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Old 03-11-2012, 06:17 PM
 
Location: Overland Park, KS
43 posts, read 63,804 times
Reputation: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by greenpapayas View Post
I will give you a scenario here. I went to this place called Havana in Cambridge which is a salsa club y'day and tried to dance there. Now, when I approach a few women to dance, they instantly turn me down or look the other way round sometimes walking away from me. If you think this is because I am a stranger, I have seen people who were strangers approach them the very next second and they would be all over them grinding their a** and what not.

You decide here if it was my personality or the fact that I belong to a race they consider "undateable", how did they get to know the personality of the stranger in a split second to be better than mine???
Again, women not wanting to date you or dance with you doesn't mean they're racist. I've never been hit on by an Asian man in the 15+ times I've been to NYC, but that doesn't mean all Asian men in Queens hate black women.

They make their decisions based on the short time they spend with you. No, they don't get to know the entirety of your personality nor do they get to know that stranger completely, either. But the fact they didn't choose to go on a real date with you doesn't mean they considered you "undateable". They could have liked you but just liked another man more, or something along those lines. Either way, someone choosing not to date is not necessarily a bad reflection on you.
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Old 03-16-2012, 12:17 PM
 
44 posts, read 6,175 times
Reputation: 61
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Originally Posted by lrfox View Post
Chicago still has the fourth highest GDP on Earth. It's the third biggest economy in the U.S. (behind NYC and LA) and its GDP is bigger than Boston's by more than $200 Billion. Even with a population decline, Chicago (and its metro area which is growing) is still a hell of a lot larger than Boston. Internationally, Chicago is more well known than Boston and rightfully so.
Chicago's GDP is not $200B bigger than Boston. Boston CSA versus Chicago CSA is about $100B difference. You act like you are comparing apples to oranges but these regions rank right next to each other nationally. SF-SJ area actually ranks higher.

2010 Combined Statistical Area Gross Product, Released Sept 13, 2011

5. Chicago-Naperville-Michigan City, IL-IN-WI CSA $539.046 Billion
Chicago-Naperville-Joliet, IL-IN-WI Metro Area $532,331
Kankakee-Bradley, IL Metro Area $3,150
Michigan City-La Porte, IN Metro Area $3,565

6. Boston-Worcester-Manchester, MA-RI-NH CSA $430.245 Billion
Boston-Cambridge-Quincy, MA-NH Metro Area $313,690
Concord, NH Micro Area
Manchester-Nashua, NH Metro Area $20,988
Providence-New Bedford-Fall River, RI-MA Metro Area $66,334
Worcester, MA Metro Area $29,233
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Old 03-16-2012, 03:35 PM
 
839 posts, read 450,048 times
Reputation: 424
Quote:
Originally Posted by greenpapayas View Post
Boston is just a redneck town where each and every person that's a minority is only a stereotype.
You think Boston is a redneck town? Have you ever been to Roxbury, Dorchester, Mattapan? Yeah, Boston is very redneck.
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Old 03-21-2012, 10:30 PM
 
772 posts, read 472,601 times
Reputation: 628
Quote:
Originally Posted by lrfox View Post
I agree. I'm an architecture geek and I was floored by my first few visits to Chicago. It's strikingly beautiful and rich from an architectural standpoint (from Gothic to Deco to modern architecture).



Oh I agree with you. I love San Francisco, but I couldn't live there. It's just that there's so much for first time visitors. As corny as it sounds, a first visit to SF can be magical. But if you're there on business, walking by the bums on Market Street (they have a worse homeless problem than I've seen anywhere in the US) or waking up to 50 degrees and clouds every day in August, it probably gets old. There's an aura of "Smug" (South Park touched on this brilliantly) in San Francisco that's kind of off-putting as well. As a tourist though, it's easy to look past all of that for a short while at least.

