Be aware, if you are trying to adopt a child from China, you might involve in human trafficking (orphanage, children)
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It is really funny when some one says" u haven't been through international adoption, so u have no place to comment on it"
so if i never had a dog, I can't stop some one tortures a dog? If i never wear a fur cloth, I can't not criticized ppl wearing it? it seems like if I wanna make comment on a Refrigerator， I have to learn how to make things cold myself.
I Know nobody would care about chinese's anger, anyway, coz WE CAN'T TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES, so if anybody takes advantage of it, we should be calm and let it be.
I am pretty calm right now. I am too foolish to expect I can get some compassion for these parents and expect some PAP would be more cautious when they try to adopt kids from China. I forget ppl are selfish.
May God always bless America and american will never taste the bitterness of losing their kids systematically.
I totally understand your concern for children who may have been abducted from their families and then more or less extorted in order to get their children back. I cannot imagine such a horrific thing happening in my life; it would be the worst situation possible for a parent to endure.
However, your anger and concern is directed at the wrong folks. People who adopt are doing so with the intention of creating a loving family. It is the policies of the Chinese government that have created this situation.
Families are at risk of being dismantled in China, not b/c of foreigners who have created a market for adoptable children. The Chinese government created the market when they put Draconic measures in place to curb population growth.
The outrage you feel should be directed at the responsible parties, not at Americans/Europeans who wish only to create a home and family for children put in peril b/c of China's punitive birthrate policies.
Of course our hearts break to think of the Guatemala Moms who thought they were putting their kids only temporarily in state care only to return and find them gone. of course our hearts break to think of any parent having their child stolen for whatever purpose.
As you have stated, it is the countrymen who are responsible for this situation. Americans and Europeans might contribute to the demand but it is the Chinese people who are stealing the kids and separating families.
Stilldoll-
Don't you think every adoptive parent wants to think their child is truly an orphan and not the child who was stolen. I look at my own children and wonder. None are from China.
I cannot accept responsibility for the foreign governments who initially instigated these programs, the native people who steal or buy babies or the agencies and facilitators who keep it going. I accept responsibility for my children only at the minute they become my children.
I have worked hard to get the license revoked of the agency we used which proved themselves to be corrupt beyond measure. I worked hard to get the facilitator deported and to get the word out that she is a criminal. When PAP ask me about adoption I try to give as much information as I can. I don't sugarcoat anything. As long as there is money to be made in adoption- or anything for that matter- there will be people willing to bend the rules and make unethical decisions. And there will be families and children who pay the price.
Just try to take some comfort knowing that these children are living happy lives with opportunities they never would have otherwise. That does not right any wrong which may have been made in their native country but don't blame those of us who take these beautiful children in our homes for nothing more than to make or complete a family.
You have a message to spread but there is a better way than blaming the adopters. Try to work within your own country and your countrymen to right the wrongs that may be going on.
I tried to rep you again No Kudzu but have to wait awhile....
Agreed though. The anger should not be at us, the adoptive parents. We only wanted to create a family & adoption was the only way it was going to work for my husband & I.
We did nothing wrong.
It breaks my heart as well to think that there are children, babies out there who were taken from their birth families illegally. Do I believe that my children are some of them?
No.
Our agency, as I stated before, is one of very few that are Hague Accredited. They have dealt with the CCIA since China opened their doors to international adoption in the 90's.
I do not believe for one minute that any of the personnel would be still in proceedings with them if they knew that this was taking place. I believe that if they had any indication that the referrals were coming by corrupt means, they would halt their program immediately.
Yes,there are many agencies, lawyers out there that unfortunately, do not care. They will do business as usual & for those families and children, I feel terrible.
It is not my fault, not my husband's fault, certainly not our children's fault , that any of this is taking place.
To imply otherwise is just completely wrong and offensive.
sorry for my poor english, I am not trying to offend anyone here, I am here to ask for help and please spread the world, some chinese children were taken away forcibly, their parents are desperately looking for them: couples divorced, families broke down, twins separated, mother went psycho, grandparents suicide........All I said here is happening in China right now after children been abducted---it is not script of a movie, it is what someone is being through, bloody life.
I only have one humble hope that PAP will be more cautious when they want to adopt children. I am sure most american are nice ppl, they adopted the right children' but if some one adopted a child from suspicious resource, all I can say is may this person rest in peace.
Cracking down human trafficking is extremely hard, this notorious business has been there for centuries. We need help, need everybody to join this campaign.
Last edited by stilldoll; 05-10-2011 at 12:43 PM..
sorry for my poor english, I am not trying to offend anyone here, I am here to ask for help and please spread the world, some chinese children were taken away forcibly, their parents are desperately looking for them: couples divorced, families broke down, twins separated, mother went psycho, grandparents suicide........All I said here is happening in China right now after children been abducted---it is not script of a movie, it is what someone is being through, bloody life.
I only have one humble hope that PAP will be more cautious when they want to adopt children. I am sure most american are nice ppl, they adopted the right children' but if some one adopted a child from suspicious resource, all I can say is may this person rest in peace.
