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Old 05-19-2014, 07:32 AM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
21,846 posts, read 23,076,737 times
Reputation: 37215

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Quote:
Originally Posted by sheena12 View Post

She is not a piece of property.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sheena12 View Post
It seems that some people, including this judge; stubbornly ascribe to the antiquated "children as property"


Quote:
Originally Posted by sheena12 View Post

He can go out and impregnate other women, if he desires children so much.
Now who is treating children like property?

If you lost one of your children would you be comforted by someone telling you to just go out and have/get another one? Like replacing a pair of shoes??
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Old 05-19-2014, 07:32 AM
 
1,879 posts, read 1,856,092 times
Reputation: 1462
Quote:
Originally Posted by markg91359 View Post
I don't have time to analyze this decision in detail.

One thing I did note though is that the biological father apparently had a record of committing felonies before he committed the felony of transporting guns across state lines.

A marginal father indeed. The law says that people who serve "only" 7 and 1/2 years in prison get to remain parents--even if some of us think its a bad law.

Honestly, if this clown really cared about his daughter, he would have signed over parental rights and let this couple who had provided her with the only real home she had ever known do so.

Once again, biology trumps about every other value in life.

I wonder how long he will stay out of jail now.
You might like to read the actual timeline which is the reason I posted it.

Note also that the adoption was vacated 5 years ago.

Note also that the grandmother was approved for placement (as noted by hopes) - if one reads the article in my previous article, you will note that there is nothing wrong with her credentials. She took on her 9 grandnieces/nephews when their mother died.

Based on the facts provided in the decision, the judge in 2009 really had no choice but to vacate the adoption.
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Old 05-19-2014, 08:28 AM
 
13,140 posts, read 20,709,679 times
Reputation: 35314
Quote:
Originally Posted by susankate View Post
You might like to read the actual timeline which is the reason I posted it.

Note also that the adoption was vacated 5 years ago.

Note also that the grandmother was approved for placement (as noted by hopes) - if one reads the article in my previous article, you will note that there is nothing wrong with her credentials. She took on her 9 grandnieces/nephews when their mother died.

Based on the facts provided in the decision, the judge in 2009 really had no choice but to vacate the adoption.
Great links, thank you. I see the father is working, and the child was "student of the month" recently. I wish them the best, as we all should.
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Old 05-19-2014, 08:31 AM
 
Location: Texas
1,029 posts, read 1,212,522 times
Reputation: 1985
The father made some bad choices - but he was apparently a decent parent.

He was going to jail, and he should have had the right to say who would raise his daughter. If his mother, who was approved by social services, had gotten custody, chances are he would have been able to have ongoing contact with his daughter. He would have had some say in how she was raised. He would have had more information about what was going on with her life. Sonya would have had more contact with her biological family. She would not have had to be completely uprooted.

According to this article, the father made an agreement with DCS not to speak about Sonya publicly after she moved to Nebraska, so he is unable to address the public outpour from the adoptive parents.

The adoptive parents fought for 5 years to keep her away from her biological family. They knew he wanted custody. they knew he had a decent chance of winning. Yet they still refused to allow her to get to know him. They had options to help ease the transition, and they refused.

They are fighting like crazy to keep her - just as he has been fighting like crazy for YEARS to get her back. I'm horribly disappointed in those who are saying that he only wants her because he can get more money from the government if he has a kid. Do you have any proof at all for those allegations, or does it just make it easier to sympathize with the adoptive parents if you can vilify him?
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Old 05-19-2014, 09:15 AM
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
18,586 posts, read 23,131,512 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by danielj72 View Post
One thing that has not been brought up is how this kid will react to being forced to do something against her will. She has lost the only family she knows, lost all her friends and now lives in an alien part of the country. A nine year old is capable of having a strong opinion and if she hates this man for this he will never be able to control her. I know I have read cases of children who end up on the wrong end of a custody battle and run away to return to the place they want to be. Why would this man want this kind of conflict in his life??? Yes he may have been wronged, but the right way to approach this would have been to fight for the right to have visitation and contact, allowing him to build a father daughter relationship. That could have lead to her wanting to be with her bio family in time. THe way things were done he has set up a situation were resentment will linger for years and that may only get worse over time. She will grow older, more mature and she will become more sophisticated in her rebellion against him. In the end he may lose this as the little girl could wage a years long campaign of defiance against him that will make his life miserable. I have known people who were wronged in their childhood by parents, and often they never forgive and they absolutely never forget it.

