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Old 12-24-2007, 08:55 AM
 
9 posts, read 26,194 times
Reputation: 12

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Well, I'm officially in Paragould and it's basically what people said it would be. Needless to say, there is a culture shock. The people here, consistantly do not or will not speak proper English and I have to bite my tongue not to correct them. I neither think it's cute or quaint or Southern to speak incorrectly.
Also, my second day here, I got a flat tire, and for 45 minutes, not one person stopped to give assistance. Someone did eventually help, but for those 45 minutes and afterwards I was thinking small town friendliness is BS. I can guarantee you, in Atlanta, I would have had several people within minutes of my flat stop.
The people I've met so far have been pleasant enough, but there isn't any kind of warmness in their voices or in their eyes. I can't really put my finger on it, but it's kind of a stand off feeling.
I can't believe there is no curbside recycling. I know that sounds petty, but we are in the 21st century, I just thought something as basic as that was pretty standard.
If I see one more person (child) wearing camouflage, I'll scream. I get it!!! You are hunters. It's like wearing work clothes on your day off.
Yes, so far these complaints may seem petty, but I'm been in a depressed funk since I've been here. The house my husband picked for us is in a neighborhood I would have never picked. People don't use trash cans here, the just pile there trash at the end of the driveway. My new neighbors have yet to show their faces, no introductions, not even a wave. Even the movers who moved us in noticed that independently of me noticing.
I hoping things get better, and I keep telling myself this is only temporary.
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Old 12-24-2007, 04:13 PM
 
Location: AR
564 posts, read 2,064,165 times
Reputation: 605
Quote:
Originally Posted by beboptheflop View Post
Well, I'm officially in Paragould and it's basically what people said it would be. Needless to say, there is a culture shock. The people here, consistantly do not or will not speak proper English and I have to bite my tongue not to correct them. I neither think it's cute or quaint or Southern to speak incorrectly.
Also, my second day here, I got a flat tire, and for 45 minutes, not one person stopped to give assistance. Someone did eventually help, but for those 45 minutes and afterwards I was thinking small town friendliness is BS. I can guarantee you, in Atlanta, I would have had several people within minutes of my flat stop.
The people I've met so far have been pleasant enough, but there isn't any kind of warmness in their voices or in their eyes. I can't really put my finger on it, but it's kind of a stand off feeling.
I can't believe there is no curbside recycling. I know that sounds petty, but we are in the 21st century, I just thought something as basic as that was pretty standard.
If I see one more person (child) wearing camouflage, I'll scream. I get it!!! You are hunters. It's like wearing work clothes on your day off.
Yes, so far these complaints may seem petty, but I'm been in a depressed funk since I've been here. The house my husband picked for us is in a neighborhood I would have never picked. People don't use trash cans here, the just pile there trash at the end of the driveway. My new neighbors have yet to show their faces, no introductions, not even a wave. Even the movers who moved us in noticed that independently of me noticing.
I hoping things get better, and I keep telling myself this is only temporary.
First of all, don't even start with the accent thing. I can tell you, if someone is being nice to you but uses incorrect grammar and you correct them like they're stupid, the Southern hospitality is going to go right out the window. You're in the deep South, that's going to happen. Keep your mouth shut, because dwelling on things like other people's language skills is a waste of your life. Life's too short for such silly things. Some people didn't get a quality education. Some people didn't have enough money to get a quality education, or had other problems (such as having to drop out in 7th grade to support the family after a death, like my grandfather had to do). Would you find an inner-city youth in Atlanta and correct their grammar at any opportunity? No, because that would get you shot, most likely. You've lucked out, because a lot of people down here will shake their head and let you go, or give you a polite change of subject. I'm sure after you leave they'll mutter something under their breath none too pleasant about you, but you'll never know. We Southerners are nice like that, even if it is fake. At least we're not blatantly rude.

And good Lord, are you nitpicking or what? Recycling? Camoflauge? Warmness of tone? I've always been told, if you go looking to find something wrong with a place, eventually, you're going to find it. From what I hear, you went from a huge place like Atlanta to a small town like Paragould, and you're in shock. You know what? Big deal. You live in a house, don't you? You're not being shot at, are you? So many people have so many problems in their neighborhood, and would KILL to live where you're living right now. If you're stuck there, make the best out of it.

I live in small town Arkansas myself, and I would LOVE to live in Manhattan in a huge apartment right now. But I'm here, and I have to make the best of it. I've never turned on a four-wheeler nor have I hunted or fished. I'm not fond of rednecks, but I can't change them. I try my best to go about my business and get along with the people that are nice to me. My neighbors are full-blown goobers, but I have a wonderful house. As much as I want to complain, I can't about my quality of life. (I'm in a subdivision and my neighbor four houses down has a lighted deer for Christmas hanging upside down off his porch, with red lights hanging down from its neck to give the illusion of bleeding..but if that's the worst thing I've seen, I guess I'm alright). Just block them out and realize that not everything is going to be great. It can't be Atlanta. It's going to be small-town Arkansas. So either make your own little space out of what you've been given or move back home. You're either going to be miserable if you keep dwelling on it or you're going to be happy with what you've got and make the best of it. You can't ride two horses on one ass.

