U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > World Forums > Asia
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 10-09-2015, 02:33 AM
 
Location: Guangzhou, China
9,779 posts, read 13,359,093 times
Reputation: 11309

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Natnasci View Post
...and Canada. He takes EVERY chance to slag the US and Canada. Saying RIDICULOUS things like " Vancouver and San Francisco are not real cities. "

He has a size issue problem, but he refuses to do anything about it.
I read back through this entire thread today, and I do think it's funny - and a little sad - seeing the way that some Overseas Chinese folks boost day-to-day life in China. In some cases, you get people who emigrated to the US/CAN as adults and simply suffer from the same issues of integration and familiarity that you can expect after having to adapt all of your life habits and behaviors to a new environment (which happens for Americans who move from, say, California to New England, or Canadians who move from BC to Nova Scotia); in others, you have people who either moved at a very early age or were born in North America who have painted a picture of a place where whatever personal or social problems they have at home are absent.

Of course, I stand by my earlier claims that, at least in urban China, there is no shortage of "exciting" things to do, but this is the case in any major North American city, as well.

"Oh well in China, you see people out at night playing mahjong and drinking beer with their friends." Yup, and in the Americas, you see them in a bar with their friends, drinking beer and talking or playing cards.

"Nightlife in the US revolves around sex." Not really, and it's no different from in China. Go to any bar, club, KTV, or even BBQ here any given night and look at all the girls dolled up, and the guys ogling them.

The young Chinese-Americans I've known who spent their youth boosting life in China and later either emigrated, or spent extended times living here, ended up having a much more American identity at the end of it all, because they realized that no, they aren't Chinese.

Your parents didn't save up to buy you a house, so you're a 25-year old who doesn't have a house, thus isn't ready for marriage and therefore can't get a date. You don't speak the language anywhere near as well as you thought you did, and even if you do, your accent means that people will always remind you that you're different. You get told often, either jokingly or offensively, that you "aren't really a Chinese." You start to get repulsed by the spitting, peeing, crapping, pushing, shoving, shouting, nose-blowing, hawking, and generally uncouth behavior around you much more than the white or black foreigners do, because you feel that it is a personal affront to your sacred Chinese identity, while to them, it's "just what they do." This identity was forged primarily by the Chinese-Americans and -Canadians you grew up around, who tended to be more affluent, better-educated, and more cultured than the norm; now, every day, you encounter Chinese people who are broke, of average or below-average intelligence, poorly-mannered, oblivious to what you believe constitutes "Chinese culture," superstitious on a level that borders on childish...

... so you start to sneer at the "low-class people" and try to cluster with wealthier, more educated Chinese. And they ask why you don't have a house or a Maserati. They like you, you think, but then you start to worry that it's just a matter of saving face because they're relatives, or friends of relatives. When you go to KTV together, they make fun of you for singing songs that are eight years old. They introduce you as their American cousin, and you are treated about the same as you would be if you were white, but with slightly less interest. If you're a guy, the girls aren't interested in you because they are a) already betrothed to someone else, b) concerned that you don't have that house, c) baffled at how to think of you because you're Chinese but not. If you're a girl, they guys aren't interested in you because a) they are already betrothed to someone else, or b) they assume you must have had a gasp!! WHITE BOYFRIEND at some point. Maybe two, or even three!! And you probably had sex with them. You are always, at best, on the periphery of this scene, and it makes you feel like a damn loser.

No one talks to you at all on the streets or even acknowledges you're there because you look exactly like everyone else and thus aren't anything special in anyone's eyes. You've never been invited to join a mah jong or checkers game, and for that matter, you're not really sure how to play it. Because of the cultural gulf with your coworkers, they don't ask you out unless there's a big, company-wide function. The isolation starts to set in, worse than it ever was back in what you now realize - somewhat sheepishly - is, in fact, your "home." You realize that you took offense to the fact that people back in the US or Canada treated you like one of them, because you were convinced you weren't, in fact, one of them, but something different. Now here you are, and... you're something different.

With some frustration and reluctance, you end up going to an expat bar and downing a couple IPA's, because you are sick of the fermented water they call Harbin and Tsingtao. Some white guy sits next to you, you introduce yourself and the first thing you tell him is that you're an American or Canadian. You BS about sports teams you never cared about back home. You talk about how much you miss burritos and how awesome Game of Thrones is. You suddenly find yourself gushing about how much you can't wait to go back home because you're sick of what a crowded mess this place is. You are in the middle of talking about how much you missed having a yard when a song by Blink 182 comes on. You never liked them, but suddenly you jump up and say, "OH MAN! I LOVE THIS SONG!" and start singling along to it and dancing with another American or Canadian. You exchange wechats and meet up again for beer the following night. They never question how American, Canadian, or Chinese you are and you continue to chat about mundane crap with them. You realize you don't actually have much in common with this person, and yet, you feel more familiar with them than you did with any of the Mainlanders you've spent time with up till now.

