Why am I so ambivalent about relocating to ATL? (Atlanta: to rent, find a job)

[Julie2122]

I've wanted to relocate for some time from the DC metro area to ATL, but I was waiting for a position at my salary level to open up. Last week, I was notified that there were several full-time permanent positions at my grade level that recently opened up at my organization's Atlanta regional office. I was quite vocal about wanting to move into a regional position, so my manager made a few calls and now she believes that I will be interested in accepting a transfer to the Atlanta office.

My sister (who is also my best friend) and her husband reside in the Atlanta area, but things aren't going well for them (due to the fact that they do not have stable good paying positions). I make nearly six figures, and I would continue to make the same money in ATL, but I don't want to relocate if my sister and her husband plan on leaving soon, due to the economy.

I've also been thinking about my life and the fact that I'm single. I know that ATL is not a good place for single African American women. Also, ATL doesn't strike me as a diverse city, because it primarily consists of native blacks and whites.

I do however like the idea of living in a substantially lower cost of living area; therefore, I feel like I should jump at the opportunity, but for some reason, I no longer want to. I know it's crazy because I pay so much to live in the DC metro area, but I feel like it's worth it, because the area is far more cosmopolitan than Atlanta.

However, in all honesty, the living expenses are getting a little out of control. What would you do, if presented with the same situation? Would you move, or would you stay in the DC metro area?

[Atlanta_BD]

Originally Posted by Julie2122

I've wanted to relocate for some time from the DC metro area to ATL, but I was waiting for a position at my salary level to open up. Last week, I was notified that there were several full-time permanent positions at my grade level that recently opened up at my organization's Atlanta regional office. I was quite vocal about wanting to move into a regional position, so my manager made a few calls and now she believes that I will be interested in accepting a transfer to the Atlanta office.

My sister (who is also my best friend) and her husband reside in the Atlanta area, but things aren't going well for them (due to the fact that they do not have stable good paying positions). I make nearly six figures, and I would continue to make the same money in ATL, but I don't want to relocate if my sister and her husband plan on leaving soon, due to the economy.

I've also been thinking about my life and the fact that I'm single. I know that ATL is not a good place for single African American women. Also, ATL doesn't strike me as a diverse city, because it primarily consists of native blacks and whites.

I do however like the idea of living in a substantially lower cost of living area; therefore, I feel like I should jump at the opportunity, but for some reason, I no longer want to. I know it's crazy because I pay so much to live in the DC metro area, but I feel like it's worth it, because the area is far more cosmopolitan than Atlanta.

However, in all honesty, the living expenses are getting a little out of control. What would you do, if presented with the same situation? Would you move, or would you stay in the DC metro area?

I'm a single black female who is about to leave Atlanta in the next few days due to my inability to find decent-paying work here. I'm moving so that I can be with family AND find work.

Now granted our situations are different. Because you make good money, you may be able to make Atlanta work for you since you will be able to afford to rent or buy a nice place, go out and do things and be able to travel to other places to meet men because of your salary. DC is high as heck so I definitely see the appeal of wanting a cheaper cost of living.

I've lived in Atlanta for nearly 20 years and I have not been able to find a husband or serious boyfriend (the men here seem to only want casual sex). In all of the years that I've lived here, only one of my black female friends has gotten married. Let other people on here tell it, I must have something wrong with me if I can't find anyone in Atlanta, but a lot of other black women I know who are attractive, successful and have great jobs in Atlanta are also single and dateless. One of my friends who has a masters degree left last year because she couldn't find a job (could never find steady work the entire time she lived here) and never went on a date in the 8 years she lived in Atlanta. The majority of my single black female friends have either left Atlanta or are making plans to leave this year all for the same reasons--no career growth and no dating opportunities. Truth be told, some of my white female friends are having the same problems also.

I don't want to give a slanted view because my experience with Atlanta in terms of dating and earning a decent salary have been negative and I can't wait to get out of here. But because you have a job already and make good money, it may be different for you. Coming here with a good-paying job gives you a bit of an advantage given that jobs are hard to come by in Atlanta. Hopefully you will be able to have a dating life.

[North Beach Person]

Because you want to move but there are situations (your relatives possibly moving) outside your control.

You probably want to move partly because of work and partly to be close to your sister, who may be leaving.

Your parameters have changed and now you're hesitant.

[ElleKaye]

It does not sound like you're ambivalent. It sounds like you're more on the don't want to do it side. You're a bit wrong about the population of Atlanta being mostly native blacks and whites. I don't know where they went, but I rarely run into someone who is not a transplant. You are spot on right about the dating scene though. I mean seriously you may have to join a church if you want to get married.