But, I can tell you, for sure, correcting people's grammar and complaining about their fashion sense isn't going to make it any easier on you.
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Old 12-26-2007, 07:06 AM
 
Location: ARK-KIN-SAW
3,434 posts, read 8,795,244 times
Reputation: 1574
Well, sorry that no one stopped to help you fix your flat..was your husband with you? If theres a man working on the tire most people here wont stop cause they figure hes got in under control.
I live in Paragould, and well camoflage is the norm...we wear it in and out of hunting season. And by the way..it is duck season and deer season right now..so you will see more than usual.
As far as the way we speak, dont think because we dont "speak properly" we are ignorant. I guarantee you if someone tries to correct someone or looks dont their noses that isnt gonna make a whole lot of friends.
Trash day is trash day..we pitch it out to the curb and the trash people take it away, thats about as much thought as I give it, unless a coon or possum or a neighbors cat got into it and I have to pick it up.
If you want to recycle there are places here that do, but thats up to you, and is that 21 century thing really necessary to say?
Neighbours..lots of people here just want to do their own thing, but if you need help would give you the shirt off their back..but they might be scared that you would try to correct them about their speech, belittle them about their clothes, or lecture them about the need to recycle, all of which would leave them shaking their head.
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Old 12-26-2007, 10:37 AM
 
9 posts, read 26,194 times
Reputation: 12
Let me make one point clear undertheironsea, I am a Southerner, raised in Charleston, SC and I have nothing against a Southern accent. I have one and I'm proud of it. I suppose my depression about moving to a small, rural part of the country got the best of me and I came off sounding very rude and petty. That certainly wasn't the intention. Just like all of Atlanta isn't "big city and gang", I'm sure all of Paragould isn't "backwards and uneducated". But there are some things about this place that wouldn't hurt the towns folk to change. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to teach our children the importance of recycling. And it is true that if we make things easier for people like curbside recycling, more people would participate.
Proper grammer is important in life. If you are in a professional setting and someone speaks improperly then they aren't taken as seriously as someone who does speak properly. Would you set your children up in a society to have to work extra hard in life to be taken seriously just because of a way of life?
When I got my flat tire, I was alone. My husband wasn't with me. I have nobody to blame but myself for the flat. Changing a tire was something I learned 25 years ago for a Girl Scout badge and something I hadn't had to revisit until a few days ago. The person who did stop was a long haul truck driver and I was very grateful to him for helping me out. And no, his verbs did not agree with his nouns, but I didn't expect that of him. My complaint about the grammer is the people I've come across in professional settings.
Anyway, I will try to have a open mind when it comes to this place. I have been all over the world and what I always try to instill in my children is that people are different everywhere and we should respect that. I suppose I need to heed my own "words of wisdom".
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Old 12-26-2007, 11:47 AM
 
Location: The Rock!
2,370 posts, read 6,854,459 times
Reputation: 803
Quote:
Originally Posted by beboptheflop View Post
Let me make one point clear undertheironsea, I am a Southerner, raised in Charleston, SC and I have nothing against a Southern accent. I have one and I'm proud of it. I suppose my depression about moving to a small, rural part of the country got the best of me and I came off sounding very rude and petty. That certainly wasn't the intention. Just like all of Atlanta isn't "big city and gang", I'm sure all of Paragould isn't "backwards and uneducated". But there are some things about this place that wouldn't hurt the towns folk to change. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to teach our children the importance of recycling. And it is true that if we make things easier for people like curbside recycling, more people would participate.
Proper grammer is important in life. If you are in a professional setting and someone speaks improperly then they aren't taken as seriously as someone who does speak properly. Would you set your children up in a society to have to work extra hard in life to be taken seriously just because of a way of life?
When I got my flat tire, I was alone. My husband wasn't with me. I have nobody to blame but myself for the flat. Changing a tire was something I learned 25 years ago for a Girl Scout badge and something I hadn't had to revisit until a few days ago. The person who did stop was a long haul truck driver and I was very grateful to him for helping me out. And no, his verbs did not agree with his nouns, but I didn't expect that of him. My complaint about the grammer is the people I've come across in professional settings.
Anyway, I will try to have a open mind when it comes to this place. I have been all over the world and what I always try to instill in my children is that people are different everywhere and we should respect that. I suppose I need to heed my own "words of wisdom".
Take it from one very educated Arkansan who can use impeccable grammar when necessary: sometimes we speak with poor grammar because it's a matter of identification with who we are. I know I for one do it reasonably often. I will freely use 'ain't' and any of the other recognized hillbilly vernacular despite knowing it is quite improper. Sometimes I do it to antagonize people, sometimes I do it to appear of inferior knowledge to gain trust or an edge over the person with whom I'm communicating. As a boy I saw oldtimers pull snowjob after snowjob on unsuspecting outsiders by laying on the hillbilly thick enough to cut.. So...be careful in hasty judgements.
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Old 12-26-2007, 05:04 PM
 