Chicago is an architectural paradise !!! Over many decades, I've been all over the U.S. and lived or stayed for extended times in many of those cities mentioned above and Chicago is likely the most visually attractive and striking city I've ever seen (maybe even more so than New York City . . . or they are at least on relative par with one another). For a lifelong lover of architecture and environmental design (though that is not my profession but rather an avocation), Chicago is a feast for the eyes and senses. In this sense, Chicago is #1.
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Old 03-21-2012, 10:58 PM
 
772 posts, read 472,601 times
Reputation: 628
Quote:
Originally Posted by Finocchio View Post
Boston often goes unmentioned when listing great American cities since it intimidates many in other parts of the country. Recall we're the most European-like of all American cities and we have the best learning instiutions this side of Great Britain. My suspicion is that many are intimidated by Boston and the historic role it played in the independence of these United States. No other city can make that claim (except, perhaps to a lesser degree, Philadelphia).

Earlier in this thread, varied persons have mentioned San Francisco's "smugness". Well, there is a very strong perception around the rest of the U.S. (and the world) about Boston being the "intellectual center of the world" and the "land of the intelligentia" (definition of "intelligentia": the intellectual élite of a society, the intellectuals, the professional classes). It has all these many most-prestigious, most-prominent, most-highly-selective institutions of higher education and is a world center for research, development, culture, finance, the arts, etc. etc. etc. and we are a city, metro area and region of so many historical firsts for the U.S. and even for the world . . . . and THAT is, to varying degrees, offputting to many other persons around the U.S. and the world. In other words, these other persons who are variably offput by the image of Boston feel some sense of inferiority in relation to us and assume that we are filled with socioeconomically class-conscious snobs and elite-minded persons who think of themselves as "the best and the brightest" at everything they do (whether actually true or not, this is how the resident population of the Boston CMSA is most often perceived by many outsiders who feel that they themsevles don't quite "measure up" to this level of achievement or prominence or life accomplishment). They feel that we all "look down our noses" at them in a condescending way and think of ourselves as the "creme de la creme" or the "elite" and they as lesser beings than us.

And, often times, I have personally found that we Bostonians DO have that air of elitism or superiority or hyper-class-consciousness or arrogance about us that these other outisde people or visitors perceive (not universally nor with every member of our population, of course . . . but enough-so so that, over the generations, we have developed that perception or reputation in the minds of many others).
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Old 03-21-2012, 11:19 PM
 
772 posts, read 472,601 times
Reputation: 628
Quote:
Originally Posted by mdovell View Post
I don't think it intimidates other parts of the country. We have a higher cost of living and for the most part there isn't that much to show for it (weather, bad roads, lack of space etc)

I don't know if we'd be the most European like of all American cities...if you include the whole continent. I'd argue Montreal is. There's also the argument of what would be good about European to start with.

I'd say the region as a metropolitan area has the most learning institutions. "Best" depends on so many metrics. I don't think there are that many schools that can be the best in all subjects but for a given subject is more likely. Since degrees have majors this fits. Same with hospitals. Usually people go to hospitals for a given part of the body and want to see a specialist, therefore a more general hospital (no pun intended) is not optimal.

We cannot really intimidate since our representation has shrank considerable over the past 30 years. it isn't even a political argument it is a population growth issue.

Boston cannot support the whole state. Central and western mass needs to be developed more. When wifi is more common than free samples of tide in the mail in academic circles and yet the berkshires still runs on dialup something is wrong.



It is my view that, when Finocchio speaks of "intimidation", he or she means that we (those residing in the Boston CMSA) have a long-standing perception by many outsiders of being mostly populated by "the best and the brightest" and the "elites" in virtually every field or every other field of human endeavor; that we have the most-selective and prestigious institutions of higher education and a multitude of them (along with other prominent-enough institutions in their own right to complement these mentioned "most prestigious" schools). And a perception that the Boston CMSA is filled with a mostly affluent, socioeconomically and culturally class-conscious population who, to varying degrees, have an "elite" air about them (i.e., a view that "WE ARE THE BEST & YOU'RE NOT!"), a population which exudes "SUCCESS" in everything it does. THIS is what outsiders (or at least some outsiders) are "intimidated" by. It feeds into their own insecurities and sense of "not measuring up" and makes them feel "inadequate" and therefore, perhaps as a defense mechanism (as Sigmund Freud would refer to it), they label us with the label of "snobs" or "the elite" and other similar characterizations. It is how some people deal with their own insecurities about their own standing and level-of-acoomplishment in life (or lack thereof).
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Old 03-22-2012, 12:09 AM
 
