U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting > Adoption
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 12-30-2012, 03:39 PM
 
Location: New York State, USA
142 posts, read 212,014 times
Reputation: 173

Advertisements

And doesn't each US State have different laws governing adoption of children?

Wouldn't it be best if we had a uniform Federal law that would balance things out?

For example, Utah routinely ignores the rights of fathers who often doen't know their child is being given up for adoption until it is too late for him, and many pregnant girls and women flock there to give birth and relinquish. But if laws were uniform across the states, it would be a requirement for fathers to be notifed and give their written consent as well. This would avoid the legal hassles of all involed to fight over a child. That's just one example.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 12-30-2012, 05:04 PM
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
18,642 posts, read 23,230,355 times
Reputation: 48804
I have LOADS of outrage over US adoption laws, which is why I have chosen to, and will choose again to adopt internationally.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-30-2012, 05:08 PM
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
18,642 posts, read 23,230,355 times
Reputation: 48804
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dopo View Post
Outrage over Russia's adoption ban...
Where's the outrage over US adoption laws?

The news media loves to point the finger at other countries
Personally, I really don't give a ..... about any law passed in Russia.
But why is it that the news media in the US doesn't point the finger to American adoption system that forces Americans to adopt kids from other countries?

Not caring about Russia is one thing. I care about it's children, as I do about children everywhere.

I feel no particular burden to adopt American children because I am a US citizen.

By the way, I disagree so vehemently with many US adoption laws that we, and other American parents decide each year to adopt outside of the US.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-30-2012, 05:32 PM
 
1,879 posts, read 1,862,122 times
Reputation: 1462
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnonymouseX View Post
That is still force. Making it so difficult that one can not adopt in America and therefore have to go elsewhere is for all intents and purposes equates to being forced...

You at arguing semantics but its a false argument.

If you block left and I have to go right you have forced me. You can't say well you didn't have to go right you could stay still.

That's nonsense....
How much easier can the US make it? No place is easier in the world to adopt domestically than the US.

Perhaps we should go back to the "good old days" of the 50s-70s eh? Never fear, the NCFA are here, doing their best to increase supply with their "counselling programs".

If you are talking about foster care etc, then that is a separate issue in itself. There is evidence to indicate that programs designed at preventing children from ending up in foster care in the first place are far more successful than trying to sort things out once they have ended up in foster care. These preventive programs also make it easier to terminate the rights of truly abusive parents and thus making adoption swifter for those children who truly need it.

Last edited by susankate; 12-30-2012 at 05:50 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-30-2012, 05:40 PM
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
18,642 posts, read 23,230,355 times
Reputation: 48804
Quote:
Originally Posted by hml1976 View Post
Perhaps the media and Americans in general are outraged at 800,000 children (a low estimate) living in institutions in Russia? You may not give a .... about them but many of us do. Most of those children would never wind up adopted by an American family, but a few would have. I invite you to read Dr. Jane Aronson's op-Ed in yesterday's Washington Post for an idea of what conditions in Russian orphanages are like.

As for adopting domestically vs internationally, well both are difficult and often with good reason. Until you have faced that decision for yourself and really researched the reasons why people choose one or the other...well then it is difficult to have an opinion that is well informed. You may feel in a vague way that things should work one way but very few outside the adoption community have truly researched why the processes work the way that they do. I can share our family's story. I had a friend who adopted toddler twins from Russia, had a good experience so we called up their agency and went with them, although to a different country. It wasn't more complicated than that and I think you would find that our experience is not unusual.
No adoption is "easy". And as the above poster wrote, I am outraged that these children are being held as political hostages when many families want to adopt them. Unfortunately, few live in Russia. I don't think the Russian government cares about these children. They want them to just "go away". Just not to US families.

There are reasons why people chose to adopt internationally and domestically. One thing that never entered into my mind was the need, or the responsibility; on my part to adopt from my own country.
After that, we examined other issues.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-30-2012, 11:21 PM
 
1,286 posts, read 2,971,089 times
Reputation: 2277
We chose to adopt here in the US partly because it was easier and faster. Six months from signing on with our attorney to having our baby boy.

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnonymouseX View Post
It's a very long and difficult process to adopt in America.

That's why people go overseas. Much easier...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-31-2012, 12:49 AM
 
Location: Liberal Coast
4,277 posts, read 5,167,111 times
Reputation: 3889
Quote:
Originally Posted by taulery View Post
And doesn't each US State have different laws governing adoption of children?

Wouldn't it be best if we had a uniform Federal law that would balance things out?

For example, Utah routinely ignores the rights of fathers who often doen't know their child is being given up for adoption until it is too late for him, and many pregnant girls and women flock there to give birth and relinquish. But if laws were uniform across the states, it would be a requirement for fathers to be notifed and give their written consent as well. This would avoid the legal hassles of all involed to fight over a child. That's just one example.
Last time I checked, the Constitution didn't give the federal government the right to govern adoption.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-31-2012, 12:51 AM
 
Location: Liberal Coast
4,277 posts, read 5,167,111 times
Reputation: 3889
Quote:
Originally Posted by atina33 View Post
We chose to adopt here in the US partly because it was easier and faster. Six months from signing on with our attorney to having our baby boy.
Our international adoption will most likely take about seven or eight months.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-31-2012, 12:57 AM
 
1,879 posts, read 1,862,122 times
Reputation: 1462
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnonymouseX View Post
It's a very long and difficult process to adopt in America.

That's why people go overseas. Much easier...
Do you mean the actual legal process or do you mean the actual length of time it takes to "find a child".

Are you talking domestic infant adoption or foster care adoption?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-31-2012, 01:00 AM
 
1,879 posts, read 1,862,122 times
Reputation: 1462
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnonymouseX View Post
That is still force. Making it so difficult that one can not adopt in America and therefore have to go elsewhere is for all intents and purposes equates to being forced...

You at arguing semantics but its a false argument.

If you block left and I have to go right you have forced me. You can't say well you didn't have to go right you could stay still.

That's nonsense....
Like Dark, I'd like to know in what ways you felt you were "blocked" from adopting domestically. Please enlighten us.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting > Adoption
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top