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Old 08-07-2010, 08:01 PM
 
Location: Honolulu, HI
20 posts, read 46,901 times
Reputation: 18

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Quote:
Originally Posted by eskercurve View Post

RE: Foreigners not making a lot of friends, a lot of this is because Japanese people have experienced meeting foreigners and find them rude.
I don't think that's true. Foreigners are nice in general and I saw many of them hang out with Japanese. But, if you're not a Japanese male, forget about getting promoted and advace in career like Japanese would do at most firms even though you speak native Japanese.


Quote:
Originally Posted by moskiter View Post
Do you know how they treat depression in Sweden? They send people with depression to Russia or Kazakhstan for some period of time to some ugly, poorly cared cities and after they get back to Sweden they feel much happier. So maybe instead of going to Japan go to some gipsy village in Romania, then you'd stop complaining about Austin
Good point. Well... there are folks like me who feel depressing when they are away from home, especially right after they had a good time visiting family and friends in their home country and come back to a foreign land.
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Old 08-07-2010, 09:44 PM
 
Location: Outside of Los Angeles
1,248 posts, read 2,346,239 times
Reputation: 795
I'm not saying Japan is perfect, but I'm comparing it to Los Angeles only, not to the whole US. There are lots of things wrong with my current place of residence, that's a fact because I live there and I see what's going on. Japan has problems too but it can't possibly be worse than LA. It depends what a person is looking for in life.
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Old 08-08-2010, 02:07 AM
 
12,677 posts, read 14,059,781 times
Reputation: 34728
Quote:
Originally Posted by AliveandWell View Post
I'm not saying Japan is perfect, but I'm comparing it to Los Angeles only, not to the whole US. There are lots of things wrong with my current place of residence, that's a fact because I live there and I see what's going on. Japan has problems too but it can't possibly be worse than LA. It depends what a person is looking for in life.
Exactly, and this point seems to be totally lost sight of by so many people in these "X country vs Y country, which is better?" threads.
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Old 08-08-2010, 02:41 AM
 
242 posts, read 668,238 times
Reputation: 193
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tiger Beer View Post
Sounds like you live in Tokyo - you also mentioned working long hours, commuting, and the crowding as well.

Japan is a HUGE country...just like not everyone who lives in America, lives in New York City, not everyone who lives in Japan is required to live in Tokyo.

I live out in the Japan countryside...have short work weeks, and I'm a Father...living in a fairly sizeable apartment - 4 rooms, balcony, etc.

I think people never seem to explore the many options of Japan - as about 95% of what I read about Japan, is always from a Tokyo perspective. Just like a person in NYC can move out of NYC for more space and less crowding, the same applies to Tokyo/Japan.
I agree to an extent, except, unfortunately, everything is concentrated in the Tokyo metropolis area. I think this centralization is a problem for Japan. It's as if LA, DC, and NYC were all combined into one city (in terms of the type of work, entertainment available, and amount of people).
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Old 08-08-2010, 03:05 AM
 
242 posts, read 668,238 times
Reputation: 193
Quote:
Originally Posted by AliveandWell View Post
I'm not saying Japan is perfect, but I'm comparing it to Los Angeles only, not to the whole US. There are lots of things wrong with my current place of residence, that's a fact because I live there and I see what's going on. Japan has problems too but it can't possibly be worse than LA. It depends what a person is looking for in life.
Right. If I had a really nice paying job, I'd probably move to a coastal area in California in a heartbeat. But in my position, especially in this economy, I'd likely be stuck living in the grimier parts of LA. Comparing those options, there is no way I'd move there.

