Child Adoption is for the rich! (foster parents, infant, birth, options)

[CraigCreek]

If you're open to special needs international adoption, Reece's Rainbow can help with fundraising as well as walking you through the procedure. Over 1,700 kids from around 25 countries have found loving families with the help of RR, which is a non-profit adoption ministry, not an adoption agency. All of the kids listed with RR have special needs, many with Down syndrome, but "other angels" are listed as well. Some of the special needs are quite mild, while others are more significant.

Russia is currently closed to adoption by Americans. Each country has its own requirements as to parental age, marital status, age of children available for international adoption, rules about sibling groups and so on. Again, RR is very helpful in matching would-be adoptive families to the countries they best "match".

[ClaraC]

OP, I'm very very surprised that an African American woman can't adopt a child from foster care in Los Angeles, at the age of 5. I feel like you're just getting the run around and the Foster Care system is miscommunicating how to do it.

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by Nattering Heights

That's bureaucracy. Give it a few more years to die. Neighbors dying of flu, malnutrition, wars, etc. will provide plenty of local orphans.

Um, what? I don't perceive California will be in dire straits in the next couple years.

[charolastra00]

Originally Posted by MLSFan

if you can't afford adoption fees, it would be hard raising a kid... they aren't cheap either

My brother and SIL had a very difficult delivery that required a long time in the hospital and extra appointments from mom and baby after birth. In the 9 months of pregnancy and almost 2 years since birth, my niece has cost less money than I would expect to need to pay to adopt- that includes hospital & doctor's fees, baby furniture and clothing, AND daycare. All of that would be things I would need to pay for if I adopted on top of adoption fees.

Keep in mind that if I got pregnant tomorrow, I would only have to pay between $500-$1000 for medical copays while adoption would cost $30-50K.

Someone's difficulty affording up front adoption fees has nothing to do with their ability to afford to care for a child.

[SparklesNShine]

Originally Posted by charolastra00

My brother and SIL had a very difficult delivery that required a long time in the hospital and extra appointments from mom and baby after birth. In the 9 months of pregnancy and almost 2 years since birth, my niece has cost less money than I would expect to need to pay to adopt- that includes hospital & doctor's fees, baby furniture and clothing, AND daycare. All of that would be things I would need to pay for if I adopted on top of adoption fees.

Keep in mind that if I got pregnant tomorrow, I would only have to pay between $500-$1000 for medical copays while adoption would cost $30-50K.

Someone's difficulty affording up front adoption fees has nothing to do with their ability to afford to care for a child.

I agree. If there was a law mandating every couple have 50k in the bank before conceiving the population would dwindle to nothing.

[nmnita]

Originally Posted by MLSFan

if you can't afford adoption fees, it would be hard raising a kid... they aren't cheap either

I am sorry but I don't agree with you. Oh I agree the cost of raising children is out of sight but parents can be great parents and still not be able to come up with $30,000 all at once. Many people do not have that much money hidden or available anywhere and can still have the means to support their children.

OP, I feel for you, how about the county bureau of adoptions in Los Angeles or, as suggested try going through an international adoption. I do not understand how, or why adopting should be so expensive. OK, re-Read your message and see you are actually have worked with the county of Los Angeles.

[nmnita]

Originally Posted by MS313

I didn't know adoption was so complicated and expensive. I thought they needed more people to adopt children. I guess everything is "profit first" now days.

I agree it is a shock to understand the costs, but as for people wanting to adopt and a need, it is quite the opposite. There are not nearly enough babies available. Oh, there are always older kids, but they often come with a lot of baggage. There are children with special needs, this is not something an adoptive family should take lightly and there are inter racial or minorities children, but again, this isn't for everyone. What I am having a problem with is, no compensation for the mother who is giving her child up and yet there are thousands of $$s being collected for someone's profit.

[Sassybluesy]

Originally Posted by Nattering Heights

That's bureaucracy. Give it a few more years to die. Neighbors dying of flu, malnutrition, wars, etc. will provide plenty of local orphans.

And sadly...supply and demand.


There just aren't that many USA babies available for adoption for one reason or another. Often, the birth parents don't relinquish their parental rights, and so babies are in foster limbo.


And then, you have countries incredibly over populated, and thus the adoption is less expensive.

[Sassybluesy]

Originally Posted by nmnita

I agree it is a shock to understand the costs, but as for people wanting to adopt and a need, it is quite the opposite. There are not nearly enough babies available. Oh, there are always older kids, but they often come with a lot of baggage. There are children with special needs, this is not something an adoptive family should take lightly and there are inter racial or minorities children, but again, this isn't for everyone. What I am having a problem with is, no compensation for the mother who is giving her child up and yet there are thousands of $$s being collected for someone's profit.

Usually, the mother's medical costs are usually covered. Either by the adoptive parents or the agency. Otherwise, you're talking about baby selling.

[Middletwin]

Originally Posted by otaey1

Yes. I’m here to vent. I want to adopt a child under the age of 5 but just can’t afford it. I called 10 adoption agencies (in & out of state) to find out the initial cost is 30,000. Average adoption cost is about 35,000.00 I’m a teacher and definitely can’t afford those fees. To make matter worse the birth mother gets no monetary reimbursement. The agency or attorney gets it all. It’s a shame I have a willing heart but $$ rules the system. Yes I have tried the foster care route. I had a new born that they told me is highly likely adoptable because the baby has also has a sibling that has been in foster care over a year. I was willing to take them both but the foster agency only gave me the baby. I took maternity leave to love, bond and take care of this sweet little baby. After 3 months I got a call saying the Judge had released the child and to have her ready within an hour to picked up by the social worker. The child was released to live in a special drug rehab program that allows its participants to bring their children. I didn’t know that type of program exited. Since then every child the foster agency has called me for is non adoptable. I just find it hard to believe that in the whole county of Los Angeles (Detroit born and raised) there is no children whose parental rights have been relinquished. Others have told me that there are many children in the system that need to be adopted but the social workers aren't able to keep up with their large caseloads to look for people who are willing to adopt the kids. So if people are wandering why many middle class African American’s like myself don’t adopt this is the reason. The system is so corrupt.

Please remember when in distress and angst over the loss of the baby: It should be joy for the little one whose parent is getting well, so the family can remain intact. This is how it's supposed to work. Those early infant years are extremely important, as most of us know now. And you made a difference. Your loss is still a loss though, made traumatic since you were blindsided. Generally, it's understood that minorities who historically experienced white-washing and or slavery in their family lineage, that giving their family members through adoption is not entertained. If you are allowed or welcomed, it'd be nice if you could mentor the parent somehow.