772 posts, read 472,601 times
Reputation: 628
Quote:
Originally Posted by greenpapayas View Post
1) 25
2) Indian
3) I think almost all places are the same, they seem to hate people like me
4) As I mentioned in another post of mine, I am not a light skinned Indian guy and Indian women don't date or go for darker skinned Indian men, so none of them would want to do anything with me.

Sometimes I am a bit whining though I have to accept that. One of my friends says I am like a nagging housewife at times


I am a Caucasian male of Jewish background and my best friend in the entire world (for 25 years now and counting . . . and he even serves as the appointed executor of my will and estate) is an Asian Indian (from southern India, whose family speaks Telegu) and he lives in the Boston metro area. And he can truly, truly be said to be the world's ultimate ladies man. And he has always been this way (in all the 25 years I've known him thus far . . . and I'm sure even well before that). It seems as though the entire female half of the human species wants to be with this man (though he is not seeking any woman now, having been married for 14 years per this writing . . . to a non-Indian beautiful woman). Everywhere he goes, women of all types fawn & go gaga over him (being drawn to him like honey attracts bees). It is not just his looks (tall and long shoulder-length haired, with a middling somewhat darker complexion and nice smile and features) but as well his personality, his social skills, his comfort level with people at-large (both male and female), his understanding of how to make a woman feel like a woman, and to make all people (even males) seek out his company or friendship or camaraderie or relationship. In other words, he has the entire package deal going for him in terms of how he carries himself and behaves and therefore how he is perceived by others. He is wholly socially successful (more so than I). And he has a completely Indian-sounding first and last name and looks foreign (though he speaks perfect English, like a native born-and-raised American would . . . coming to this country not speaking any English yet taking it upon himself to immerse himself in this culture and know it inside-and-out and therefore mastering the English language, idioms and culture like a native born-and-raised American). He attracts EVERY type and level of woman (even the most attractive, appealing, and accomplished or successful . . . along with everyone else) as well as many men wanting to befriend him and know him.

So, my friend, it IS possible to be an Asian Indian with an Indian name, background, and looks (and his parents were Hindus and very dark-skinned . . . and his sister is very dark-skinned and lives in the Boston area and is very socially active and connected herself, and is married to a white Southerner from Georgia). His entire family maintains their full Indian names (instead of Americanizing or Anglicizing them to American-like names like Bob or Diane or whatever).

Last edited by UsAll; 03-22-2012 at 12:21 AM..
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Old 03-23-2012, 03:30 PM
 
643 posts, read 772,872 times
Reputation: 586
Quote:
Originally Posted by ipoetry View Post
Oh please! My husband is a transplant from Ohio, Dutch of all things, and he's very much a Bostonian. Maybe you need to up your confidence level and get out there and embrace the city.
Are you realizing in hindsight that your reply (about your dutch husband) does absolutely nothing to refute the post that you're quoting?
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Old 03-23-2012, 03:41 PM
 
