African American Community throughout Arizona (Phoenix: hair salon, neighborhoods, to live in)

[Jaine Blaize]

Originally Posted by brittZ

I do not think there are any specifically black communities with the possible execption of what used to be South Phoenix and that was where the gangs and crime were. I personally think that anywhere you go is going to be fine. The Valley is pretty open and friendly with a few exceptions which you will probably find anywhere.

I do have one question though and I mean no offense. I simply want to understand. You said, "are there good social activities and shopping for African American families? We teach our children about equality, so we're not looking for any segregation..." What exactly are good social activities and shopping for African American families? How are those activities and shopping different from good social activities and shopping for white people, or mexicans, or Asians? How does looking for activities that isolate you as an African American family teach equality? Again, I am not looking to insult, argue, degrade etc. . . just trying to understand.

No offense taken.

I think what the person is saying is that even though they do not want to be totally segregated from other races, they do still want to be able to do things that their culture generally likes to do. This isn’t to say that each race or culture only likes to do certain things and not anything else but the interesting thing about people of different races is that they all have something that they primarily like to do that a majority of people in other races do not.

So, you asked how AA’s activities, entertainment or shopping may differ from other cultures? The best way to explain that is to take a look at the preexisting Mexican culture that already exists here and how it differs from the Caucasian culture. The same would apply with African Americans.

First, Mexicans and White people eat different kinds of food. Mind you, Mexicans and Caucasians do eat the same things at times but the traditional Mexican family’s main dishes are oftentimes different from that of Caucasians. The same applies to African Americans. We may eat the same things that White or even Mexicans do but we also eat different food or at least cook food differently as well. To find some of our products sometimes require that we look all over God’s creation for it and sometimes we STILL can’t find it! We also have different tastes in music, clothes, entertainment and how we relate to each other.

Now granted, you’ve probably met a few African Americans from Phoenix and do not feel that they are any different from you but then again, they’ve had no choice but to adapt to the existing environment and do not have access to what their ethnic group would normally do. So if AA’s want to go to a Jazz or an R&B club that plays JUST R&B without a DJ speaking Spanish? Not in AZ. If so, then you better believe that it’s a hole in the wall somewhere and it’s the only one of its kind. Want to listen to the Radio? Not without an explosion of Spanish. Want to go shopping for clothes? Well hopefully you’ll find a place that caters to women who have hips and butts because the sizes run rather small out here. Also, if they are shaped to accommodate size, then they come in brighter and fluorescent colors than AA’s tend to wear. Want some “down home” cooking or Caribbean food? Well, aside from small places like Honeybears and stray establishments here and there, there’s hardly any place to go to get that.

So they are saying that while they want to integrate with people of all types, they just want to make sure that they have a bit from their own world as well.*****

[Adriel]

There allot of things to do in PHX, I think you and your family will be Okay. PHX basically has everything as for the cities around it there is nothing but house I live like 20min from PHX .

[phxn8iv]

I read the posts from the folks online with interest and amusement. As 40-something Phoenix native who grew up in South Phoenix in a school district that was 97% black & hispanic, I can tell you that the Phoenix I grew up in had very distinct lines between blacks (and other minorities) and the rest of society. Having more people here from big cities has made us more 'metropolitan' and consequently, more accepting of minorities in this town, but I've not seen much integration outside of the workplace.

My observations, through my black friends, is that the community is small and hard to find; A highschool friend & his wife who live in Gilbert - both , degreed professionals - trek 50 miles round trip to attend a black baptist church in South Phoenix because it's where they feel the most comfortable worshipping and what they want to expose their children to, as the baptist churches near them are primarily white. Another friend who works for a large chip manufacturer here does a monthly professional networking event, but finds that the same people are there month after month.

As for entertainment and events, I did see the earlier posts with links to great organizations like the Black Theater Troupe, but I'm unaware of any R&B clubs outside of Phoenix (central Phoenix, specifially) with primarily a black client base (See Bobby C's, Bobby C's and Johnny's Uptown Phoenix Uptown Restaurant, for starters)

That said, I wouldn't omit Phoenix from your relocation options. Just know that there aren't very many black people in Phoenix, and there are fewer upper middle class black people here.

