Anchorage Safety (Metlakatla: sale, legal, best)

[Rance]

I have a low education level. At home I'll drink at least one beer a day, every day. I inhale. Heck I even dress like a bum. And yet, here I sit...working an engineering position.

[HighlandLady]

In other words...since we found our home 'in the valley' (why does that sound so derogatory now??) outside of Wasilla, I need to lose my education, become a buxom soiled dove (buxom will be a challenge) and drink until my teeth fall from my head???

[Barkingowl]

Originally Posted by Metlakatla

I'm fairly well educated, but I do like my blueberry vodka and green grass, and never have trouble with the law dogging me for any reason.

That's because your son never made thousands of dollars every week selling bland looking ivory bracelets. Sorry, but I couldn't help myself.

[Barkingowl]

Originally Posted by HighlandLady

In other words...since we found our home 'in the valley' (why does that sound so derogatory now??) outside of Wasilla, I need to lose my education, become a buxom soiled dove (buxom will be a challenge) and drink until my teeth fall from my head???

I've heard that socks can be stuffed into a bra to promote the illusion of being buxom.

[Metlakatla]

Paper towels...Barkley, and it depends on the brand. A woman never wants to use store brand paper towels to stuff her bra...so low class...

[HighlandLady]

I am dying here...Barkley, you are on a roll

[Barkingowl]

Originally Posted by Metlakatla

Paper towels...Barkley, and it depends on the brand. A woman never wants to use store brand paper towels to stuff her bra...so low class...

So those falsies from VS & FOH don't look more realistic?

[My2cats1]

How you view an area depends a lot on your own learning expereince - your perspective with which you interpret facts. I admit whenever somebody notes the number of rapes or murders that Anchorage has each year, it doesn't sound bad at all. It seems peaceful, in fact, after 10 years in Chicago. A common Monday morning headline here is "Seven shot over weekend." Frame of reference is key here.

That said, I can sympathize with any anxiety people might have about Anchorage growing quickly - completely understandable. If trends are negative, now is the time to encourage active civic particpation and change what needs to be changed.

[Barkingowl]

I was at the shoe store yesterday after my MRI. The owner was about that " Into The Wild" movie & more I happened to mention that I was going to be in Anchorage in August & he started telling me that Anchorage looked a lot like Boston. From the pictures I've seen Anchorage doesn't look anything like Boston. I did buy a pair of new hiking boots for the Dog Poop Trail in Juneau.

[Metlakatla]

So those falsies from VS & FOH don't look more realistic?

LOL, wouldn't know, never needed 'em. Vickie's Secret Miracle bra (after I take the padding out) works for me.

I need to lose my education, become a buxom soiled dove (buxom will be a challenge) and drink until my teeth fall from my head???

You can speed this process along just a bit with a little help from a handy little tool called "Tooth Black"--can't recall the brand name; there are probably several. You can buy them in Wal*Mart during the season of Satan's birthday (Halloween). They do give you a bit of a jump on that "valley look" while you settle into the serious business of slugging down vodka and papaya juice till your teeth rot.

Just don't be tempted to cheat and use Sharpie pens instead.