643 posts, read 772,872 times
Reputation: 586
Quote:
Originally Posted by UsAll View Post
It is my view that, when Finocchio speaks of "intimidation", he or she means that we (those residing in the Boston CMSA) have a long-standing perception by many outsiders of being mostly populated by "the best and the brightest" and the "elites" in virtually every field or every other field of human endeavor; that we have the most-selective and prestigious institutions of higher education and a multitude of them (along with other prominent-enough institutions in their own right to complement these mentioned "most prestigious" schools). And a perception that the Boston CMSA is filled with a mostly affluent, socioeconomically and culturally class-conscious population who, to varying degrees, have an "elite" air about them (i.e., a view that "WE ARE THE BEST & YOU'RE NOT!"), a population which exudes "SUCCESS" in everything it does. THIS is what outsiders (or at least some outsiders) are "intimidated" by. It feeds into their own insecurities and sense of "not measuring up" and makes them feel "inadequate" and therefore, perhaps as a defense mechanism (as Sigmund Freud would refer to it), they label us with the label of "snobs" or "the elite" and other similar characterizations. It is how some people deal with their own insecurities about their own standing and level-of-acoomplishment in life (or lack thereof).
Well stated. We've been in New England for a few years now having moved from Chicago, and Boston is now on our short list of upcoming relocation cities. When discussing Boston, variations on this theme (as aptly described by UsAll) come up in nearly every conversation. Elitism, regardless of how well-founded or credentialed it might be, is still considered a social stigma in American culture. It easily and quickly morphs into perceptions of rudeness and "cold" indifference. Boston might be quaint in many of its physical attributes but its population is oft reputed to be -- quite simply -- "mean".

I would only disagree that people are intimidated by Boston. Few people don't have a strong opinion about Boston. I know a lot of people (I'm orginally from Seattle and lived in DC, Chicago and Charlotte) who absolutely hate Boston, none of whom are "intimidated" by it. I also know many who like it just fine -- and a few who love it with a passion. It's a city that brings out strong and mixed opinions in almost any dialogue.
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Old 03-23-2012, 08:04 PM
 
772 posts, read 472,601 times
Reputation: 628
Quote:
(Originally Posted by UsAll)
It is my view that, when Finocchio speaks of "intimidation", he or she means that we (those residing in the Boston CMSA) have a long-standing perception by many outsiders of being mostly populated by "the best and the brightest" and the "elites" in virtually every field or every other field of human endeavor; that we have the most-selective and prestigious institutions of higher education and a multitude of them (along with other prominent-enough institutions in their own right to complement these mentioned "most prestigious" schools). And a perception that the Boston CMSA is filled with a mostly affluent, socioeconomically and culturally class-conscious population who, to varying degrees, have an "elite" air about them (i.e., a view that "WE ARE THE BEST & YOU'RE NOT!"), a population which exudes "SUCCESS" in everything it does. THIS is what outsiders (or at least some outsiders) are "intimidated" by. It feeds into their own insecurities and sense of "not measuring up" and makes them feel "inadequate" and therefore, perhaps as a defense mechanism (as Sigmund Freud would refer to it), they label us with the label of "snobs" or "the elite" and other similar characterizations. It is how some people deal with their own insecurities about their own standing and level-of-acoomplishment in life (or lack thereof).
(Quote by Sunday1 in response to the above posting by UsAll): "Well stated. We've been in New England for a few years now having moved from Chicago, and Boston is now on our short list of upcoming relocation cities. When discussing Boston, variations on this theme (as aptly described by UsAll) come up in nearly every conversation. Elitism, regardless of how well-founded or credentialed it might be, is still considered a social stigma in American culture. It easily and quickly morphs into perceptions of rudeness and "cold" indifference. Boston might be quaint in many of its physical attributes but its population is oft reputed to be -- quite simply -- "mean". I would only disagree that people are intimidated by Boston. Few people don't have a strong opinion about Boston. I know a lot of people (I'm orginally from Seattle and lived in DC, Chicago and Charlotte) who absolutely hate Boston, none of whom are "intimidated" by it. I also know many who like it just fine -- and a few who love it with a passion. It's a city that brings out strong and mixed opinions in almost any dialogue." <End of quote>


(The latest response by UsAll to the above quote by Sunday1):
Even with what I said above -- about how some people may deal with their own insecurities about their own standing and level-of-acomplishment in life (or lack thereof) by labeling others, such as the population of the greater Boston CMSA, as "snobs" or "the elite":

