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Old 08-21-2018, 11:30 AM
 
Location: Howard County, Maryland
5,661 posts, read 3,643,856 times
Reputation: 16588

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Quote:
Originally Posted by hildebrand57843 View Post
It quite possibly is drivel, I posted to this provoke a discussion. And I don't see why it should go there, my thoughts aren't based on relationships but just on general interactions. Feel free to prove me wrong.

Have you discussed the various cultures with East Asian men in roughly equal numbers as women, or have you limited your contacts to women? Your answer to this will help determine if this post belongs in this forum or should be moved to the Relationships forum.
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Old 08-22-2018, 01:56 AM
 
Location: Guangzhou, China
9,779 posts, read 13,353,482 times
Reputation: 11309
It's tough to get a real take on how people socialize till you get to the country itself and create a social circle. I know people here in China who hated living in Japan or Korea and have much better social lives and others who hate it here because it was better for them there.

Also, people always socialize differently online vs real life. I will say that in terms of naivety, which could affect how people you meet online may react to continued contact and romance, Japan is the least and Chinese is the most.
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Old 08-22-2018, 05:02 AM
 
12,279 posts, read 18,401,528 times
Reputation: 19102
Quote:
Originally Posted by hildebrand57843 View Post
So I'm quite young so I haven't had the pleasure of traveling since I'm saving up money for school, and I hope one day to spend a month in Japan. So in the meantime I like to learn about each of the cultures quite equally. And I thought "hey, I'm pretty anti-social but if I join a penpal website I can talk to people from these cultures" and it's been very eye opening. It's easy to see what a culture is like but to talk to people from there, to see how they act, can definitely impact someone. And I'd say after quite a bit of talking online, my love for Japan has declined slightly whereas my interest in Chinese and Korean culture has risen.


I found that it was very difficult to establish a connection with the Japanese girls I've talked to. They are very polite, and can hold a decent conversation, but generally most of the conversations I had with them were cold, with one exception - We talked quite well and even met in person, she showed a lot of interest (quite a bit of touching), but that went south very quickly, very disapointed.


Compare that to the Chinese and Korean girls I talked to, which was vastly more carefree. Most of the ones I talked to had an interest in cooking, as do I, and were more than willing to talk and have long conversations with me. In fact I made a best friend on there from China, probably the nicest and coolest person I've ever met. Even when I was rejected irl by a Chinese girl, they still managed to be very warm afterwards.


I really want to dive into Japanese culture more, since I really love it and it speaks to me like no other one does, but I can't really shake the feeling that I was a bit let down. However now I'm a lot more interested in China and Korea as a result.



These are just my naive thoughts. Maybe one day when I visit and live in each respective country, my opinion will change.



Anyone with similar opinions? Anyone disagree?
There are so many limited factors here - you are talking online contact for one thing. How much can you really learn about a women, assuming it's a woman at all, or even from the country they claim to be from.
You didn't make a "best friend" from China, you have a online contact, that's it. How did this contact from Japan involve person to person meeting?
People can give you advice on different cultures however I strongly advise that you cannot really apply it to your current way of meeting or contacting women.
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Old 08-24-2018, 01:11 PM
 
Location: Taipei
6,773 posts, read 5,119,529 times
Reputation: 4565
Boy do I love reading 15 yo virgin's Dear Diary.
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Old 08-25-2018, 03:04 PM
 
2,845 posts, read 3,935,604 times
Reputation: 3234
Come on, let's humour the OP.

Hildebrand57843, I spent 18 years in Asia, speaking with men and women in both their native languages (Mandarin and Malay) and in English. Since I doubt that you can speak anything other than English, we can assume that you are chatting with Asian girls in English.

You are a mild amusement to them, I suspect, but then they quickly lose interest. Why? Because they are young and have short attention spans and a broad choice of chat partners.

