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Old 06-18-2008, 12:16 AM
 
746 posts, read 2,894,382 times
Reputation: 248

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The following is comprehensive, and in order of obnoxiousness, but, keep, in mind, this is subjective, and others would rank these differently.....

To begin with...Numero Uno...the one uncontested worst thing about
Austin....

1.) The Traffic!!!!!!!!!

Whats worse? The road system, seemingly designed by a 4th grader who
won a contest in the American-Statesman, or the sheer mass of cars,
piled onto a road structure built at best for half the population?

2.) The Heat!

But thats simply the price you pay to live in Austin - three months of unremitting 100-degree heat......bumper sticker recently seen - "Hey, at least we're not Phoenix!"

3.) Allergies....

cough cough, sniff sniff....need I say more?

4.) Californians...

Again, need I say more?

5.) Pollution...

wait, you mean CO comes out of all those hundreds of thousands of exhaust pipes? I thought it was perfume? Must be why Austin ranked
#8 in per capita pollution....again, cough cough, sniff sniff

6.)Long stop lights ....

At one I was at last night, had time to make a sandwich, change junior's diaper, AND reload my IPOD.......

7.)No Public Transportation....

Let me get this straight...a city with over 700,000 people, and essentially NO public trans? And this in an age when we might see 6-7 dollar a gallon gas soon? To paraphrase Jim Morrison....

"This is the end, the end of Austin growth, my friend...."

8.) Texan braggadoccio....

As in, we act as if we are the only city in the history of western civ. to have a barband entertainment district, and festivals in the spring and fall..gee, you mean other cities are still working on those novel concepts?
Or another corollary....we act as if we are the only city in the world with Bohemian districts....WOW...you mean we have two or three streets with boutiques and such......man, that makes the other 95% of the sprawl way palatable!

9.) Red-state suburban republicans.....

Or, in other words, Leander, Georgetown, Round Rock, Cedar Park, et.al.
And more every day moving into Austin proper......that little liberal blop in a sea of conservatism is gettin' a whole lot smaller.....pretty soon it will be down to one street in Austin...south congress perhaps..last bastion of liberalism?

10.) Le Mans mentality drivers...

Every drive an "experience", or test of wills....tailgating....lane changing..
blocking you out so you can't get in the exit lane, out of spite.....a sense of humor helps....just realize that 100,000 people just like you moved out here and it all makes sense.....wait, oh yeah, I forgot, Austin's utopia..

11.) Humidity...

But it makes my hair look curly and fro-ish just like my senior high grad pic......

12.) Religious Zealots....

LOL! And you thought they were all in Houston and Dallas! WRONG!

13.) Too crowded...

Oh Jeez....EVERYONE wants to live here....you mean when they all come here, it creates traffic, it takes 15 minutes to go through the HEB checkout line, 101,000 people compete for the 3 jobs over 50K, and you have to pay to park anywhere within 2 miles of DT? oh, come now!

14.) College Party mentality......

Think most of the 6th street and thereabouts barricaded by construction and REAL horses every friday and sat evening....image forever bored into my brain...a kid puking while sitting on the curb in front of Ronello's pizza slice window......a classic....

15.) Male-female ratio.....
45-55.........great for women, bad for guys....so this is the one that could be a good thing if you are a female...so this should really be just a 1/2...

16.) Homeless begging EVERYWHERE........places I've seen them P-handling.....on x-way interchanges......traffic medians......festivals....
parks...DT....6th....congress.....Lamar....Mcneil. .....and on and on.......

17.)Narcissictic yuppies/hippies....people who hammer their vegan/holistic mindset onto everyone they meet.....my question..if you are that holistic, why aren't you living in an out-of-the-way commune or small city out in the boondocks, like Montana or Utah? Why choose the 16th largest city in the USA, and the fastest growing one with the 7th largest carbon footprint per capita? Or are you just here to preach to the unconverted ?

18.)The focus on UT...

heh heh...."Hook em' Horns baaaaaybeee"...heh heh.....yes, the city has a singular focus on the university sports teams, the largest city not to have a pro team.......and oh lord, does that burnt orange get old.......it does tire to see a little "shrine" in every walgreens, HEB, and whathaveyou, with all the swag....and i remember when they got a new ladies basketball coach from DUKE, and that was headline news for a week on TV...OUCH!
Keep in mind that 70% of the people you see wearing burnt orange away from UT are relocatees that oh so badly want to fit in.....yes, I still wear mine, but I have a great need to be loved.....

