Bethany Christian Services' Controversial New Appeal: Factor Race Into Adoption (birth, options)
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There's a federal law on the books that prohibits race from being a factor in an adoption. This Multi-Ethnic Placement Act (MEPA) is intended to remove barriers to adopting children of color.
Bethany Christian Services says the law needs to change. The agency believes the law limits the proper education of parents before a trans-racial adoption. That's because, under MEPA, all adoptions must be treated the same, whether white parents are adopting white children or children of color.
I'm in favor of more education and support for parents adopting children of different races.
My sister has--not regrets about adopting a child of a different race from herself and her husband, but regrets about how they handled it. She honestly "never thought about" the fact that he looked different from her, or that he was being raised by a family who didn't look like him in a city where almost no one looked like him. She believed that if she treated him just like he was her biological child, he wouldn't think about those things either.
It didn't work out that way. I'm not saying that all of his attachment and other issues stem from his being a different race, but some of them do. I don't see how on earth educating adoptive parents about potential difficulties involved in adopting a child of a different race can be a bad thing. If it's a "barrier," well, there are a lot of barriers to adoption that are a lot more senseless than this (i.e. a mandate to pre-install a locked box in your refrigerator just in case your adopted child someday needs to take a medication that has to be kept refrigerated. I have three biological children and never once felt I needed to lock up medicine.)
I see this as another way adoption agencies control who adopts. There are a large number of couples that would like to adopt, but the agencies does NOT want to sign off. They continue to prefer long term foster care as a permanency solution over adoption.
Agencies insist that it's in the child's best interest to remain in their local community where they experienced abuse/neglect. As a result very few foster adoptions happen across state line. Agencies/social workers insist they need to rate hopeful adoptive couples as to how culturally sensitive they are or rate communities for their number of cultural mirrors/resources. Lastly, there is a fundamental conflict of interest in the foster care system. Their funding is directly tied to the number of children in care. More children in care, the more social workers, group homes, etc. they can fund via their budgeting process.
I see this as another way adoption agencies control who adopts. There are a large number of couples that would like to adopt, but the agencies does NOT want to sign off. They continue to prefer long term foster care as a permanency solution over adoption.
In my (vicarious) experience, this is true, but the main reason foster children are not adopted is that the courts refuse to terminate parental rights. The deadbeat, abusive, addicted parents are given chance after chance to "clean up" and "shape up" while their kids stay in foster care permanently. As you said, it's all about the money.
I do have friends whose whose two foster children (siblings) were removed from them and given to another family. These little girls' brother was also taken from his previous foster and given to the third family. My friends had offered to take the boy as well, but they were denied. The reason given was that it was better for the group to be adopted by a family who was "new" to all three of them. My friends suspect that part of the reason they were denied is that they are Asian but the kids are white. But at least, they actually were all adopted.
In my (vicarious) experience, this is true, but the main reason foster children are not adopted is that the courts refuse to terminate parental rights. The deadbeat, abusive, addicted parents are given chance after chance to "clean up" and "shape up" while their kids stay in foster care permanently. As you said, it's all about the money.
My husband and I adopted 11 years ago and found this to be 100% truth. After many, many court visits and the US Marshals finally tracking down the birth mom because she was wanted for assault, her parental rights were terminated but it wasn't as clear cut as we assumed. The courts kept giving the birth mom chance after chance to "clean up" and become the ideal parent they assumed she could be. She has 15 other biological children and doesn't care for any of them as they are all in the custody of other family members so our attitude was, why would she become a good parent and care for this child when she hasn't been there for the others.
It was a long hard road but we persevered and were finally able to adopt, but the way the system is set up (at least in Louisiana) favors the birth parents no matter how unfit they are. And we still don't know who the birth dad is although he had a court appointed attorney representing him if he ever came forward. Talk about some tense days in court.
In Texas bio parents have one year to get their act together at which point they can lose rights or get granted a six month extension. It is difficult to get a second extension. Of course their is the random case that doesn't follow the rule.
In Texas bio parents have one year to get their act together at which point they can lose rights or get granted a six month extension. It is difficult to get a second extension. Of course their is the random case that doesn't follow the rule.
How often do you think they get a six month extension? What can be done to ensure that Texas follows federal law. The courts already found them in contempt twice.
From the brief that the court released, permanency is still not being met for a large number of children and hundreds of children are dying in care during the five year period the report covers
I will say that there's also a federal law--the Indian Child Welfare Act (ICWA)--that explicitly allows the consideration of race in some adoption and placement cases.
I have NOTHING good to say about Betheny "Christians" Services. Over prices, unkind to clients and prospective clients, and on the wrong side of every Social Issue concerning children. They were trafficking in children of parents detained and imprisoned at the boarder. They have done so many things that skirt the law, that I am amazed that they are still open.
OK. Now that I had my little rant, I do think that race should not be ignored by people adopting transracially. There will be issues that arise during your child's life, It's inevitable.
I believe in transracial adoption, but I also believe in some sort of sensitivity training. It;s been 25 years since we have adopted my daughter from Korea. I have seen so much ignorance on the part of some adoptive parents, it astounds me. Our agency had online courses, and in person classes. We all adopted as a cohort, and keep in touch to this day.
I have heard parents who are darker complected whites say that their children, for example, looked Italian because they had long dark hair. WTH> Your child is just not the same ethnicity as you. Get over it.
Im truth, children adopted transracially will never be exactly like others of their race, and will have some traits of both cultures. The same goes for children adopted from Eastern Europe.
The hardest thing for me, was the rejection my daughter received from many non-adopted Korean Americans.
There is nothing wrong with discussing race or being aware of it. I just don't like Bethany at all. Whatever they do is usually for the wrong reasons and motivations.
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