Learn what you can from them and then move on. Don't try to read too deeply into any of it. There is a subset of Asian girls who are both lonely and interested enough in learning English to find you exotic and then boring. Don't take it personally. The real hotties already have boyfriends from their own culture or else a Sugar Daddy.
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Old 08-30-2018, 04:27 PM
 
297 posts, read 93,352 times
Reputation: 635
OP... move to SF or LA.
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Old 08-31-2018, 03:56 AM
 
Location: Macao
15,945 posts, read 36,154,437 times
Reputation: 9478
Quote:
Originally Posted by kukumjacka View Post
OP... move to SF or LA.
Asian-Americans abound, but Asian-Americans run when they meet a white guy who appears to have 'yellow fever.'

He's better off talking to the ones with the language barriers.
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Old 08-31-2018, 10:28 AM
 
297 posts, read 93,352 times
Reputation: 635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tiger Beer View Post
Asian-Americans abound, but Asian-Americans run when they meet a white guy who appears to have 'yellow fever.'

He's better off talking to the ones with the language barriers.
Yellow fever is not so much of a thing these days in SF/LA because there are a lot more Asians and cross-breeding has already begun. It's fairly common to see asian-white couples. Not so much asian-latino and a little less asian-black but they're out there.

I think it's a matter of curiosity on both sides.
Little story... Chinese girl came to US to study. Not much attraction to white men but she was very very interested in getting it on with at least one. She was attractive, yes, but she was way too flashy with her clothes, car and accessories, which instantly made her non approachable by white men. And there was the cultural difference. She realized that she had nothing in common with the small amount of men who did approach her. This is someone I know personally.
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Old 09-05-2018, 10:31 PM
 
43 posts, read 43,830 times
Reputation: 37
Quote:
Originally Posted by hildebrand57843 View Post
So I'm quite young so I haven't had the pleasure of traveling since I'm saving up money for school, and I hope one day to spend a month in Japan. So in the meantime I like to learn about each of the cultures quite equally. And I thought "hey, I'm pretty anti-social but if I join a penpal website I can talk to people from these cultures" and it's been very eye opening. It's easy to see what a culture is like but to talk to people from there, to see how they act, can definitely impact someone. And I'd say after quite a bit of talking online, my love for Japan has declined slightly whereas my interest in Chinese and Korean culture has risen.



I found that it was very difficult to establish a connection with the Japanese girls I've talked to. They are very polite, and can hold a decent conversation, but generally most of the conversations I had with them were cold, with one exception - We talked quite well and even met in person, she showed a lot of interest (quite a bit of touching), but that went south very quickly, very disapointed.



Compare that to the Chinese and Korean girls I talked to, which was vastly more carefree. Most of the ones I talked to had an interest in cooking, as do I, and were more than willing to talk and have long conversations with me. In fact I made a best friend on there from China, probably the nicest and coolest person I've ever met. Even when I was rejected irl by a Chinese girl, they still managed to be very warm afterwards.



I really want to dive into Japanese culture more, since I really love it and it speaks to me like no other one does, but I can't really shake the feeling that I was a bit let down. However now I'm a lot more interested in China and Korea as a result.



These are just my naive thoughts. Maybe one day when I visit and live in each respective country, my opinion will change.



Anyone with similar opinions? Anyone disagree?

you should go to greece and italian first. I don't know why young americans has so much interest in japan. greece and italia are the first destinations for world travelers.
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Old 09-07-2018, 09:42 AM
 
13 posts, read 3,615 times
Reputation: 10
Most people don't have the chances to talk to foreigners. Most also don't know about other countries' details.

It is not they don't like to talk to foreigners or about sexual orientation.

Many Japanese and Taiwanese women like to talk to women not men.

This start when girls were in schools, in japan and taiwan, girls can quickly be close friends with other girls, while more shy and have less common topics with boys.

Women also have more common topics with men in their country and easier to communicate with men fluent in their languages than foreign men.

Asians in general are more shy and slow to become friends compared with westerners. Asian women are more passive.

People generally don't approach or ask strangers.

Students don't discuss much and just follow instructions from teachers.

Last edited by seasoncb; 09-07-2018 at 09:58 AM..
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