19.) Heart disease inducing eateries....

Hint...you want a hot job in Austin 15 years from now? You might want to get into medicine....yes, seemingly every restaurant in Austin showcases
meals that top 3000 calories or more...but oh do those BBQ'd dishes taste good.....MMMMMMMM....I can feel those scalpels rippin' my heart and aorta apart as I chew! Yummmmm!!!!! Give me some more of that!

20.) Hippies

Yes, Austin and Marin county, california are the last places on earth to sight the almost extinct Hippius Erectus.......follow the granola, whiffs of weed, and tie-die, and you might see one....but be quiet and just observe, as the species is simply lost in his own little world, not realizing that John Denver passed on 15 years ago...

21. I-35

Does this thing move? Why does it look like its perpetually stuck, with 200 trucks from mexico blowing black plumes of non-epa regulated diesel?

Last edited by scongress1234; 06-18-2008 at 12:43 AM..
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Old 06-18-2008, 12:46 AM
 
25,169 posts, read 34,385,244 times
Reputation: 6709
I don't like the college party mentality.

Every time I think of Austin I think of the 48 Hours Mystery episode called In Too Deep. I could not believe THAT actually happened in Austin, Texas! I was like about to puke when I heard the details and couldn't believe it when I first heard it. Two "college party" kids gone psycho on one of their own kind. Very sccccary.

The students and profs I've met at UT are strange and aloof to say the least. They don't seem to love Austin, imo.

Don't forget the horror stories you hear about on the Riverside area.

Otherwise your list is accurate. I hate the humidity.


Quote:
Originally Posted by scongress1234 View Post
The following is comprehensive, and in order of obnoxiousness, but, keep, in mind, this is subjective, and others would rank these differently.....

To begin with...Numero Uno...the one uncontested worst thing about
Austin....

1.) The Traffic!!!!!!!!!

Whats worse? The road system, seemingly designed by a 4th grader who
won a contest in the American-Statesman, or the sheer mass of cars,
piled onto a road structure built at best for half the population?

2.) The Heat!

But thats simply the price you pay to live in Austin - three months of unremitting 100-degree heat......bumper sticker recently seen - "Hey, at least we're not Phoenix!"

3.) Allergies....

cough cough, sniff sniff....need I say more?

4.) Californians...

Again, need I say more?

5.) Pollution...

wait, you mean CO comes out of all those hundreds of thousands of exhaust pipes? I thought it was perfume? Must be why Austin ranked
#8 in per capita pollution....again, cough cough, sniff sniff

6.)Long stop lights ....

At one I was at last night, had time to make a sandwich, change junior's diaper, AND reload my IPOD.......

7.)No Public Transportation....

Let me get this straight...a city with over 700,000 people, and essentially NO public trans? And this in an age when we might see 6-7 dollar a gallon gas soon? To paraphrase Jim Morrison....

"This is the end, the end of Austin growth, my friend...."

8.) Texan braggadoccio....

As in, we act as if we are the only city in the history of western civ. to have a barband entertainment district, and festivals in the spring and fall..gee, you mean other cities are still working on those novel concepts?
Or another corollary....we act as if we are the only city in the world with Bohemian districts....WOW...you mean we have two or three streets with boutiques and such......man, that makes the other 95% of the sprawl way palatable!

9.) Red-state suburban republicans.....

Or, in other words, Leander, Georgetown, Round Rock, Cedar Park, et.al.
And more every day moving into Austin proper......that little liberal blop in a sea of conservatism is gettin' a whole lot smaller.....pretty soon it will be down to one street in Austin...south congress perhaps..last bastion of liberalism?

10.) Le Mans mentality drivers...

Every drive an "experience", or test of wills....tailgating....lane changing..
blocking you out so you can't get in the exit lane, out of spite.....a sense of humor helps....just realize that 100,000 people just like you moved out here and it all makes sense.....wait, oh yeah, I forgot, Austin's utopia..

