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Old 01-22-2014, 10:47 AM
 
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I went to Japan with my foreign friend the other summer(me being Japanese)
Surprisngly I got a lot of stares and coughs/spits near me when I was with him...
I was like wtf... lol
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Old 01-25-2014, 12:49 AM
 
Location: Earth
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Alphaville - Big In Japan [1984] - YouTube
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Old 01-25-2014, 01:11 AM
 
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I have been here in Japan for about 22 years - stretching back to '78 and full time since '93. So I may have some insights. (Like you I first came here in the military)

Yup, Japanese truly respond to how you are dressed. When I have to be in a suit I get the best reactions. When I dress down it is hit or miss.

There is some possibility that you are showing your mood and getting reactions to that? I tend to notice more negative reactions when I am not feeling great - so I try to smile more. Sometimes I will put on some music that makes me feel better which helps my mood but also helps me present a more pleasant face too.

One thing that helps me get through the rough periods is owning my decision to stay here. I remind myself that it was my decision to come back and to stay here. Every day I get up and don't just get on a plane home I know it was my decision to stay. And any negative reactions I get - those people don't have that choice.
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Old 01-26-2014, 08:35 PM
 
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Why not try Vietnam? I hear that's the land of opportunity these days.
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Old 05-07-2014, 07:32 AM
 
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Bump. I ran across this blog article. 8 Things I Don’t Miss About Living In Japan | Thought Catalog

Quote:
The stares.

I don’t mind the curious gaze of adorable little peachy-cheeked kids, or the kindly, interested glances of wrinkly Japanese grannies. I’m talking about the sullen schoolgirl trying to kill you with her eyes. The old fart salarymen who glare at you with brazen contempt. The manicured, plucked and Louis Vuitton-bedecked young woman whose mouth drops open with utter disgust when she claps eyes on your unwashed foreign self. If you simply must STARE at the foreigner, please to rearrange your face first so it doesn’t look like quite so much like someone is trying to force feed you poop. Because that is never a good look.
It's almost like I wrote this myself... except, I don't look like the writer at all (other than appearing to be unmistakably foreign). I suddenly feel a bit less self-conscious, if anyone can be randomly bombarded with negative treatment in public.
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Old 05-07-2014, 09:45 AM
 
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I was in Japan a year ago and I didn't experience that at all. People were really friendly and nice to me. When I got lost in the subway people came up to help me. If I get stranded anywhere else in Asia, then no one will come to help me.

The only exception was the hotel receptionist who was a grumpy old man, but the room was nice so I didn't care. Potentially it could be because I'm a quite young, but I don't think it matters much.

My belief it is in your head. When things start going wrong in your life, then you notice those gestures more easily. There is a lot of people on the street, so don't be surprised if someone gives you a nasty stare. Just ignore it, they don't know you and is the minority. Just focus on enjoy your life and build up new friends.
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Old 05-07-2014, 10:12 AM
 
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In my experience, I'm impressed by the blog writer's choice of language. It describes the intensity perfectly, with no exaggeration.

I'll try my best to not internalize it, as though there's something wrong with what I'm wearing, or even my gender or skin color. I'll agree that my doubts about appearance are all in my head, but not the a-hole behavior that I've encountered from strangers, every time that I'm in public.


Edit: At the same time, I was able to recover luggage that I lost on a train within an hour, that I'm sure a passenger took time to return to the station, without stealing any of the contents. In short, Japan is just an incredibly interesting place.

Last edited by nc17; 05-07-2014 at 10:25 AM..
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Old 05-07-2014, 10:32 AM
 
Location: Guangzhou, China
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Camlon View Post
I was in Japan a year ago and I didn't experience that at all. People were really friendly and nice to me. When I got lost in the subway people came up to help me. If I get stranded anywhere else in Asia, then no one will come to help me.
I've found that people in China are the same way. So long as I'm not wearing headphones, people will offer to help me in Chinese and English if I ever look lost or confused.

Literally from my first 20 minutes on the ground at Shanghai International, when a teenager saw me looking confused at the water dispenser near the bathrooms, to when I asked a porter on a motortrike how to get to a specific square, he redirected me, and then a few minutes later appeared alongside me to make sure I was going the right way, ask me where I was from, tell me I had a cool bike, and ask me how I liked China, I've found the vast bulk of people here to be friendly and helpful.
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Old 07-12-2014, 06:31 AM
 
Location: Macao
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nc17 View Post
I'm black, male, 33. I came here in 2000 at 20. It was an overwhelmingly great experience. I was treated well pretty much everywhere. And I don't mean the dirty pick-up bars. But now I can't go anywhere without seeing super unfriendly gestures like angry stares, stomping feet, storming out of a room. Not the store, not the airport, nowhere. I'm not the sexiest man alive, but I'm skinny, dress well, good hygiene, well mannered. I look about 25 on a good day. I've traveled through different parts of the country, just to check if I was going crazy. It's all the same. Normal treatment catches me off guard now.
Sounds like you need a break...
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Old 07-17-2014, 08:57 AM
 
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I have another job in a different part of Japan. It's the same stuff whenever I'm out in public. I'm learning to just ignore it, not sure what else I can do. (trust me, I've applied and am still applying for work in the States)
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