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Old 11-16-2013, 01:56 PM
 
Location: Rational World Park
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Grandstander View Post
Nah. Then you'd be stuck in the position of having to spend your time pretending to respect religion.
Yep.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:03 PM
 
Location: Rational World Park
4,999 posts, read 3,914,472 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cheektowaga_Chester View Post
I understand that. And my suspicion is your partner would understand that too. Ninety nine percent of people would be able to reconcile differing viewpoints on religion easier than they would someone who is a phoney baloney.
How can you reconcile the fact that your partner believes you're going to be roasting for eternity? These aren't just different view points. It's a completely different way of life. How do you share a life with someone who lives a completely different lifestyle. Totally not for me.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:08 PM
 
Location: Parts Unknown, Northern California
42,289 posts, read 18,870,026 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cheektowaga_Chester View Post
I understand that. And my suspicion is your partner would understand that too. Ninety nine percent of people would be able to reconcile differing viewpoints on religion easier than they would someone who is a phoney baloney.
I do not think so. If my spouse or lady friend is informed that I do not respect her conclusions with regard to the legitimacy of mythology and superstition, she will translate that into "Doesn't respect my mind."

Or consider a situation where she wants to donate a portion of our money to some spiritual organization which I view as nonsensical. What happens when we have a major disagreement about something and her position is shaped by her religion? What happens when she begs me to accompany her to religious services...."if you loved me you would...etc"

Further, my closest friends are all non believers. How am I to introduce a religious person into this mix without causing problems?

Finally, I can't imagine finding someone whose qualities and character I admire enough to want to have a long term exclusive relationship with, who still subscribes to what I view as preposterous beliefs.

You made up the 99% business, you have no basis for knowing such a thing.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:12 PM
 
Location: Massachusetts
2,017 posts, read 3,847,621 times
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I am agnostic leaning pretty heavily toward atheism and my husnabd is a pretty strong believer. We acknowledge the differences and don't really talk about it too much. I respoect his point of view and he doesn't expect me to change. It is a second marriage for him - he has kids from his first marriage and I have no interest in having any. So I acknowledge the fact that we will not be having kids makes this considerably easier than it would if we were going to have kids. Every once n a while he will make a stray remark like "So you really believe we evolved from monkeys?" or something like that, but I simply won't engage in the argumant since I know it will go nowhere. He isn't much of a church-goer either, which also makes it easier. Maybe once or twice a year or so he gets the urge to go, usually around Easter or Christmas. I go out of respect for his beliefs because it is important to him.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:28 PM
 
1,420 posts, read 2,662,183 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frozenyo View Post
How can you reconcile the fact that your partner believes you're going to be roasting for eternity?


These aren't just different view points. It's a completely different way of life. How do you share a life with someone who lives a completely different lifestyle. Totally not for me.
Because not all religious people are that extreme in their beliefs.

Also, do you not have friends with people who are religious? How could you be friends with someone who "believes you're going to be roasting for eternity" etc? How? You probably just don't discuss it. You don't have to pretend. Same goes for other things in life: politics for example. It is impossible for a hard core dem to be friends/married with someone who is a hard core GOPer? No.

A good relationship is an aggregate of many things. Just because one out of 69 aspects are totally opposite, doesn't mean the relationship is doomed.

It happens all the time.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:50 PM
 
40,643 posts, read 27,157,936 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HRMSmilingCrow View Post
Does he believe that you, being female, are "less than" and subservient to him?
Or have you straightened him out on that issue?
Any man who does is immature and any woman who does NOT straighten him out is immature.
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Old 11-16-2013, 02:57 PM
 
Location: Florida
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I doubt that I would have dated someone very religious - at least not past the first 3-4 dates. I would never consider getting serious with someone devout.
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Old 11-17-2013, 08:36 AM
 
14,253 posts, read 15,470,478 times
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So long as she was good in bed and didn't bang on about religion then I would have no problem.

And a couple of hours to myself on a Sunday would be welcome too.

I had a GF who was very catholic. She was a bit mystified that I wasn't religious. She also informed me that we were committing a mortal sin by sleping together before we were married. But it never stopped her
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Old 11-17-2013, 09:25 AM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
9,049 posts, read 6,593,340 times
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A relationship with a woman who is religious is not going to happen. It's too big of an issue for me.
I'd rather be lonely...
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Old 11-17-2013, 10:45 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles
269 posts, read 169,789 times
Reputation: 58
to be frankly honest...as soon as i knew they were christian or muslim, the 2 leading religions that are holding humanity for a ransom, i would be repelled...not that this religious belief system is anything someone is born with...like race, gender, sexual orientation...religious beliefs are adopted for one reason or another and as far as i can tell, they are all really bad reasons. however...that being said....attraction knows no boundaries....
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