Best of luck, and when you do get down here, try to get to Lo-lo's Chicken & Waffles Lo-Lo's Chicken & Waffles (broken link)
, you'll be glad you did.

[Jaine Blaize]

Originally Posted by phoenixblack

I've noticed within the last 5 years that African American women in Phoenix really seem to be disgusted when black men approach them in a public venue (nightclub, shopping mall, networking event, school, etc.).

I am singling out black women because I am a heterosexual male and I am not interested in approaching men!

Obviously, black women have reasons to frustrated with some black men and vice versa because of interracial dating, abusive relationships, financial irresponsibility, etc.

However, I have faith that the majority of black men (in Phoenix and across the nation) are good people. Lately, it just seems that many black women are incredibly rude to black men in public. Either they'll rudely walk away without saying a word to the men who approach them, laugh at them, embarass them loudly or look at them like they're crazy!

The latest trend that I've seen is that a woman will go out on the dance floor with a brotha and then leave him in mid-song to go hug or dance with another brotha!

If you're not interested, that's fine, but please be polite about it!

If I am way off-base please let me know!

But this is an obvious and alarming trend because I've had talks with many brothas about this topic within the last few months!

Holla!

It's very interesting that you say that some of the black women that you've met out here are rude because I've had the same experience with the black men out here.

First, let me give you some background so you understand what prospective I'm coming from. I've been here in Phoenix for almost four years (my grandmother decided to move out here and my whole family followed), I grew up in New York and I spent nine years living in Atlanta. Moving to Phoenix was definitely a culture shock but because I come from a place where we all speak to each other or at least say hello, I was startled by some of the responses I got from the black men out here. Almost immediately I noticed that while black men had a tendency to be amicable and polite to white and sometimes Mexican women, they had a tendency to look right through black women!! More times than not when I walked past a black man and simply said hello, they would completely ignore me, practically break their necks to avoid eye contact and even go so far as to glance at me before turning their backs or making U turns. Please note that I am not a supermodel but I am far from being gruesome. I consider myself fairly attractive but it became obvious that they never looked at my features before turning away.

And I know what many might be thinking. It's possible that I was imagining this but after this happened more times than I'd like to count, it was obvious that it was more than a coincidence!! Just to compare, I started speaking to several AA women out here and asked them what kind of reactions they get from black men and without even telling them with happened to me, I get the same response. Some went so far as to tell me that I should probably start dating white men because it's been their experience that they appreciate us more!! It was scary!

But then I started to notice some AA men who did say hi. They had no problem smiling, nodding their head, saying hello or having a conversation with me. The funny thing was that when I asked them, all but one said he was from Phoenix and he was a military brat and only started living here when he was 10 years old!

So to further test this theory, I started asking men who would ignore me where they came from! Crazy I know but it was a social experiment and I wanted to see if what I was thinking was correct. So I would go places and when I saw a Black man I would do what I'd normally do. Smile, nod, say hi and move on. Only this time when they looked away, turn their backs, start fumbling with their cell phones or simply look through me, I made it a point to ask him something. Anything just to see how they act. The variety of reactions I got were astonishing! Some give me a look of dread, panic, fear or slight disdain as if they expect to get hit. Others answered the question without breaking stride!!!! At that point, I'd ask them one more question. "I'm sorry. I thought you might be a native of AZ and might be able to help me." ALL but one of them said that they were born and raised here!!! NO JOKE!!!

So this may not be a black man issue but it may be more of a regional black man issue. My take is that there aren't a lot of black women and some of the black men out here are for whatever reason conditioned to pay more attention to and cater to anyone else but a black woman. Meanwhile, I've met several guys who moved out here from other places but they are extremely personable and do act like they've had home training!!! I'd prefer to concentrate on them ;-)

I say all of this to say that over time with women being treated like this out here has probably taken its toll. I am sure that it's built up some animousity and suspicion between men and women. But all you can do is continue to be you and not let those women who allow fear and disappointment to change them, to change you. I hope you'll keep being who you are - polite, friendly and respectful. Over time women respond to their environment and I'm hoping that over time people like us can change the culture into one that is more compassionate and friendly towards each other.***

~Jaine Blaize

[newglyph312]

I am a young black male and I agree with both the men and women on the issue of black dating in AZ. I work with plenty of black men that swear by dating non black women only. The men here are sad and all are not from arizona. They move here because they can't handle the real women from where they lived prior. The men want someone to take care of their sorry egotistical materialistic behinds. Now for the black woman. It's the same they mess with white men for material gain. And some have told me that black men just don't earn enough to be with them. This problem is everywhere in the black community and since everyone moves here from somewhere else the problem is magnified. The midwest the west the east the south we have a problem with each other that involves no respect for each other. I've visited every region and we mistreat each other something terrible. So we can't just blame AZ, since it is so few of us here it is just more apparent.

