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Those of you that are suggesting that this person should just go to church so the parents will not cause anymore problems is like telling an employee that if their boss tells them that they must go to a certain church every Sunday or get fired, that's what they should do.
I strongly disagree.
Don't you think he has the constitutional right not to be coerce to attend a particular religion?
Because he's under 18. I do not think it's right but he'll have to put up with it until then.
Those of you that are suggesting that this person should just go to church so the parents will not cause anymore problems is like telling an employee that if their boss tells them that they must go to a certain church every Sunday or get fired, that's what they should do.
I strongly disagree.
Don't you think he has the constitutional right not to be coerce to attend a particular religion?
Then his parents have the Constitutional right to boot him out of the house.
I will be 18 in a couple months, and in the past 2 years, I have consoled in my parents the fact that I don't believe in God. I was raised since preschool as a roman catholic, and as I grew up, I started seeing fundamental gaps in what I believe in. I realized how much fighting went on because of religions; I decided that I was agnostic about a year ago.
The first time I told my parents, at age 16, that I wasn't sure of my faith in God, they were insulted. I had asked them to let me stop going to church for a few months in order to see if I still felt as if I was missing something, and they explained to me that I couldn't because I was to set a role model for my brother and sister. Although the irony of being an example of questioning one's faith eluded me, I understood and accepted my role as a sponsor. I asked them to please not push the religion on to me, because I wanted to believe, but I was worried that I'd be pushed away if I couldn't make my own decisions about something important to me.
Today, I asked my mom why they were forcing me to volunteer for the church fair even though I have nearly 70 hours of community service this year and have respected everything they told me. My mom was offended and told me that if she didn't push religion on me, she wouldn't be doing her job as a parent. I asked her what I was incapable of deciding about myself that she knew better, and she didn't give me a straight answer, but continued to say it was her job. I explained that once I'm in college, I will not be going to church with them anymore, and although I respect what they believe, it's ultimately my choice. This led to her saying that she would pull me out of school if that was the case, as it was immaturity and I wouldn't be ready for college.
I have been going through the motions of church for 2 years now, out of respect for my parents and siblings. I can understand why they are so persuaded to push me in what they believe in. I love and respect my parents, but I can't do this much longer. I don't understand why they would put my academic success in jeopardy over something like this. I'm almost always a well behaved, friendly, and understanding person -- I worry what they think religion is teaching me that I can't learn from other people.
If anyone actually reads all of this rant (sorry!), would you be able to give me some advice? This whole "wait till you're 18" doesn't really apply to me, it will be as long as I live with them.
Don't live with them when you turn 18?
I moved out at age 19 and never went back. Religion was the main reason I had such a terrible upbringing which included church every Sunday and witnessing as well as being the victim of domestic violence.
I can't find anything good to say about Catholicism which is how I was raised so I strongly disagree with you on that point. I recently sat through a couple of Catholic masses (wedding and funeral) and it made me sick to my stomach, all of it. It also brought back bad memories of my childhood. That as well as all religions is not needed in order for one to be a good person.
Quote:
I believe that Catholicism is beautiful in some of it's teachings,
Last edited by John13; 08-09-2014 at 06:43 AM..
Reason: re-wording
Your parents are doing wrong, everyone has freedom for believings - human rights
Call social services and ask them to tell your parents leave your believings alone
I'm sure he would be laughed at when he tells them the story.
Chances are great he will be talking to one of them when he calls. He is under age and has very little rights when it comes to this.
However, if he refuses to go to church and gets beat up because of it then maybe he can be placed in another home. Times are a bit different today compared to when I was growing up which was the 1960s/early 70s.
Those are the choices the OP has right now.
I'd do whatever I could to move out shortly after the OP turns 18.
I'm sure he would be laughed at when he tells them the story.
Chances are great he will be talking to one of them when he calls. He is under age and has very little rights when it comes to this.
However, if he refuses to go to church and gets beat up because of it then maybe he can be placed in another home. Times are a bit different today compared to when I was growing up which was the 1960s/early 70s.
Those are the choices the OP has right now.
I'd do whatever I could to move out shortly after the OP turns 18.
He said he's only a couple of months from turning 18. The issue he has to deal with is that his mother threatened to turn the money flow off if he doesn't go to church. So, if he wants to go to college, he has to deal with his parents.
He said he's only a couple of months from turning 18. The issue he has to deal with is that his mother threatened to turn the money flow off if he doesn't go to church. So, if he wants to go to college, he has to deal with his parents.
So, if he wants his parents to pay for his college/continuing education, he has to deal with his parents.
Your parents are doing wrong, everyone has freedom for believings - human rights
Call social services and ask them to tell your parents leave your believings alone
Good luck with that idea. Even if social services would get involved in micromanaging a parent's beliefs and priorities in the absence of any quantifiable physical abuse or neglect -- which they will not -- it would be a pyrrhic victory. Talk about not picking your battles well!
The simple fact is that many, many parents -- and not just theists, either -- think they not only can but should impose their values and beliefs on their adolescent children. We can debate whether that's advisable or not, but the reality is that parents have that pretty much unbridled right. Given that, there are really only two choices for a child in that situation who is not able / willing to buy his parent's beliefs:
1) Go along to get the largesse
2) Don't go along, and get by without the largesse
The demands are seldom so onerous or the largesse so puny that (1) is not the way to go in 99% of the cases. Which is probably why things got to be as they are in the first place.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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I would really think if you want to take your parents money for college in exchange to being forced to practice a Christian lifestyle. I would rather be in student loan hell or sleep on a park bench than be in a house where a parent tried to force Christianity on me.
Of course you have alternatives. Join the military, grin it for 4 years and get a GI Bill for the college money. Or find a realitive who is not brainwashed and see if they would extend you room and board.
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