11.) Humidity...

But it makes my hair look curly and fro-ish just like my senior high grad pic......

12.) Religious Zealots....

LOL! And you thought they were all in Houston and Dallas! WRONG!

13.) Too crowded...

Oh Jeez....EVERYONE wants to live here....you mean when they all come here, it creates traffic, it takes 15 minutes to go through the HEB checkout line, 101,000 people compete for the 3 jobs over 50K, and you have to pay to park anywhere within 2 miles of DT? oh, come now!

14.) College Party mentality......

Think most of the 6th street and thereabouts barricaded by construction and REAL horses every friday and sat evening....image forever bored into my brain...a kid puking while sitting on the curb in front of Ronello's pizza slice window......a classic....

15.) Male-female ratio.....
45-55.........great for women, bad for guys....so this is the one that could be a good thing if you are a female...so this should really be just a 1/2...

16.) Homeless begging EVERYWHERE........places I've seen them P-handling.....on x-way interchanges......traffic medians......festivals....
parks...DT....6th....congress.....Lamar....Mcneil. .....and on and on.......

17.)Narcissictic yuppies/hippies....people who hammer their vegan/holistic mindset onto everyone they meet.....my question..if you are that holistic, why aren't you living in an out-of-the-way commune or small city out in the boondocks, like Montana or Utah? Why choose the 16th largest city in the USA, and the fastest growing one with the 7th largest carbon footprint per capita? Or are you just here to preach to the unconverted ?

18.)The focus on UT...

heh heh...."Hook em' Horns baaaaaybeee"...heh heh.....yes, the city has a singular focus on the university sports teams, the largest city not to have a pro team.......and oh lord, does that burnt orange get old.......it does tire to see a little "shrine" in every walgreens, HEB, and whathaveyou, with all the swag....and i remember when they got a new ladies basketball coach from DUKE, and that was headline news for a week on TV...OUCH!
Keep in mind that 70% of the people you see wearing burnt orange away from UT are relocatees that oh so badly want to fit in.....yes, I still wear mine, but I have a great need to be loved.....

19.) Heart disease inducing eateries....

Hint...you want a hot job in Austin 15 years from now? You might want to get into medicine....yes, seemingly every restaurant in Austin showcases
meals that top 3000 calories or more...but oh do those BBQ'd dishes taste good.....MMMMMMMM....I can feel those scalpels rippin' my heart and aorta apart as I chew! Yummmmm!!!!! Give me some more of that!

20.) Hippies

Yes, Austin and Marin county, california are the last places on earth to sight the almost extinct Hippius Erectus.......follow the granola, whiffs of weed, and tie-die, and you might see one....but be quiet and just observe, as the species is simply lost in his own little world, not realizing that John Denver passed on 15 years ago...

21. I-35

Does this thing move? Why does it look like its perpetually stuck, with 200 trucks from mexico blowing black plumes of non-epa regulated diesel?

Last edited by artsyguy; 06-18-2008 at 01:27 AM..
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Old 06-18-2008, 10:48 AM
 
Location: West Round Rock
433 posts, read 1,027,326 times
Reputation: 200
You said hippies twice.

Coming from another state where things are 25 times worse than they are here, I always chuckle when I hear people rant about how bad things are here.

Last time I checked, traffic on I-35 leaving Austin is pretty light.
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Old 06-18-2008, 10:56 AM
 
264 posts, read 650,329 times
Reputation: 126
The UT things gets "old" for people like you, but it's heaven for people like me. UT students and alumni built this city, so let's not forget that! All these people moving here need to respect that, period. Don't come here complaining about UT and how it's all you see or hear about. If you don't like it, move back to Ohio or California where your beloved team resides! This city is as good as it is because of all of us UT graduates who decided to stay and take a huge pay cut in order to live closer to UT and fellow Longhorns. This city is as educated as it is because of us. Don't forget it!
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Old 06-18-2008, 11:15 AM
 
Location: Hutto, Tx
8,642 posts, read 16,401,812 times
Reputation: 2332
Hmmm...

1. Traffic=Having lived in Houston, I'd say it's worse there. Denver also has really bad traffic on 25 and on 70 during ski season. But, yes, Austin has LOTS of traffic because it's growing so fast.