[Jaine Blaize]

Originally Posted by newglyph312

I am a young black male and I agree with both the men and women on the issue of black dating in AZ. I work with plenty of black men that swear by dating non black women only. The men here are sad and all are not from arizona. They move here because they can't handle the real women from where they lived prior. The men want someone to take care of their sorry egotistical materialistic behinds. Now for the black woman. It's the same they mess with white men for material gain. And some have told me that black men just don't earn enough to be with them. This problem is everywhere in the black community and since everyone moves here from somewhere else the problem is magnified. The midwest the west the east the south we have a problem with each other that involves no respect for each other. I've visited every region and we mistreat each other something terrible. So we can't just blame AZ, since it is so few of us here it is just more apparent.

Thank you for standing up and saying what needs to be said. It's very rare that I have heard a Black man here admit to what he sees and hears and recognizes the ignorance in it. I will agree that we have a certain amount of disrespect towards each other no matter where we go but take it from someone who has lived in the NE, SE and now here that when interacting with our own, it seems to be magnified here.

What I am hoping though is that this won't change people like you from staying the way you are. I say this because after awhile it can be discouraging at times. I am hoping that with enough of us treating each other right, this will at least start a trend that can spread throughout our communities. Starting here. Take care brotha and much success. Also congratulations for noticing this and not falling for what some of our other Black men and women have fallen into.

~ Jaine Blaize

[Jaine Blaize]

Originally Posted by rzlushn

312

I'm also looking to move. Can I ask, what brought you to AZ? Trying to make this place work can kill you. It is def not the place for a single AA woman.

I was thinking Chicago, DC or MD area...

I agree. I am thinking about moving to Charlotte, NC or Virginia. Charlotte has a reasonable cost of living, employment opportunities, cleaner air and a better school system than we do here. Also, the AA community is alot stronger and I want my child to know what it's like to be around all kinds but especially how to treat other people who look like her just as well... if not better.

~ JB

[Jewel2Bfound]

Just want to thank you all that have posted comments regarding cultural living in Arizona. I am a divorced 46 year old (look like I'm thirty) African-American female that may be relocating to Tempe, Arizona. I am in the process of interviewing for a position with Dayton Freight lines. I have been to Scottsdale, Arizona on vacation and it was several years ago. I have a very eclectic personality and would like to get involved with things pertaining to the Arts. I also enjoy Jazz and would like to know of great places to go. Also, I would like to know about rental properties near the Tempe area. Any advice would be great

[PugLuv1]

I have to give you a high five (^^^^5) on this post.

Originally Posted by Jaine Blaize

No offense taken.

I think what the person is saying is that even though they do not want to be totally segregated from other races, they do still want to be able to do things that their culture generally likes to do. This isn’t to say that each race or culture only likes to do certain things and not anything else but the interesting thing about people of different races is that they all have something that they primarily like to do that a majority of people in other races do not.

So, you asked how AA’s activities, entertainment or shopping may differ from other cultures? The best way to explain that is to take a look at the preexisting Mexican culture that already exists here and how it differs from the Caucasian culture. The same would apply with African Americans.

First, Mexicans and White people eat different kinds of food. Mind you, Mexicans and Caucasians do eat the same things at times but the traditional Mexican family’s main dishes are oftentimes different from that of Caucasians. The same applies to African Americans. We may eat the same things that White or even Mexicans do but we also eat different food or at least cook food differently as well. To find some of our products sometimes require that we look all over God’s creation for it and sometimes we STILL can’t find it! We also have different tastes in music, clothes, entertainment and how we relate to each other.

