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Old 10-03-2015, 03:45 PM
 
124 posts, read 274,430 times
Reputation: 59

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I ran across an interesting article in Japan Times entitled "Spare a thought for the Western men trapped in Japan." [url=http://www.japantimes.co.jp/community/2015/03/23/voices/spare-thought-western-men-trapped-japan/#.VhBJ8vlVikr I found the links in the article especially interesting. I had toyed with the idea of going to Japan to live, but......
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Old 10-03-2015, 04:39 PM
 
3,431 posts, read 3,051,616 times
Reputation: 4133
It raises some interesting issues for anyone dreaming about moving overseas to start a new life with a "local". Making such arrangements work longterm is a huge challenge.

I have a relative who went over to Japan to teach English 20 years ago. He's still there, working as a translator at a corporation. He's married to a Tokyo native and they have two young daughters. They're making it work, but that's the exception rather than the rule. Her family totally accepts him, which is a HUGE plus. OTOH, there are negatives: as a foreigner he doesn't qualify for a gov't pension--so what are they going to do when it's time for him to retire? The kids are biracial--not a huge problem so far, but will happen to them when they're adults?

Other problems I've heard of with foreign marriages include child custody disputes when the marriages fail. Foreigners don't necessarily have any custody or visitation rights, period.

The article you linked to was critical of Japanese women looking for spouses who can be "breadwinners"... but what else do they expect in a country where women don't work once they're married? One pay check, that's all they have and that's all they'll ever have. Also, due to the traditions in the country, adult children live at home until they're married, and they don't contribute to the household with their own job money. So my relative with two daughters? He has to support them, and his wife, and himself, until the daughters get married and move out. IF they ever do. On one pay check. Now can we see why single Japanese women want a spouse with big career ambitions?
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Old 10-03-2015, 06:08 PM
 
97 posts, read 224,133 times
Reputation: 22
I have been trying to follow the changes in the Japanese economy. A young (40+) nephew of mine recently committed suicide--apparently despondent over his employment, marriage, etc. prospects (or lack thereof.) Other in-laws are having increasing difficulties making ends meet on retired pay. I am attaching a couple of links that may be of interest---http://www.japanesestudies.org.uk/discussionpapers/2009/Obinger.html or
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2015-0...e-hard-living-

Please disregard the comments in the Zerohedge linked article.
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Old 10-03-2015, 06:21 PM
 
Location: Taipei
6,776 posts, read 5,128,008 times
Reputation: 4566
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ottawa2011 View Post
Other problems I've heard of with foreign marriages include child custody disputes when the marriages fail. Foreigners don't necessarily have any custody or visitation rights, period.
Yeah this is so, so heartbreaking. I've read from Taiwanese sites that foreigners(both men and women) never get custody once the marriage hits the rock. They usually end up with very limited to zero contact with their children since the court would almost always favor the locals. If the marriage ends in bad terms(which happens, sadly, more often than not), the "foreign" side wouldn't even have any visitation rights. Even if the situation is less ugly, what can one do? Stay for 18 years just for the kids and get depressed by the lack of any serious job opportunities other than teaching English? The thought of that is simply horrifying.
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Old 10-03-2015, 06:40 PM
 
16 posts, read 12,235 times
Reputation: 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by mexicomike View Post
I had toyed with the idea of going to Japan to live, but......
Go to Korea or China instead.
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Old 10-03-2015, 06:42 PM
 
Location: Elysium
6,593 posts, read 3,643,660 times
Reputation: 4587
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ottawa2011 View Post
It raises some interesting issues for anyone dreaming about moving overseas to start a new life with a "local". Making such arrangements work longterm is a huge challenge.

I have a relative who went over to Japan to teach English 20 years ago. He's still there, working as a translator at a corporation. He's married to a Tokyo native and they have two young daughters. They're making it work, but that's the exception rather than the rule. Her family totally accepts him, which is a HUGE plus. OTOH, there are negatives: as a foreigner he doesn't qualify for a gov't pension--so what are they going to do when it's time for him to retire? The kids are biracial--not a huge problem so far, but will happen to them when they're adults?