She is already eleven, hardly a baby.

If this man had any love for this girl, he would not snatch her away from her parents.

It's cruel.
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Old 05-19-2014, 09:26 AM
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
18,586 posts, read 23,131,512 times
Reputation: 48552
Quote:
Originally Posted by markg91359 View Post
I don't have time to analyze this decision in detail.

One thing I did note though is that the biological father apparently had a record of committing felonies before he committed the felony of transporting guns across state lines.

A marginal father indeed. The law says that people who serve "only" 7 and 1/2 years in prison get to remain parents--even if some of us think its a bad law.

Honestly, if this clown really cared about his daughter, he would have signed over parental rights and let this couple who had provided her with the only real home she had ever known do so.

Once again, biology trumps about every other value in life.

I wonder how long he will stay out of jail now.

A marginal father who would not pass a home study.

Transporting guns across state lines. Not exactly a traffic infraction.

Statistically, he will continue to have run ins with the law.
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Old 05-19-2014, 09:45 AM
 
9,140 posts, read 9,222,378 times
Reputation: 28628
Quote:
Originally Posted by sheena12 View Post
A marginal father who would not pass a home study.

Transporting guns across state lines. Not exactly a traffic infraction.

Statistically, he will continue to have run ins with the law.
Transporting guns was apparently not his first felony. There is more to that story and I wonder what it was. Transporting guns to help someone commit a violent crime? Selling guns to someone he knew was engaged in a criminal activity? Involvement in drugs?

I guess it really takes a lot to convince most people that someone should not be a parent.

I can analyze this situation and find fault on the part of a lot people who were involved here including the adoptive parents.

I have to accept what the law is in this situation. A person who really cared about the welfare of their child though would not have disrupted the only home this girl has ever really known. That speaks to me almost as much as this man's lengthy criminal history.
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Old 05-19-2014, 10:09 AM
 
Location: Texas
1,029 posts, read 1,212,522 times
Reputation: 1985
Sheena12, the father did pass a home study, or he wouldn't have been allowed to get the child. DCS did their due diligence to make sure she would be safe, and from the most recent reports, it sounds as if she is thriving there.

OF COURSE she misses her adoptive parents. I hope she has the opportunity to continue to talk to them.

She's also only 9 - not sure where you keep getting 11.
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Old 05-19-2014, 10:12 AM
 
Location: Texas
1,029 posts, read 1,212,522 times
Reputation: 1985
You can turn it around, too. If the adoptive parents had any love for the child, why did they keep her from her family?

The father made it clear he wanted the child back, and they refused. The grandmother was there and approved as a caregiver by the time the father went to jail. Yet the adoptive parents refused to give the child up.

From jail, the father made it clear he wanted his child. The adoptive parents refused to give her back.

The father continued to fight for custody. The adoptive parents refused to give her back.

The judge ordered the adoptive parents to take certain measures to help the child adjust to a potential transition. The adoptive parents did not comply.

Did the adoptive parents really care about the child's best interests? It doesn't seem like it to me.
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Old 05-19-2014, 10:49 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 92,025,684 times
Reputation: 30379
Quote:
Originally Posted by markg91359 View Post
Honestly, if this clown really cared about his daughter, he would have signed over parental rights and let this couple who had provided her with the only real home she had ever known do so.
Why would he sign over parental rights to people who stole his child? He readily signed over parental rights of his other children to the grandmother. He wanted to do the same with this child too. She missed growing up with 7 siblings because of that the kidnappers did.
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