Now granted, you’ve probably met a few African Americans from Phoenix and do not feel that they are any different from you but then again, they’ve had no choice but to adapt to the existing environment and do not have access to what their ethnic group would normally do. So if AA’s want to go to a Jazz or an R&B club that plays JUST R&B without a DJ speaking Spanish? Not in AZ. If so, then you better believe that it’s a hole in the wall somewhere and it’s the only one of its kind. Want to listen to the Radio? Not without an explosion of Spanish. Want to go shopping for clothes? Well hopefully you’ll find a place that caters to women who have hips and butts because the sizes run rather small out here. Also, if they are shaped to accommodate size, then they come in brighter and fluorescent colors than AA’s tend to wear. Want some “down home” cooking or Caribbean food? Well, aside from small places like Honeybears and stray establishments here and there, there’s hardly any place to go to get that.

So they are saying that while they want to integrate with people of all types, they just want to make sure that they have a bit from their own world as well.*****

[PugLuv1]

You took the words right out of my mouth, i've tried to smile a AA man and either he didn't look at me or put his head down. What makes it so bad it's starting to happen in the schools with the younger kids. My daughter is 13yrs old and all her white friends love the black boys so they say. Also the black boys seem to love the white girls also. I just feel AA women really don't have a chance with any race...the AA men like white women who or anything that isn't black...the white men like white women , or anything that isn't black and so on and so on.

Originally Posted by Jaine Blaize

It's very interesting that you say that some of the black women that you've met out here are rude because I've had the same experience with the black men out here.

First, let me give you some background so you understand what prospective I'm coming from. I've been here in Phoenix for almost four years (my grandmother decided to move out here and my whole family followed), I grew up in New York and I spent nine years living in Atlanta. Moving to Phoenix was definitely a culture shock but because I come from a place where we all speak to each other or at least say hello, I was startled by some of the responses I got from the black men out here. Almost immediately I noticed that while black men had a tendency to be amicable and polite to white and sometimes Mexican women, they had a tendency to look right through black women!! More times than not when I walked past a black man and simply said hello, they would completely ignore me, practically break their necks to avoid eye contact and even go so far as to glance at me before turning their backs or making U turns. Please note that I am not a supermodel but I am far from being gruesome. I consider myself fairly attractive but it became obvious that they never looked at my features before turning away.

And I know what many might be thinking. It's possible that I was imagining this but after this happened more times than I'd like to count, it was obvious that it was more than a coincidence!! Just to compare, I started speaking to several AA women out here and asked them what kind of reactions they get from black men and without even telling them with happened to me, I get the same response. Some went so far as to tell me that I should probably start dating white men because it's been their experience that they appreciate us more!! It was scary!

But then I started to notice some AA men who did say hi. They had no problem smiling, nodding their head, saying hello or having a conversation with me. The funny thing was that when I asked them, all but one said he was from Phoenix and he was a military brat and only started living here when he was 10 years old!

So to further test this theory, I started asking men who would ignore me where they came from! Crazy I know but it was a social experiment and I wanted to see if what I was thinking was correct. So I would go places and when I saw a Black man I would do what I'd normally do. Smile, nod, say hi and move on. Only this time when they looked away, turn their backs, start fumbling with their cell phones or simply look through me, I made it a point to ask him something. Anything just to see how they act. The variety of reactions I got were astonishing! Some give me a look of dread, panic, fear or slight disdain as if they expect to get hit. Others answered the question without breaking stride!!!! At that point, I'd ask them one more question. "I'm sorry. I thought you might be a native of AZ and might be able to help me." ALL but one of them said that they were born and raised here!!! NO JOKE!!!

So this may not be a black man issue but it may be more of a regional black man issue. My take is that there aren't a lot of black women and some of the black men out here are for whatever reason conditioned to pay more attention to and cater to anyone else but a black woman. Meanwhile, I've met several guys who moved out here from other places but they are extremely personable and do act like they've had home training!!! I'd prefer to concentrate on them ;-)

I say all of this to say that over time with women being treated like this out here has probably taken its toll. I am sure that it's built up some animousity and suspicion between men and women. But all you can do is continue to be you and not let those women who allow fear and disappointment to change them, to change you. I hope you'll keep being who you are - polite, friendly and respectful. Over time women respond to their environment and I'm hoping that over time people like us can change the culture into one that is more compassionate and friendly towards each other.***

~Jaine Blaize