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Old 09-18-2012, 03:58 PM
 
Location: West Coast
1,199 posts, read 2,195,811 times
Reputation: 2098

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Quote:
Originally Posted by nyanna View Post
darkskin, round nose, black kinky hair, dark brown eyes, and medium full lips. I am not mixed. that is the only way I know how to describe myself. According to the men in this thread, I am far from the standard of beauty that most men find attractive.
Lets see, given that most women with your beautiful features live in countries where Blacks make up the majority population, I would say that men from African and Caribbean countries would find your features as the standard. There is an entire continent full of these men. There are many many islands full of these men. Many also reside in the U.S., and in other parts of the world. I just look at things from a global perspective.

 
Old 09-18-2012, 04:02 PM
 
Location: Midwest
2,975 posts, read 4,440,569 times
Reputation: 1947
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joy74 View Post
Lets see, given that most women with your beautiful features live in countries where Blacks make up the majority population, I would say that men from African and Caribbean countries would find your features as the standard. There is an entire continent full of these men. There are many many islands full of these men. Many also reside in the U.S., and in other parts of the world. I just look at things from a global perspective.
I don't want to date African or Carribean men. Most of the men I am around are African American or White American. so what good is that going to do me?
 
Old 09-18-2012, 04:05 PM
 
578 posts, read 889,776 times
Reputation: 650
Quote:
Originally Posted by CSD610 View Post
Read some of the other threads and posts you will see for yourself it is a CHOICE that remains because of the refusal to seek therapy to correct the issue because everyone ELSE has the problem NOT them.
The poster I an referring to appears to he a child - have a heart
 
Old 09-18-2012, 11:41 PM
 
195 posts, read 560,032 times
Reputation: 326
Quote:
Originally Posted by nyanna View Post
Yes, their opinions greatly affect my self esteem. Most guys want women who are as close to the ideal as possible. and yes I do feel my looks are preventing me from being happy and meeting someone who wants a relationship with me
They shouldn't.

You can't go around life being obsessed with what other people think about you.

You've got to develop a thicker skin and realize that there's over a billion Black people in the world.

We're in Africa, America, South America, etc. . . , so somebody must like the way we look.

I grew up in a Black city and saw dark skinned girls with guys all the time. It's not like all the Black guys had like light-skinned, Latina, or White girlfriends or something.

Black people mate with each other all the time, so if there's people out there who don't want you, it must be because of something you're doing, or you may just need to move to somewhere that has more Black people.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stickytoffee View Post
I understand. If you don't look like what guys consider "attractive" it ain't happening. Most men are influenced by the "white female beauty standard" and the closer you are to that, the more physically attractive you are for dating . Asian women and latina women are closer to the standard than black women (straight hair, lighter skin, "softer features"). Next would be mixed and black women who don't look "typical". Of course there are exceptions but maybe these men are harder to find or come in a package you're not attracted to.
What kind of guys do you like? Black?
Wait, I'd like to see evidence of this.

I see dark skinned women with boyfriends or kids(signs that somebody had sex with them) all the time.

Where is this idea that nobody wants Black looking women coming from?

The thing that hurts Black women is being overweight.

Four out of five black women in America are overweight

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/05/06/op...-fat.html?_r=0

And unfortunately, it's seen as a good thing for some. They call themselves "thick" or whatever.

Obesity Less Of A Stigma For Black Women Than White: REPORT

Now, I know some brothas and Latinos who like "thick" girls, but White dudes and Asian dudes are not into "thick" girls, so if you after a White boy or whatever, you might have to get in good shape.

And have some confidence too. Nothing worst than a girl with low self-esteem hiding behind a sweater somewhere. Put yourself out there. Go to the club, get your hair did, buy some nice clothes and you'll be aiiiight, regardless of whether or not you have stereotypically "African" features.

Calipoppy showed you even White royal types love the sisters, but you don't see no "thick" girls with Prince Whatshisname, now do ya?
 
Old 09-19-2012, 12:38 PM
 
895 posts, read 1,177,242 times
Reputation: 466
Quote:
Originally Posted by nyanna View Post
I'm a woman so my appearance matters very much in society. While I'm young its very important that I try to be pretty
Girl, not trying to be nosy but how old are you. If you are dark you have many years of pretty. I was like you. I thought once you hit aka like 27. The ugly hits. This is not true at all especially if you have nice skin. The secret no sugar! I am 31 and I get hit on more than ever from 20year old men to 70.

Hell my mom in her 60s still has men talking to her. She is married btw to my dad.
 
Old 09-19-2012, 12:47 PM
 
895 posts, read 1,177,242 times
Reputation: 466
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lake County IN View Post
Ethiopians and Somalians do not have wide noses. That is only west Africans.