Aside from lower cost of living and your sister, I'm not clear why you wanted to move here in the first place. However, if intuition is telling you no, then follow it. We have intuition for a reason.

[Atlanta_BD]

Originally Posted by ElleKaye

It does not sound like you're ambivalent. It sounds like you're more on the don't want to do it side. You're a bit wrong about the population of Atlanta being mostly native blacks and whites. I don't know where they went, but I rarely run into someone who is not a transplant. You are spot on right about the dating scene though. I mean seriously you may have to join a church if you want to get married.

Aside from lower cost of living and your sister, I'm not clear why you wanted to move here in the first place. However, if intuition is telling you no, then follow it. We have intuition for a reason.

Great post, indeed! I really don't see the impetus for the OP to move here either. Especially since her family is possibly moving elsewhere to find jobs.

[Julie2122]

Originally Posted by Atlanta_BD

I'm a single black female who is about to leave Atlanta in the next few days due to my inability to find decent-paying work here. I'm moving so that I can be with family AND find work.

Now granted our situations are different. Because you make good money, you may be able to make Atlanta work for you since you will be able to afford to rent or buy a nice place, go out and do things and be able to travel to other places to meet men because of your salary. DC is high as heck so I definitely see the appeal of wanting a cheaper cost of living.

I've lived in Atlanta for nearly 20 years and I have not been able to find a husband or serious boyfriend (the men here seem to only want casual sex). In all of the years that I've lived here, only one of my black female friends has gotten married. Let other people on here tell it, I must have something wrong with me if I can't find anyone in Atlanta, but a lot of other black women I know who are attractive, successful and have great jobs in Atlanta are also single and dateless. One of my friends who has a masters degree left last year because she couldn't find a job (could never find steady work the entire time she lived here) and never went on a date in the 8 years she lived in Atlanta. The majority of my single black female friends have either left Atlanta or are making plans to leave this year all for the same reasons--no career growth and no dating opportunities. Truth be told, some of my white female friends are having the same problems also.

I don't want to give a slanted view because my experience with Atlanta in terms of dating and earning a decent salary have been negative and I can't wait to get out of here. But because you have a job already and make good money, it may be different for you. Coming here with a good-paying job gives you a bit of an advantage given that jobs are hard to come by in Atlanta. Hopefully you will be able to have a dating life.

Thank you for the feedback.

I am concerned with the dating options in Atlanta --primarily because I tend to prefer non black men and ATL primarily consist of black men.

Are you relocating to another Southern city? Best wishes w/ your upcoming move.

[Atlanta_BD]

Originally Posted by Julie2122

Thank you for the feedback.

I am concerned with the dating options in Atlanta --primarily because I tend to prefer non black men and ATL primarily consist of black men.

Are you relocating to another Southern city? Best wishes w/ your upcoming move.

I also prefer non-black men and dating has not been easy here. Though I do see black women in Atlanta in interracial relationships. I hasn't worked for me but that's not to say it won't work for you. I've seen it happen here for other women.

I'm going to Dallas, TX.

[Julie2122]

Originally Posted by Atlanta_BD

Great post, indeed! I really don't see the impetus for the OP to move here either. Especially since her family is possibly moving elsewhere to find jobs.

To be quite honest, the cost of living is a major factor. Although I do pretty well in the DC metro area, more than half of my earnings go towards housing related cost. I could elect to reside in a cheaper area within the metro, but safety and remaining close to work are important to me.

When I visit my sister, I've noticed that the housing options (in good areas) are still within a reasonable price-point. I am thinking that the extra money could be used to take additional trips outside of the country, and I'm also looking at purchasing a few investment properties in the Baltimore area. I will not be able to do this if my living expenses remain sky-high.

Also, I am interested in gaining additional skills, by working on regional related projects. I'm familiar with the "culture" of the ATL regional office and it would be a welcomed "less tense" environment, because I want to spend my non work hours, engaging in outside hobbies and interests (to remain balanced).

[Julie2122]

Originally Posted by Atlanta_BD

I also prefer non-black men and dating has not been easy here. Though I do see black women in Atlanta in interracial relationships. I hasn't worked for me but that's not to say it won't work for you. I've seen it happen here for other women.

I'm going to Dallas, TX.

Congrats, I've always enjoyed visiting Dallas. Good Luck to you!

[noah]

You might be really surprised by the diversity in Atlanta. There are literally large groups from just about every part of the world - Brazilian, Indian, Korean all have very large communities as do many others. Saying Atlanta consists mainly of black men is not accurate and if you work in a professional environment you will find that is definitely not the case.