2. The heat=Doesn't really bother me. If it's too hot, I stay inside and do something. Everywhere in Texas is hot, so this is not an exclusive Austin phenomenon.

3. Allergies= Agree 100%. I'm suffering right now, even after I took a Claritan this morning. Daughter has them today too.

4. Californians= You don't need to say anymore But there are people from everywhere here, so we need to start spreading the love

5. Pollution= What place doesn't have any at all? I don't think this is the worst place for it, but we could do better.

6. Longest Traffic Lights= That really was funny! You really could do all those things and sometimes more, as long as some lights around here are

7. No public transportation= I'll agree here too. And they need to really expand it. The little bitty short hop that they have now is no good to very many people at all. There was a story on the news today about Denver, Charlotte, and Portland and how they are investing millions into their public transportation plans. When I left Denver, they had plans for branches all around the city and suburbs. A friend of ours from there was down a few weeks ago and said all those lines are running and they are putting up more now. We are laughably behind on this.

8. You should have said Austin bragging. I'm getting a sneaking suspicion that this is a relatively new trend brought by transplants. Even before I lived in the area, while in Houston I knew people in Austin, had friends who went to college here and never heard bragging about the city like I do nowadays.

9. Republicans=since I tend to be one I don't think we're all bad. But I will say that too many of one type in a place can be a bad thing, either party. I think a balanced mix is the best thing.

10. Le Mans mentality drivers= spot on with this one.

11. Humidity= My husband has curly hair. He would disagree with your statement about the curlier the better. I, on the other hand, think it's great for the skin. My skin did not like the dry air in Denver.

12. Religious Zealots= I really don't think Austin has many zealots. Houston, parts of East Texas, and parts North around Waco and such do.

13. Too crowded=and will continue to get even more crowded.

14. College party mentality=There are lots of colleges in the area. This mentality is great when you're 18-20ish. Not so great once you outgrow it, but by then hopefully you have found something else you like to do better and found different places to patronize.

15. male/female ratio= I'm not single so for me doesn't matter

16. Homeless begging everywhere=I'm not one who thinks this is such a great thing either.

17. narcissistic yuppies/hippies= Another great one! Love it

18. The focus on UT= This is just one of those things that is quintessentially Austin. It always has been. You could buck the trend by rooting for no College Sports, or start rooting for a different college team like Rice or A&M. There are actually quite a few A&M fans out here. My neighbor is one of them.

19. Heart disease inducing eateries=you're one of those narcissistic hippy vegetarians aren't you? I will not apologize for loving southern style fat and grease. Actually bbq is no fattening (if you keep off the sauce) and don't eat a plate that is heaped up higher than you are tall. Did you see the thing about Chicken fried bacon? (Or did you post that).

20. Hippies=cute Houston and Galveston also have a lot of them.

21. I 35= I just try and avoid it if I can. Rick Perry and Bush just love those unregulated trucks blowing who knows what everywhere. My husband really hates this and can rant for hours on this.
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Old 06-18-2008, 11:17 AM
 
Location: Leander, TX
17 posts, read 53,397 times
Reputation: 14
Well I am moving from Virginia Beach to Austin and I have lived in several other large cities. I think you just described most large cities in the US. You haven't felt humidity until you lived in a southern state right on the boarder of water. Check it out and let me know what you think of Austin humidity then.
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Old 06-18-2008, 12:31 PM
 
2,226 posts, read 5,800,825 times
Reputation: 890
Quote:
Originally Posted by cllane5104 View Post
Well I am moving from Virginia Beach to Austin and I have lived in several other large cities. I think you just described most large cities in the US. You haven't felt humidity until you lived in a southern state right on the boarder of water. Check it out and let me know what you think of Austin humidity then.
Just got back on Saturday from Virginia Beach and I thought it was rather pleasant!
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Old 06-18-2008, 01:35 PM
 
746 posts, read 2,894,382 times
Reputation: 248
Quote:
Originally Posted by pbnj07 View Post
You said hippies twice.

Coming from another state where things are 25 times worse than they are here, I always chuckle when I hear people rant about how bad things are here.