And you care why?

If you think you're beautiful, why do you care what others think?

This is harder said than done. I am sure the OP is very young and has some self esteem development to go through. I see myself in many ways. It is hard not to get caught up in what society views beautiful. I know I am very attractive beautiful African American women. People tell me all the time and I get hit a lot. However, I hardly ever get hit on by white men, and then I start to think that I am ugly. So I know where the OP is talking about

But you have to realize that everyone has different tastes, you have to develop your sense of self and own personality because it even when you are quote beautiful physically in someones eyes and still get rejected. How will you deal with that? It happens all the time and it happened to me.
When you become society's view of ideal beauty the problems of the opposite sex does not stop.
You can be still easily be rejected because even though people first view the physical. It is the overall person that usually keeps someone around.

Even then things still might not work. This is why it is important to get a great sense of self and your ego in check because trust me, you do not want everybody to want you. Everyone is not good for you.
 
Old 09-19-2012, 02:44 PM
 
449 posts, read 731,535 times
Reputation: 456
Quote:
Originally Posted by stephei2000 View Post
This is harder said than done. I am sure the OP is very young and has some self esteem development to go through. I see myself in many ways. It is hard not to get caught up in what society views beautiful. I know I am very attractive beautiful African American women. People tell me all the time and I get hit a lot. However, I hardly ever get hit on by white men, and then I start to think that I am ugly. So I know where the OP is talking about

But you have to realize that everyone has different tastes, you have to develop your sense of self and own personality because it even when you are quote beautiful physically in someones eyes and still get rejected. How will you deal with that? It happens all the time and it happened to me.
When you become society's view of ideal beauty the problems of the opposite sex does not stop.
You can be still easily be rejected because even though people first view the physical. It is the overall person that usually keeps someone around.

Even then things still might not work. This is why it is important to get a great sense of self and your ego in check because trust me, you do not want everybody to want you. Everyone is not good for you.
Why do you start to think you are ugly when white men don't hit on you?
 
Old 09-19-2012, 03:24 PM
 
8,224 posts, read 10,793,715 times
Reputation: 7621
I think Nyanna needs to rethink not dating African and Carribean men.
I don't understand.
From what I see,African and Carribean men find american black women attractive.
And think of this Nyanna....if those features were not attractive,then how are West african women getting married?

As a side note...I see plenty of Asians with wide noses,so much that its on par with West Africans.
 
Old 09-19-2012, 04:24 PM
 
895 posts, read 1,177,242 times
Reputation: 466
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stickytoffee View Post
Why do you start to think you are ugly when white men don't hit on you?
Because when you are use to getting attention from African American, Hawaian, Latino so much it makes you feel good.

It makes me think like Nyanna to a certain degree. I must not have the look they want or I need to lose more weight. But even when I was a size 8 I still had this problem. I am 6ft wear a size 12. I am athletic and need lose about 20-25lbs. But even when I was thinner I would not get hit on by white guys unless is was some drunk at a club which does not count. Plus I do not do that anymore. But it is no excuse I have to work on my eating habits and emotional eating. I do not have an exercise problem. I am very active.

I wonder where the OP lives. Living in the city of Chicago on the Northside as an African American you will start to feel ugly. You feel like the look that only gets love up here is the blond Cubs fans and the funny thing is some of these girls are not even in shape.

However when I go to more liberal suburbs I have been hit on by white men. So I tell OP maybe you need to change location too.
 
Old 09-19-2012, 04:28 PM
 
Location: La lune et les étoiles
17,611 posts, read 19,049,265 times
Reputation: 18919
Quote:
Originally Posted by stephei2000 View Post
This is harder said than done. I am sure the OP is very young and has some self esteem development to go through. I see myself in many ways. It is hard not to get caught up in what society views beautiful. I know I am very attractive beautiful African American women. People tell me all the time and I get hit a lot. However, I hardly ever get hit on by white men, and then I start to think that I am ugly. So I know where the OP is talking about

But you have to realize that everyone has different tastes, you have to develop your sense of self and own personality because it even when you are quote beautiful physically in someones eyes and still get rejected. How will you deal with that? It happens all the time and it happened to me.
When you become society's view of ideal beauty the problems of the opposite sex does not stop.
You can be still easily be rejected because even though people first view the physical. It is the overall person that usually keeps someone around.

Even then things still might not work. This is why it is important to get a great sense of self and your ego in check because trust me, you do not want everybody to want you. Everyone is not good for you.
Why are Black American women using the number of White men who are hitting on them as the measure of attractiveness? It is more likely a matter of your location than of your level of attractiveness.
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