International Adoption (Best options for US single women) (parents, orphanage, children)
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I am interested in adopting a child from Asia or the Pacific islands.
Which countries (typically) have the smoothest, most trustworthy adoption systems and allow single US women (age 30+) to adopt?
( I was especially interested in the Philippines, Thailand and India. )
Note: I am a single woman in my thirties with a steady job and more than able to (financially, physically and emotionally) provide for a child. ( I have been setting aside savings since I was 18 yrs old when I discovered I was infertile.)
I am interested in adopting one child (gender is irrelevant) between the ages of infant to about 6 yrs old. ( I would not be able to accommodate a special needs child.)
*Safety* is also a factor in selecting which specific country to adopt from, as I would have to travel there and spend some time to bond with my child before hand.
Any US single women who have an adopted from any of these regions, please feel free to share your personal thoughts & experiences.
( I realize some countries are not open to singles adopting or frown upon it.)
I would greatly appreciate your honesty & insight. Thank you!
I'm glad you're interested in adoption, and hope things work well for you.
However, please realize that many countries label kids as "special needs" when they have very minor, often quite correctable or effectively treatable disorders, such as crossed eyes, cleft lip/cleft palate, clubfoot, very mild CP, HIV (which now can be treated very easily with a few pills once or twice a day - children receiving this treatment have a normal lifespan), nearsightedness, and so on.
Many of these children are cognitively typical, with only "orphanage delays", which can be overcome. Sadly, they have little future in many of their native countries, many of which view physical special needs as an indication that the individual is of no use to society, hence of no value whatsoever. Until long-engrained notions like this can be overcome in country, the best hope for such children is international adoption by loving parents.
If you are open to such minor, treatable issues, you will have a far greater number of children available to you, especially as you are interested in younger children, and are likely to find your child much more rapidly.
There are many more boys awaiting adoption than there are girls, generally speaking.
I would also be aware that any child adopted from an orphanage system over 12-18mths old is going to have some needs outside of the norm, most may be fixable, but some may not.
If you are truly not prepared for any kind of special need I would hesitate to recommend having a child frankly. We adopted our children from Central Asia as healthy infants. Our son developed Tourette's syndrome at age 7. It's a special need but pretty easy to deal with but there's no way obviously that we would have known at 6mths old that this would happen (and it wouldn't have mattered to us anyway). Anyway my point is that especially as a single parent you need to be prepared for anything with adoption and just with kids in general.
All that said, I think honestly that the US is probably the easiest place to adopt from these days, especially for a single woman. I would research domestic infant and foster adoption since you are open to a slightly older child.
The Philippines only allows singles to adopt children over the age of 6, but it's a pretty smooth and predictable process. India is currently only processing special needs adoptions if you aren't an Indian citizen. Thailand doesn't accept singles. So, with your criteria, none of the countries you listed will work. You can do China as a single if you adopt a special focus child, and some of those children (particularly boys) have extremely manageable special needs.
Truthfully, if you want a child under six with no special needs, international adoption is probably not for you. However, this will depend on your definition of special needs. Can you not raise a child who is hard of hearing or Deaf? Can you raise a child who needs regular blood transfusions but has no other special needs? Can you raise a child who has a medical condition that has been treated but is still considered to have special needs because of that? If the answer to those questions is no, then I would strongly suggest domestic adoption.
Why Asia? If you are thinking it will be faster, less expensive or smoother nothing could be further from the truth. Have you looked into becoming a foster home and possibly adopting from that? We have 3 adopted children from Asia and believe me they were not cheap, smooth sailing or quick. I don't know of any country anymore that would allow adoption to a single person , especially for child under age 6. Supply and demand. There are far too many married couples wanting children for countries to even consider singles today.
Why Asia? If you are thinking it will be faster, less expensive or smoother nothing could be further from the truth. Have you looked into becoming a foster home and possibly adopting from that? We have 3 adopted children from Asia and believe me they were not cheap, smooth sailing or quick. I don't know of any country anymore that would allow adoption to a single person , especially for child under age 6. Supply and demand. There are far too many married couples wanting children for countries to even consider singles today.
Asian countries (except South Korea and China) are often cheaper than other countries. India, China, and Hong Kong will accept singles but only for children with special needs.
No Sheena I can't think of any Asian country - really any country- which allows single women to adopt. Guatemala used to as recently as 6 years ago and I think maybe China 10 years back and I was with a single woman in Vietnam in 2002 but I doubt that is still possible. In fact Vietnam has been closed to all Americas for some years and I don't see it opening up again in the foreseeable future. Too much corruption and baby trafficking.
The countries that I know of which allow singles mothers to adopt are Colombia, Bulgaria, Latvia, Armenia, Uganda, China (Special Focus only), Serbia, Ecuador, Haiti, India, Peru, Azerbaijan, Georgia, Moldova, and the Philippines (only children over 6).
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