Location: AR
564 posts, read 2,064,165 times
Reputation: 605
Quote:
Originally Posted by beboptheflop View Post
Let me make one point clear undertheironsea, I am a Southerner, raised in Charleston, SC and I have nothing against a Southern accent. I have one and I'm proud of it. I suppose my depression about moving to a small, rural part of the country got the best of me and I came off sounding very rude and petty. That certainly wasn't the intention. Just like all of Atlanta isn't "big city and gang", I'm sure all of Paragould isn't "backwards and uneducated". But there are some things about this place that wouldn't hurt the towns folk to change. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to teach our children the importance of recycling. And it is true that if we make things easier for people like curbside recycling, more people would participate.
Proper grammer is important in life. If you are in a professional setting and someone speaks improperly then they aren't taken as seriously as someone who does speak properly. Would you set your children up in a society to have to work extra hard in life to be taken seriously just because of a way of life?
When I got my flat tire, I was alone. My husband wasn't with me. I have nobody to blame but myself for the flat. Changing a tire was something I learned 25 years ago for a Girl Scout badge and something I hadn't had to revisit until a few days ago. The person who did stop was a long haul truck driver and I was very grateful to him for helping me out. And no, his verbs did not agree with his nouns, but I didn't expect that of him. My complaint about the grammer is the people I've come across in professional settings.
Anyway, I will try to have a open mind when it comes to this place. I have been all over the world and what I always try to instill in my children is that people are different everywhere and we should respect that. I suppose I need to heed my own "words of wisdom".
Just to make a point, there is major irony in that reply.

Unless you did that on purpose, that's pretty funny. Just saying.
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Old 12-26-2007, 06:20 PM
 
9 posts, read 26,194 times
Reputation: 12
I never claimed to be a good speller.
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Old 12-26-2007, 07:56 PM
 
Location: Sherwood, Arkansas
362 posts, read 1,088,590 times
Reputation: 278
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stormcrow73 View Post
Take it from one very educated Arkansan who can use impeccable grammar when necessary: sometimes we speak with poor grammar because it's a matter of identification with who we are. I know I for one do it reasonably often. I will freely use 'ain't' and any of the other recognized hillbilly vernacular despite knowing it is quite improper. Sometimes I do it to antagonize people, sometimes I do it to appear of inferior knowledge to gain trust or an edge over the person with whom I'm communicating. As a boy I saw oldtimers pull snowjob after snowjob on unsuspecting outsiders by laying on the hillbilly thick enough to cut.. So...be careful in hasty judgements.
In this part of the country, even if you work in a professional setting, you may come across as being "stuffy" if you always speak perfect English. I don't know exactly what it is, but for some reason it seems as if people think that you are being fake when you always use perfect grammar. After college, I actually had to break myself from constantly speaking "proper" at work, as wierd as that may sound.
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Old 12-27-2007, 01:17 AM
 
Location: AR
564 posts, read 2,064,165 times
Reputation: 605
Quote:
Originally Posted by beboptheflop View Post
I never claimed to be a good speller.
The irony was it was your only misspelling.



But I digress.

I'm bored, as you can tell. I'll take my leave now.
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Old 12-27-2007, 10:44 AM
 
3,381 posts, read 11,810,245 times
Reputation: 760
As for people not being warm, that often happens when someone blazingly "new" comes into town. If you come in with a bad attitude and roll your eyes when people use incorrect grammar, people will notice and automatically give you the cold shoulder. I agree with everyone above - using slang doesn't mean you are uneducated and ignorant. The grammar I use at work is nothing like what I use with friends. It's comparable to people cursing....people may curse all the time at home, but they don't do it in the office.

As for the camo, as goofy as it looks, I agree....that's just what people in the rural south do. It would be like going to Chicago and complaining about everyone wearing Bears shirts. Your clothes reflect your lifestyle. I don't get the analogy of "it's like wearing work clothes on your day off." Unless you're working at McDonalds, people dress about the same everywhere. If people hunt a lot in their personal life, that's the type of clothes they will wear on the weekends. If you live in Manhattan and you go to clubs and trendy bars all the time, then your clothes would reflect that.

Don't get me wrong...I'd be extremely depressed too if I moved to Paragould...but that's why I will never be living there. Everything I remember of Paragould and the area is pretty typical of every small town I've ever been to, so "small town way of life" should have been expected. I can't imagine moving there from Atlanta...but the way of life shouldn't have been such a surprise to you. Paragould is tiny compared to Atlanta.

Just try and be friendly...kill them with kindness. If you long for a big city atmosphere, spend a weekend in Memphis or St. Louis.
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