Interracial dating for a black woman in ATL? (Atlanta, White: fit in, school)

[PJG]

I've got a few things to say on this post. First, who I am. I'm a white man who dates black women and white women. Not much into other races other than that. However, I am slightly more attracted to black women.

I've been all over the country, but I've lived in Atlanta for all of my life, with heavy ties to the midwest. I've been here for 35 years or so, and have had, and continue to have lots of contact with other major cities such as NYC, Chicago, DC and LA. While I haven't LIVED there, I've travelled there for lengthy stretches, often for months on end).

I have found that Atlanta, possibly because of the high transplant factor, is the LEAST racist of all those cities. (Here's where I'll get natives from those others cities to blast me....I don't care).

I've never been outright assaulted in Metro Atlanta on a date with a black woman like I have in other cities. I've never felt in fear of my, or my dates safety in a club in Atlanta like I have in other cities. Not to say that Atlanta is a safe haven, but it's been far, far less of an issue, from MY experience.

Here in Atlanta, I HAVE gotten ugly stares, back-glances, clicking of the teeth, etc., but nothing really "ugly" and nothing that I haven't seen elsewhere. I've never had a drink tossed on me and my date as I leave, as I did in DC. No other man grabbed his crotch at my date and asked her a most disgusting question as has happened in NYC, and I've never been cornered and verbally abused by an angry black midwife like I was in Chicago. (Actually, had I not been laughing the whole time, I think she would have really scared me.)

Atlanta is very tolerant, but it can be otherwise, just more mild. More from the black community than the white community? Tough call. It's been different. I've had my masculinity openly questioned by black men, who also make obscene gestures to my dates, and I've faced icy stares and ugly comments in private from white men. But I've also been slipped phone numbers from black women, as if it's that forbidden and delicious taboo.

I guess what I'm saying is, Atlanta is probably more tolerant of interracial dating than other major cities, but it's becuase you'll be hard pressed to meet people here who are originally from here. They all moved way out in the sticks.....that being said.....Atlanta is an ISLAND of tolerance in a sea of southern baptist hypocrisy.

In the end, I couldn't care less what others think. They don't have to answer to the creator for my actions--I do, and I'm perfectly comfortable to do so when that time comes.

My only "hmmmmm" on your post is that the way you worded it, you seem to have resigned yourself to dating outside your race, as if it's not what you WANT to do, but you suppose you will, becuase it's best, and not what you really want to do. if that's the case, you'll be miserable, and you could mislead your partner. I say follow your heart, everything else doesn't matter.

[tgify2001]

My only "hmmmmm" on your post is that the way you worded it, you seem to have resigned yourself to dating outside your race, as if it's not what you WANT to do, but you suppose you will, becuase it's best, and not what you really want to do. if that's the case, you'll be miserable, and you could mislead your partner. I say follow your heart, everything else doesn't matter.

I didn't mean to imply that at all! My concern was with how open-minded non-black men would be. I grew up in a suburban mostly-white setting and I feel as though I have more in common with people from that kind of background.

[kayrob]

Actually PJG I've gotten just the opposite impression from her posts.

[fil]

Originally Posted by tgify2001

Thanks for the replies!

My concern was not with how other people would react to my ir dating, but rather if any non-black men would ask me out at all! I am from the North and have lived both there and on the coasts (NYC and SF). I have no knowledge of the South and how much it has changed from its past history. Please enlighten a sista!

Ha, if you're cute and have a good personality, you'll do fine.

[rcsteiner]

Originally Posted by tgify2001

I didn't mean to imply that at all! My concern was with how open-minded non-black men would be. I grew up in a suburban mostly-white setting and I feel as though I have more in common with people from that kind of background.

I'd personally have a lot of fun dating a black girl. I'm not sure my wife would approve, though. But I'd have no problem! :-)

[kayrob]

Originally Posted by rcsteiner

I'd personally have a lot of fun dating a black girl. I'm not sure my wife would approve, though. But I'd have no problem! :-)

I hear you on that. In fact though I have a Black wife who I love it wouldn't be so bad just sampling all of the other flavors on the menu. But I'm not crazy. LOL.

[ehoez]

Originally Posted by fil

Unless you go to Cumming, no one cares about interracial relationships in Atlanta because it's prevalent.

Have at it girl and good luck!

lol..........

[Britishintown]

It's hard to believe this is the 21st century at times.

[23rdpslm]

ok sista (can I call you that even if I'm not black?)
Here's my 2 cents:
I think you may be suprised at the amount of attention you will get from guys of any race. Like all relationships, it's a give a take situation so as long as you are willing to put in the effort that any relationship really requires I'm sure you are in for a very enjoyable and refreshing experience.

Don't be afraid to approach someone your interested in, they may not know right away that you are even willing to talk to them in they are from a different race. After all, you are just making conversation and meeting new people. Practice approaching men you know you aren't interested in just to get warmed up and show interest in them, not becuase you want to date them but becuase it will help you build a rapport with more types of people. Once you've acquired this information you will be unstoppable, after all, you are an intelligent and beautiful black woman. Am I right?

[LeeH]

I am a white male from LA,I have considerd moving to ATL,I feel most black women in ATL are under alot of pressure to not date outside their race.I go to ATL alot and go only to black clubs as I like to dance,love Rand B etc,and have found it extremely hard to meet someone.If you move there your best bet is to post your dating preference on craigslist.