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Old 01-16-2010, 11:34 AM
 
Location: Nebraska
4,222 posts, read 7,018,669 times
Reputation: 6608

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I always check the Arkansas joke thread in the Arkansas forum. I have decided that Arkansas must be one of the few places left where anyone appreciates a good joke. Thanks to all of you for giving me a few laughs in the past few months.

GL2
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Old 01-17-2010, 06:04 PM
 
Location: Hot Springs Village, Ark
365 posts, read 893,954 times
Reputation: 332
We need a few laughs, don't we. I will not see my front yard until April.
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Old 01-17-2010, 06:07 PM
 
Location: Fort Smith, Arkansas
1,466 posts, read 3,706,048 times
Reputation: 1046
Are all you Nebraska folks following the old baseball coach this way? It is well documented that Dave Van Horn left Nebraska for Arkansas only because of the jokes he gets to hear in the dugout.
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Old 01-18-2010, 10:04 AM
Status: "Not politically correct" (set 16 days ago)
 
Location: Western Colorado
10,605 posts, read 11,709,270 times
Reputation: 24359
Want to hear some great jokes, humor? Have breakfast at a small diner in a farming community. I've found most of the people of Arkansas who are not recent transplants have a great sense of humor.
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Old 01-18-2010, 11:01 AM
 
44,762 posts, read 43,324,031 times
Reputation: 14450
NY has a sense of humor, especially in NYC.
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Old 01-18-2010, 06:27 PM
 
9,807 posts, read 12,955,705 times
Reputation: 8127
-------Is Arkansas the only state with people who have a sense of humor ?----

No
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Old 01-18-2010, 06:28 PM
 
111 posts, read 327,099 times
Reputation: 177
Arkansans have a great sense of humor but just make dang sure you park straight*. We (I grew up there so it is still "we") don't cotton to no crooked parking.

*(referencing another thread)
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Old 01-19-2010, 05:24 AM
 
Location: Bella Vista, Ark
69,538 posts, read 79,825,470 times
Reputation: 38882
Quote:
Originally Posted by gthog61 View Post
Arkansans have a great sense of humor but just make dang sure you park straight*. We (I grew up there so it is still "we") don't cotton to no crooked parking.

*(referencing another thread)
absolutely priceless!!!!

Nita
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Old 01-19-2010, 06:42 AM
 
Location: Whiteville Tennessee
8,262 posts, read 16,002,814 times
Reputation: 10024
Quote:
Originally Posted by nmnita View Post
absolutely priceless!!!!

Nita
"look how that idiot parked!" "he must be from Texas!"
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Old 01-20-2010, 09:21 AM
 
10,157 posts, read 9,948,499 times
Reputation: 3914
Actual SAT Test Answers in Arkansas

S.A.T. TEST QUESTIONS

The following questions and answers were actually collected from SAT tests given in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16-year-old students! (Don't laugh too hard----one of these kids may be the President someday.)

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.

Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (E.g., abdomen.) A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarian Section."
A: The caesarian section is a district in Rome.

Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.

Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport.

Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab wears on his head.

Q: What is a Hindu?
A: It lays eggs.
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