I can't agree about the rudeness part. It doesn't take long to understand social customs. I think Japanese are just used to spending most of their time with classmates, then their coworkers, so friends tend to be related to those groups. A foreigner who isn't a part of either doesn't have a way in, unless the Japanese person wants to go out of their way to meet foreigners, which is a very small percentage of people here (in this case, the large population size helps), or you pick up the language and start joining some clubs or spend more time with Japanese coworkers. It may depend on the city as well. Some claim Tokyo-ites tend to be less friendly in general and used to seeing foreigners, so they aren't really excited to meet them.
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Old 08-08-2010, 04:25 AM
 
Location: Mount of Showing the Way
1,953 posts, read 2,068,651 times
Reputation: 615
Trip to Hiroshima & Nagasaki is recommended.
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Old 08-08-2010, 11:15 AM
 
Location: Chicago, IL
513 posts, read 996,028 times
Reputation: 274
Quote:
Originally Posted by japanese001 View Post
Trip to Hiroshima & Nagasaki is recommended.
Lech Walesa (a Polish president) has promised us that Poland would become the second Japan if he wins. He meant development of course but people made fun that we would get bombed as Japan...
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Old 08-08-2010, 12:00 PM
 
Location: US Empire, Pac NW
5,008 posts, read 10,788,165 times
Reputation: 4125
Quote:
Originally Posted by Honolulu is calling View Post
I don't think that's true. Foreigners are nice in general and I saw many of them hang out with Japanese. But, if you're not a Japanese male, forget about getting promoted and advace in career like Japanese would do at most firms even though you speak native Japanese.


.
There's a clear difference in work vs. private life situations.
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Old 08-08-2010, 05:31 PM
 
Location: Macao
15,943 posts, read 36,139,074 times
Reputation: 9478
Quote:
Originally Posted by poxonyou View Post
I think Japanese are just used to spending most of their time with classmates, then their coworkers, so friends tend to be related to those groups. A foreigner who isn't a part of either doesn't have a way in, unless the Japanese person wants to go out of their way to meet foreigners, which is a very small percentage of people here (in this case, the large population size helps), or you pick up the language and start joining some clubs or spend more time with Japanese coworkers. It may depend on the city as well. Some claim Tokyo-ites tend to be less friendly in general and used to seeing foreigners, so they aren't really excited to meet them.
Funny, as earlier, when I read you were having trouble making Japanese friends, I was going to question if you put any effort into the language.

Here, on this post, I can see you haven't.

Sounds like you are expecting to ONLY speak English with everyone, and have them 'make friends' on your terms....i.e. by speaking English only to you, and accomodating to all of your needs, translating things for you at social functions, on and on. (Meanwhile, most Japanese simply do not have the English ability to do that).

If you really think about it...imagine you lived back in the States...and you had a German friend who only spoke German to everyone. How many friends is he going to make? Probably NONE....except for some American guy who knows or is interested in German. Let's say you are that guy who knows German...so okay, you can practice your German with him, but still, it's a burden having to translation everything for him 24/7 in every situation, just because he refuses, is unwilling, or completely uninterested in learning the language that everyone around him speaks.

(Also, if you are married with kids as I am, and the other post gave that assumption - it is also a bit problematic trying to expand a social circle as well, isn't it? The demands of being a father and husband).

My Japanese isn't much better, but out here in the countryside, everyone is quite friendly, and I easily find myself being invited to quite a few functions by Japanese people, I just find that the demands of family life, work, and keeping up the social network of friends I already have, just doesn't allow me time to 'accept random invitations' by random others not within my own sphere of immediate interests.
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Old 08-08-2010, 07:04 PM
 
242 posts, read 668,238 times
Reputation: 193
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tiger Beer View Post
Funny, as earlier, when I read you were having trouble making Japanese friends, I was going to question if you put any effort into the language.
You're making a lot of assumptions. Japanese isn't a language that a English speaker is going to pick up quickly when they're here working and also enjoying the new country and life. I study quite a bit, and most people I know do as well. I can't disagree that one needs to learn the native language. That was the point I was making. I don't want someone reading these forums to get the impression that many Japanese people speak English. Many newcomers I met here, and myself included, assumed because they had been taught it since at least junior high school, they would have some basic speaking abilities. Not to say that they should accommodate English foreigners and we should be lazy. Rather like the situation in many other developed countries where English is a definite second (or third) language, though foreigners are still expected to learn the native language of course.

It's important to stress this so someone coming here realizes they need to seriously commit to learning the language, and it takes more time if you're here working, if they truly want a chance to fit in here. That's different than making friends. It's easy enough to find friends here, you'll just realize you won't have access to the vast majority of the population at all.
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