Why am I so hesitant/nervous? (Boston, Florida: relocate, apartment, job)

[Lior Arel]

I used to work in Boston; commuted in from Providence and I LOVED it! Always wanted to find a way to move into the city itself.

A little over four years ago I moved to Tampa with my (now) ex-boyfriend. The only thing I like here is the winter weather and the palm trees! I want to move, more culture, better opportunity, etc.

Can someone explain to me why I am hesitant and even downright scared to move back to New England and Boston in particular? I just don't get it. I can see myself with a great place in the South End, riding the T to get to work. I miss all the culture and history and Irish pride (I'm Scottish ancestry, but you know how we appreciate each other ).

What's with the trepidation??

[LeavingMA]

I think it is normal for people to be scared of something different or new. You get so used to a certain lifestyle, whether your completely content with it or not...but we are still creatures of habit in many ways.

It takes everyone a little while to get acclimated to something different.

[Debi1957]

Hey....get in line kiddo! I am a Florida native and with any grace at all, we will be leaving here and moving to Mass very soon! I think the older you get, even by just a few years, anything new, or uprooting, is a little nerve racking. Just go...get out of Florida...you cannot imagine what a smart move that is!!! If you are nervous, go to Normandy Farms campground. You can do a work camper program and live there for free and only work like 20 hours a week. Most campgrounds offer this, but Normandy farms is wonderful....it is a resort! I think you will do just fine and I cannot wait to join you. After 51 years here (Florida) and the changes we have seen, my bags are packed and we are just waiting for either his company to say, yep, come on up, or retirement in 3 years or less....get me outta here...good luck to you and please, please go! you are doing the right thing!

[LCT]

Moving is supposed to be one of the major stress factors in one's life, right up there with divorce and death.

You didn't say your age, how long ago you broke up with your boyfriend of if he was also from the RI/MA area. Is he a factor?

You've just spent 4 years of your life in Tampa; that's a reasonably long time. It's natural to be a little nervous leaving what is now familiar and routine. You're probably wondering if Boston will still be the same, will you reconnect with old friends or have to make all new ones, etc. I'm sure you realize that in the 4 years you've been away, the city will look different at first.

You're basically going to start all over: new job, new apartment, new friends, new city, etc., plus a new, improved and more mature you!

If you didn't have a little hesitation, I'd be worried that you were naive or very immature.

Best of Luck! If you really, really want to relocate, make a game-plan and just do it. If you get a move on, you can start 2008 here!

[Lior Arel]

Thanks. You all have clarified it and I feel better now.

I'm hoping for Spring next year (I want just one more winter in Florida).

[beachlady58]

VictoryTampa:
I understand your feelings! I am here in MA and love the area - but LOVE warm weather. I go crazy in the winter. Hubbie got great job offer for Tampa this summer and after analyzing everything I just could not do it...now that it is cold I wish I had...anyway - change is stressful and just go with it. There is much more "culture" here - but along with that goes blizzards, snow and cold weather.

[LeavingMA]

I have a friend who did the opposite. She moved from the Boston area to Tampa. So far she really enjoys it. She didn't like be stuck inside during the winter up in MA and was upset with the way a lot of things were going. She seems to be really happy in Tampa right now.

You can always go back if it doesn't work out. That is the attitude my friend took when moving.

[smarty]

If you have a safety net, you will not have as much anxiety.

If you have a loving parent or sibling who will take you in if you fail... there will be less pressure.