This is basically the narrative I've seen played out here numerous times, and also I heard relayed to me from friends in the US who went through this. I have yet to encounter a Chinese-American who has moved here and integrated or embraced life in China to anywhere near the degree that I see and hear overseas Chinese describe the matter.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 10-09-2015, 02:37 AM
 
Location: Guangzhou, China
9,779 posts, read 13,359,093 times
Reputation: 11309
Quote:
Originally Posted by botticelli View Post
If not for the status of being the capital which enables it to keep sucking resources from all around the nation, Beijing would be hardly a livable place, not alone being a big city. Despite its northern location, summers can be very hot - almost as hot as Atlanta. 40C is not uncommon.
It doesn't sound much worse than Boston, NYC, or Philly in that sense, other than being further inland (though only by like 60 miles, and connected to the ocean via development that extends to Tianjin).

Admittedly, I never enjoyed the extremes when I spent my teens in Boston. Scorching, humid summers; three feet of snow in the winter. At least the falls are nice...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-09-2015, 05:06 AM
 
919 posts, read 603,026 times
Reputation: 369
Quote:
Originally Posted by 415_s2k View Post
This is basically the narrative I've seen played out here numerous times, and also I heard relayed to me from friends in the US who went through this. I have yet to encounter a Chinese-American who has moved here and integrated or embraced life in China to anywhere near the degree that I see and hear overseas Chinese describe the matter.
You should become a writer!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-09-2015, 08:07 AM
 
9,012 posts, read 8,316,195 times
Reputation: 14429
Quote:
Originally Posted by botticelli View Post
Funny that people complain about China being boring.

I guess it is nothing but cultural difference in terms of what people consider "fun". As far as I know, 95% of Chinese students in the US would consider the US as an extremely boring country.

Except for a few major metropolis, the vast majority of America is dominated by the homogeneous suburbs and low rise single family homes with a tiny downtown which has some stores (mostly chain) and restaurants (many of which are chain too).

New York City is the only city that come close to what most Chinese people consider busy, vibrant and happening cities. Places like Boston and San Francisco are considered "small cities" as a matter of fact. Cities like Seattle and Vancouver look half dead and can hardly pass as cities.

In most American cities, stores close at 6pm, sometimes 5pm on weekends, and don't open until 11am (or 12pm). This is unimaginable in China where stores usually open between 10 and 9/10pm.

And this coupled with the fact that most American downtowns are not that safe (and very small) which means it is not wise to being walking on the streets with a few friends at night (instead of being in a car).

I am not saying American cities are bad, they are just not as vibrant and most Chinese young people prefer (or are used to) a more urban lifestyle, while America doesn't really offer much of that and its advantage lies in offering much better access to the nature outside the city.

If someone loves exploring the nature, enjoying doing things like hiking, swimming etc, then America is an ideal place for them, on the other hand, if someone enjoys cities more and likes shopping, restaurants, plus all the activities they do in Asian cities (karaokay, playing cards etc) America appears excruciatingly boring.
I've gotten so used to Asian guys telling me the difference between how extremely boring the U.S.
is compared to their own home countries, I can't even listen to it anymore, lol

But as far as that goes, it's not the people from China complaining here....

It's the people from Korea going on & on about how lively & busy Korea is at all hours.
They say that Seoul never sleeps, & NY can't compare (they think NY is lame, actually -& I agree.)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-09-2015, 09:05 AM
 
10,847 posts, read 11,265,341 times
Reputation: 7586
Quote:
Originally Posted by believe007 View Post
I've gotten so used to Asian guys telling me the difference between how extremely boring the U.S.
is compared to their own home countries, I can't even listen to it anymore, lol

But as far as that goes, it's not the people from China complaining here....

It's the people from Korea going on & on about how lively & busy Korea is at all hours.
They say that Seoul never sleeps, & NY can't compare (they think NY is lame, actually -& I agree.)
yep, that's what I have been saying, it isn't China or US or Korea that is boring. It is because whoever is complaining isn't into the kind of fun things locals do.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-10-2015, 08:59 PM
 
919 posts, read 603,026 times
Reputation: 369
Quote:
Originally Posted by botticelli View Post
yep, that's what I have been saying, it isn't China or US or Korea that is boring. It is because whoever is complaining isn't into the kind of fun things locals do.
Generally speaking, I agree with you.