It has come to be my view, though (having myself lived in the Boston CMSA for 20 years & counting thus far, and having visited multiple times over the decades before ever moving here [being from New York City originally]), that EVEN I MYSELF have found enough of the "elite" air or the "we are better than you" attitude amongst a significant-enough proportion of the Boston CMSA's population-at-large to make an impression upon me (i.e., not amongst the working classes and lower socioeconomic classes here but certainly amongst the professional classes and the affluent element-at-large . . . which admittedly is a significantly-sized element in the Boston CMSA). That is, I myself have often enough sensed this prevailing sense of what I will call here a tangible and clear sense or air of "CLASS CONSCIOUSNESS", for lack of a better word or phrase that I can think of at the moment (whether it is stated outright or just hinted at or exuded in the behavior patterns of these just-described professional and affluent segments of the larger population here). Admittedly, people exemplifying such an attitude, outlook and demeanor can be found in ANY city, metro area, region or state . . . BUT we in the Boston CMSA have an especially higher degree or prevalence of such people than I have found elsewhere in the U.S. (and note that I myself have traveled and lived over much of the U.S. over the past 4+ decades). It is like I sense or can tell that it REALLY, REALLY matters to these particular segments of our population such things as:

(1) Where you went to school (a college or university and not a trade school or vo-tech school or community college or high school-only)

(2) How promiment or prestigious said school was

(3) How high in degree level you achieved (bachelors, masters, PhD, post-doctoral) <==== ASSOCIATE DEGREE-ONLY HOLDERS NEED NOT APPLY, FOR INSTANCE

(4) How high a level-of-accomplishment you have in life-at-large thus far and for your age/generation

(5) How well or not so well you live (i.e., what can they see that will impress them)

(6) What socioeconomic strata you are or are perceived to be a part of (i.e., where in the social pecking order you are or are not)

(7) How much expendable income you have or are perceived to have

(8) What type of job position you hold, with whom, how impressive is it, what title you have (or how successful you are as a self-employed person)

(9) How "hip" or "cool" or "with it" or "socially connected" or "socially successful" you are or are not

(10) How upwardly-mobile you are or are not

and other such concerns. That is, an individual can still come across as rather intelligent or intelligent-enough and reasonably socially-skilled (or at least seemingly so) & even put on a good or good-enough appearance . . . YET, to these particular segments of our population, if said individual doesn't have the proper credentials ("sheepskins") or status symbols to show for it (e.g., your masters or doctoral degree and not just from any school but from a highly-ranked promiment institution such as Harvard or Columbia or the University of Chicago or UCLA or UC Berkeley or some medical school, being able to say that you live in a upscale neighborhood or suburb or otherwise have the impressive housing, transportation and other material trappings to show for it, an impressive-enough job title, an impressive-enough address, etc. etc. etc.), then I have experienced and seen enough times that you are often looked down upon or shunned to varying degrees. They might (or might not) show some middling or passing degree of politeness (or at least initially) but they will often-enough NOT choose to consort or associate with you on an ongoing basis (if they can otherwise avoid it). Such persons would rather not consort with people who have, for instance, had a challenging life or a life of difficulties (to whatever degree) or whose life (in general) does not exude "success", "accomplishment", "prominence", et al through-and-through in nearly everything in life that you have endeavored to or pursued.

So, in summary, what I am saying is that this "elite" or "the best & the brightest" or this "we are better than you" attitude or air that outsiders perceive (i.e., those outside of the greater Boston CMSA) that Boston-at-large represents to them does not appear to be wholly unfounded or at least to an intelligent, perceptive and intellectually-honest person like myself (though one can always find exceptions to this pattern). That is, it is not altogether a wholly-unfair stereotype that is affixed to us (Bostonians) by them (non-Bostonians); it DOES have a foundation which arises out of real-life experience (not simply arising only out of their own insecurities about themselves).

Last edited by UsAll; 03-23-2012 at 08:50 PM..
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