lady at the help desk on the way out if I had any recourse due to the incompetence, and she gave me a sweet, southern, "Sorry sugar".

Went out to my car. Sat for a few minutes. I yelled and cursed. Felt sorry for myself. I was so pissed. I finally calmed down a bit and hit the road. I called back to the civil office and asked to speak with a supervisor. Left VM, she called back an hour later. She was very apologetic, but the law states that I have to give the tenant 10 days after being served to come up with the money. Civil court is only held on Fridays, so my court date is now the 20th. Good news is, the court won't throw some one out the week of Christmas, which I have to say, I'm glad they have such a policy.

On the long ride home, I kept feeling flare ups of my anger. Creating checklists of all the ways I feel I get shoe'd in the nuts. Started looking for opportunities to unleash some of my anger. Eventually it happened. Some jackass cut between two semi's and popped out in front of me like 20 feet ahead. OH BOY it was on!!! I shot my hand up in the air and honked the horn. I wanted to go rub his bumper, but I settled with a scowl. HAHAHA Funny how irrational anger jumps like that.

I ended up finally getting home without further incident. Shortly after a friend of mine called and asked if I could give him a ride home. It was his son's birthday, he asked me to stop at a pizza place to pick up some pies. As my buddy was walking in, he opened the door for some kid in his early 20's I'd guess. the wind caught his stack of napkins and blew them all over the place. My buddy picked up a couple, and I watched the kid walk over to the passenger side of his vehicle. I thought we was going to put the pies down and pick up the napkins. How naive can I be? He get's in the car of course. I roll down my passenger window and I yell to the driver, also early 20's, "Hey!" He rolls down his window, "What", he said all puffed up. "You guys gonna leave that litter there?", I asked. "Yeah!, I'm leaving it for you Buddy." and he gave me a thumbs up....

As I'm sure many of you can discern, I was looking for a fight the second I walked out of the courthouse. Up until 25 years ago, I used to fight all the time. Plenty of times I've wanted to since, but I guess I grew up a little. I said a little. Today, these two smug, disrespectful, punks picked the wrong guy to be a smartass with. As he backed up, he was backing right behind my vehicle, I jump out and quickly ran toward them. I heard them laugh at what an ass I am and how bested me with their clever quip. I reached into his window and aggressively tried to grab his collar. He screamed, which surprised me. I wanted him to grab my arm and try to punch me, but instead he punched the gas and ran over a row of bushes. I jumped out of the way and was completely unharmed. I turned around and there is a man with one arm!!

"WOAH!!, You ok man?!", he asked. "yes" I replied, as I pick up the rest of the napkins and get back into my vehicle. Behind me the two guys pull back into view as they are departing the parking area, and my new one armed friend yells several curses at the car....I think they yell back, so he once again counters with some more cursing. I told him it was ok, not worth all the yelling. At the same time, my buddy comes out from picking up the pizzas and wants to know why the one armed man is yelling. I explained to him what had happened, and we have a good laugh that the whole thing happened in about 3 minutes and he was totally oblivious to the whole thing. I wondered later, since I got in and out of my vehicle so fast, if the two guys thought they might have even been assaulted by the one armed man. HAHAHA I sure scared the crap out of them!

I don't condone fighting anymore. I really do practice keeping a hands off approach to other people when I'm on edge. I was a total ass tonight, no doubt. I was very lucky that there was not someone walking in front of his vehicle when he gassed it. I don't like litter bugs. I don't like disrespectful, a holes, and like I said, I was itching for a fight. There were two of them. and I was a jerk! BUT I do feel better than I did!

This day brought me deserved baggage. While the visceral release of anger, sadness, aggression and depression felt great, the after math of how I felt was a big let down. Kind of like a coke high. I know better than that. I cheated myself the opportunity to show some class.