Cracking down human trafficking is extremely hard, this notorious business has been there for centuries. We need help, need everybody to join this campaign.
Absolutely - human trafficking is heinous and I feel your pain and heartfelt concern for families who are torn apart by these horrible circumstances.
But again - I must say that if you want this situation to stop in China (children abducted and placed in orphanages) then the repressive policies of China's own leaders must stop. They have created an industry, albeit in advertently and they are doing nothing to prevent these abductions from occurring.
The cold hard facts are . . . they don't care. Here in the USA, if a child is abducted, it is a federal offense and the FBI is involved in tracing where that child might be. Their searches are not always effective as covering the tracks when hiding a child (especially a baby!) is not that hard - in any culture.
Until China itself changes their attitude towards their own children, there is not much the rest of us can do to change the situation other than work with accredited agencies.
The situation is one of state policy and the resulting disenfranchisement has become part of China's society (and sadly, economy).
Absolutely - human trafficking is heinous and I feel your pain and heartfelt concern for families who are torn apart by these horrible circumstances.
But again - I must say that if you want this situation to stop in China (children abducted and placed in orphanages) then the repressive policies of China's own leaders must stop. They have created an industry, albeit in advertently and they are doing nothing to prevent these abductions from occurring.
The cold hard facts are . . . they don't care. Here in the USA, if a child is abducted, it is a federal offense and the FBI is involved in tracing where that child might be. Their searches are not always effective as covering the tracks when hiding a child (especially a baby!) is not that hard - in any culture.
Until China itself changes their attitude towards their own children, there is not much the rest of us can do to change the situation other than work with accredited agencies.
The situation is one of state policy and the resulting disenfranchisement has become part of China's society (and sadly, economy).
I agree with you, but.... the Chinese government is considering changing the one child policy currently.
Beijing is considering whether to adopt a two-child policy within the next five years, ending the three-decade-old one-child rule, Chinese media have reported.
Experts have mounted a renewed push for a relaxation of the strict family planning laws at an annual political meeting in the capital, warning that the country's population of 1.3 billion is becoming dangerously unbalanced, with too few adults of working age supporting too many of their elders.
I too thought China was relaxing its one child policy and stopping international adoptions. I know this from experience as we tried to adopt and left it a bit late. The agency I was going through at the time in the UK said that China was strengthing the laws regarding adopting because of the fact that there is not enough females to male ratio making them harder to find potential partners in the future. They told us the Chinese orphanges would only consider us if we were willing to take a child with a disability. This was in 2008.
I am a Chinese too. I find this adoption forum today. I have to disagree with still doll. For sure, there is human trafficking and for sure, there are crimes. And also for sure, there are many many orphans who need homes. Our culture is very cruel to an unwedded mother. Our culture doesn't advocate adoption. Our system doesn't provide any support for these children. If we block international adoption, what will happen to these children? For 0.1% of victim of crime, shall we sacrifice 99.9% of them?
Absolutely - human trafficking is heinous and I feel your pain and heartfelt concern for families who are torn apart by these horrible circumstances.
But again - I must say that if you want this situation to stop in China (children abducted and placed in orphanages) then the repressive policies of China's own leaders must stop. They have created an industry, albeit in advertently and they are doing nothing to prevent these abductions from occurring.
The cold hard facts are . . . they don't care. Here in the USA, if a child is abducted, it is a federal offense and the FBI is involved in tracing where that child might be. Their searches are not always effective as covering the tracks when hiding a child (especially a baby!) is not that hard - in any culture.
Until China itself changes their attitude towards their own children, there is not much the rest of us can do to change the situation other than work with accredited agencies.
The situation is one of state policy and the resulting disenfranchisement has become part of China's society (and sadly, economy).
I understand everything you are saying, but at the same time an industry can not develop unless there is a demand. If people adopt from China or any other country without awareness of what crimes may be involved, do they not have some responsibility? Do they not have the responsibility on their side to research thoroughly where their adoptive child is coming from, and to avoid as best they possibly can supporting trafficking?
If foreigners refused to adopt unless China had tighter regulations, would it have any affect? That's an honest question...I don't know. But as much as people may wish to adopt from the goodness of their hearts, if in doing so they rescue one child and expose many others to danger or abuse...they do in my opinion have some responsibility for the fate of the other children, or the parents whose lives were torn apart.
There is this myth in international adoption that there is a shortage of children in orphanages so the Chinese government must "steal" babies in order to make a profit from those rich American adoptive parents. It is a lie.
According to the Chinese Children's Welfare Department and UNICEF there were in 2010 712,000 children in Chinese orphanages. In the same year Americans adopted 3401 children from China (873 of which were boys btw). The Chinese government doesn't do much to encourage international adoption and as you can see by the numbers they don't need to steal kids...there are hundreds of thousands of children who will not be adopted.
ETA This isn't saying that I'm anti-adoption regulation. I absolutely am for regulation that allows children to be safely, legally and ethically adopted QUICKLY by families who will love them.
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