Last time I checked, traffic on I-35 leaving Austin is pretty light.
light on I-35? Now that's funny! BTW, this list was supposed to be a joke.....
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Old 06-18-2008, 01:36 PM
 
746 posts, read 2,894,382 times
Reputation: 248
Quote:
Originally Posted by AustinTexan View Post
The UT things gets "old" for people like you, but it's heaven for people like me. UT students and alumni built this city, so let's not forget that! All these people moving here need to respect that, period. Don't come here complaining about UT and how it's all you see or hear about. If you don't like it, move back to Ohio or California where your beloved team resides! This city is as good as it is because of all of us UT graduates who decided to stay and take a huge pay cut in order to live closer to UT and fellow Longhorns. This city is as educated as it is because of us. Don't forget it!
Yeah, Hook em horns, dude! (SHHHESHHH!, rolls eyes)
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Old 06-18-2008, 01:39 PM
 
746 posts, read 2,894,382 times
Reputation: 248
Quote:
Originally Posted by love roses View Post
Hmmm...

1. Traffic=Having lived in Houston, I'd say it's worse there. Denver also has really bad traffic on 25 and on 70 during ski season. But, yes, Austin has LOTS of traffic because it's growing so fast.

2. The heat=Doesn't really bother me. If it's too hot, I stay inside and do something. Everywhere in Texas is hot, so this is not an exclusive Austin phenomenon.

3. Allergies= Agree 100%. I'm suffering right now, even after I took a Claritan this morning. Daughter has them today too.

4. Californians= You don't need to say anymore But there are people from everywhere here, so we need to start spreading the love

5. Pollution= What place doesn't have any at all? I don't think this is the worst place for it, but we could do better.

6. Longest Traffic Lights= That really was funny! You really could do all those things and sometimes more, as long as some lights around here are

7. No public transportation= I'll agree here too. And they need to really expand it. The little bitty short hop that they have now is no good to very many people at all. There was a story on the news today about Denver, Charlotte, and Portland and how they are investing millions into their public transportation plans. When I left Denver, they had plans for branches all around the city and suburbs. A friend of ours from there was down a few weeks ago and said all those lines are running and they are putting up more now. We are laughably behind on this.

8. You should have said Austin bragging. I'm getting a sneaking suspicion that this is a relatively new trend brought by transplants. Even before I lived in the area, while in Houston I knew people in Austin, had friends who went to college here and never heard bragging about the city like I do nowadays.

9. Republicans=since I tend to be one I don't think we're all bad. But I will say that too many of one type in a place can be a bad thing, either party. I think a balanced mix is the best thing.

10. Le Mans mentality drivers= spot on with this one.

11. Humidity= My husband has curly hair. He would disagree with your statement about the curlier the better. I, on the other hand, think it's great for the skin. My skin did not like the dry air in Denver.

12. Religious Zealots= I really don't think Austin has many zealots. Houston, parts of East Texas, and parts North around Waco and such do.

13. Too crowded=and will continue to get even more crowded.

14. College party mentality=There are lots of colleges in the area. This mentality is great when you're 18-20ish. Not so great once you outgrow it, but by then hopefully you have found something else you like to do better and found different places to patronize.

15. male/female ratio= I'm not single so for me doesn't matter

16. Homeless begging everywhere=I'm not one who thinks this is such a great thing either.

17. narcissistic yuppies/hippies= Another great one! Love it

18. The focus on UT= This is just one of those things that is quintessentially Austin. It always has been. You could buck the trend by rooting for no College Sports, or start rooting for a different college team like Rice or A&M. There are actually quite a few A&M fans out here. My neighbor is one of them.

19. Heart disease inducing eateries=you're one of those narcissistic hippy vegetarians aren't you? I will not apologize for loving southern style fat and grease. Actually bbq is no fattening (if you keep off the sauce) and don't eat a plate that is heaped up higher than you are tall. Did you see the thing about Chicken fried bacon? (Or did you post that).

20. Hippies=cute Houston and Galveston also have a lot of them.

21. I 35= I just try and avoid it if I can. Rick Perry and Bush just love those unregulated trucks blowing who knows what everywhere. My husband really hates this and can rant for hours on this.
Again, this is a joke folks....Austin is a great place. If we can't laugh at outselves, somethings wrong...
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