Other problems I've heard of with foreign marriages include child custody disputes when the marriages fail. Foreigners don't necessarily have any custody or visitation rights, period.

The article you linked to was critical of Japanese women looking for spouses who can be "breadwinners"... but what else do they expect in a country where women don't work once they're married? One pay check, that's all they have and that's all they'll ever have. Also, due to the traditions in the country, adult children live at home until they're married, and they don't contribute to the household with their own job money. So my relative with two daughters? He has to support them, and his wife, and himself, until the daughters get married and move out. IF they ever do. On one pay check. Now can we see why single Japanese women want a spouse with big career ambitions?
Isn't the Japanese government pension about half of the average American Social Security benefit? Nice to have but can be overcome easily by privately preparing for your own retirement. Expats normally make such calculations before they go and tend to rely on themselves rather than birthright benefits.
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Old 10-03-2015, 09:00 PM
 
919 posts, read 603,473 times
Reputation: 369
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ottawa2011 View Post
as a foreigner he doesn't qualify for a gov't pension--so what are they going to do when it's time for him to retire?
This is not true.

Why don't you tell your relative this infomation?

National Pension

All people who are registered to reside in Japan and aged between 20 and 59, irrespective of their nationality, must be covered by the National Pension system by law and must pay contributions to support elderly people, people with disabilities, and bereaved family members.

Last edited by Oldhag1; 10-04-2015 at 01:53 PM.. Reason: Removed red font
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Old 10-04-2015, 01:37 PM
 
Location: Scandinavia
65 posts, read 46,735 times
Reputation: 29
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ottawa2011 View Post
It raises some interesting issues for anyone dreaming about moving overseas to start a new life with a "local". Making such arrangements work longterm is a huge challenge.

I have a relative who went over to Japan to teach English 20 years ago. He's still there, working as a translator at a corporation. He's married to a Tokyo native and they have two young daughters. They're making it work, but that's the exception rather than the rule. Her family totally accepts him, which is a HUGE plus. OTOH, there are negatives: as a foreigner he doesn't qualify for a gov't pension--so what are they going to do when it's time for him to retire? The kids are biracial--not a huge problem so far, but will happen to them when they're adults?

Other problems I've heard of with foreign marriages include child custody disputes when the marriages fail. Foreigners don't necessarily have any custody or visitation rights, period.

The article you linked to was critical of Japanese women looking for spouses who can be "breadwinners"... but what else do they expect in a country where women don't work once they're married? One pay check, that's all they have and that's all they'll ever have. Also, due to the traditions in the country, adult children live at home until they're married, and they don't contribute to the household with their own job money. So my relative with two daughters? He has to support them, and his wife, and himself, until the daughters get married and move out. IF they ever do. On one pay check. Now can we see why single Japanese women want a spouse with big career ambitions?
That explains the japanese almost non existent fertility rates and the number of single men. Who in their right mind wants to have children or wife in an environment like the one you just described? The japanese economy is dead until they push through some economic or social reforms or make robots to replace humans.
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Old 10-04-2015, 10:03 PM
 
956 posts, read 1,547,698 times
Reputation: 474
Quote:
Originally Posted by apekonge View Post
That explains the japanese almost non existent fertility rates and the number of single men. Who in their right mind wants to have children or wife in an environment like the one you just described? The japanese economy is dead until they push through some economic or social reforms or make robots to replace humans.
At least there's absolutely NO WAY you're going to deal with crazy gunmen like it happened in Oregon just a few days ago.
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Old 10-05-2015, 10:41 PM
 
Location: Guangzhou, China
9,779 posts, read 13,363,470 times
Reputation: 11309
Quote:
Originally Posted by OZpharmer View Post
At least there's absolutely NO WAY you're going to deal with crazy gunmen like it happened in Oregon just a few days ago.
I don't see how that really lessens any of their social problems. It's like telling someone who just got paralyzed from the waist down that it could be worse, they could be like that guy who is paralyzed from the neck down...

The US gets to deal with spree killings; Japan gets to deal with suicides and the occasional otaku serial killer.
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