But, it is not strange for me that a foreigner feel bored in China, just like many locals who feel bored in their home towns.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-10-2015, 11:40 PM
 
4,665 posts, read 2,641,137 times
Reputation: 3342
I've lived in China part time for 3-4 years and in the US full time since birth. Both countries have their own benefits. China's entertainment revolves around city life, Karoake, bars, clubs, Majong, hanging out with friends, eating, eating, eating. The US doesn't have Karoake to the same degree, great Chinese cuisine, or Majong of course, but we do pretty much have everything else. The US also has camping, backpacking, road tripping. China also has a lot of sightseeing, some very ancient neat stuff, the downside of course is the crowds. The US has a lot of natural things to do, like National Parks, and most don't have the crowds like China does.

In no way is either country boring, they both have some individual perks. China's big ones are cuisine, Karaoke, and ancient culture. The US has some incredible National Parks and our cities are pretty great too, especially some of our museums, zoos, or art centers. I've been to some of the top museums, zoos, art centers in China and they simply don't compare to the US.

I'd give China the edge in day to day life entertainment, but I don't know if I could live in China 365 days a year, the pollution and crowds get to me, but if you are born there, that probably doesn't matter as much. I'll take living part time in both countries.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-11-2015, 12:21 AM
 
749 posts, read 597,113 times
Reputation: 842
Quote:
Originally Posted by 415_s2k View Post
I read back through this entire thread today, and I do think it's funny - and a little sad - seeing the way that some Overseas Chinese folks boost day-to-day life in China. In some cases, you get people who emigrated to the US/CAN as adults and simply suffer from the same issues of integration and familiarity that you can expect after having to adapt all of your life habits and behaviors to a new environment (which happens for Americans who move from, say, California to New England, or Canadians who move from BC to Nova Scotia); in others, you have people who either moved at a very early age or were born in North America who have painted a picture of a place where whatever personal or social problems they have at home are absent.



.......................

Good point. These are all good observations that apply not only to the Chinese diaspora but also to many emigrant communities who feel inadequate everywhere.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-11-2015, 02:01 AM
 
4,665 posts, read 2,641,137 times
Reputation: 3342
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bettafish View Post
Most are not interested in western women to begin with.
If you check Chinese men's computer, almost all porn videos are Japanese.

In China, men do not usually approach unknown women either. The vast majority marry their classmate, colleague, someone from friend circle, or someone introduced by relatives.

Asian Americans, Japanese, Filipinos ... who do not spit etc. are often rejected by white women too.
I don't know. Last time I went to China I had a semi-attractive white female with me. My wifes (who is Chinese) friend, and she got hit on a LOT, like nearly every restaurant, karaoke place, bar, parks, etc. lol Chinese guys who didn't know any English were all off a sudden wanting to practice their English with her. I will add, Chinese guys are still more prone to being shy then Westerners, but I still think their is an allure for something different or exotic. Americans are probably the most shy Westerners. That might surprise a lot of Asians, but that's true from my experiences. Also, from my experiences, Chinese bars and clubs are not that different then American bars and clubs. In fact, give it a few years, and besides a few cultural differences, and of course the language difference, I don't expect any differences.

There are stronger family values in China, but from what I discovered, so many guys/girls/parents hide things from their families. For example, my wifes friend dated, and actually lived with a guy for almost a year, while going to school in a different city, and her family never found out. I honestly think things like that happen more often then people realize. China is fairly socially liberal, it's just all in the closet you could say, people aren't as open about it as in the US, but that will gradually change, everything does change.

For the last part, I know 2 white women who have married Chinese men and I know another who wants to go to China with us next time to date Chinese men, and try to find one to marry... So I do think it's changing, Asians are not looked down upon like they used to be.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-13-2015, 04:25 PM
 
268 posts, read 324,729 times
Reputation: 170
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattks View Post
Also, from my experiences, Chinese bars and clubs are not that different then American bars and clubs. In fact, give it a few years, and besides a few cultural differences, and of course the language difference, I don't expect any differences.
What?! In the majority of (Chinese) bars/clubs in China people stand around not dancing, but talking and playing dice games at tables. Clubs with actual dance floors are few and far between in China. And in most places it is not possible to go to a bar or club unless you have a group of people and are planning on spending a lot of money buying alcohol. That being said, I've had far more memorable experiences in Chinese clubs than in US ones. They don't close until 4 am or later unlike in the US! And don't even get me started on the craziness that can happen in KTVs.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > World Forums > Asia
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top