Do you find Bostonians to be friendly-or cold people? (Quincy: movies, public schools)

[HeadedWest]

Originally Posted by hwynym

The natives have no problem making the friends they want to have.

No outsiders need apply.

[meltinjohn]

Ok Im gonna finally throw my 2 cents in.
I am from Massachusetts born and raised. I didnt appreciate MA when I was leaving ok, I finally leave and then realize its much worse other places and I think people complaining about it now will see that when they do leave the Boston area.
I moved to PA for a yr and that was a god awful place (2 hrs from Pittsburgh too not Philly!!).
I moved to FL after and been there for over 4. I so wanna get outta there too.
I find in Tampa Bay (yes Rays country) that many are friendly since theres transplants (kinda like how Dallas was described by someone else or Atlanta), but some people are also real stupid there and weather and the constant sunshine KILLS ME!! It is not a pedestrian friendly area in the least.
I think St Pete if your in the downtown area and walk a little further out is very pedestrian friendly with some Boston people living there also and NY but most of the area is for car culture. For a smaller city, the homeless rate is high in St Pete but an overall cool town and can get parking anytimes of the day but still want back in Boston nonetheless.
Also this cold and aloof city bit people talk about, yes it does exist but it isnt always to the extreme at all. I think people can get short if you ask them for directions but all I gotta say is prepare it to be ruder and it will turn out better for you I think. That seems like the way it goes.
The only thing returning to Boston I am looking at as paradise is hearing Boston accents regularly + the 4 seasons. Otherwise, it is no utopia and do expect people to be rude and then, it has no choice but to be better since you risen to that city challenge to expect it to be kinda rude.
Its all in preparation I find.
Anyways, when people talk about Boston, guess what place comes to mind peoplewise only on a more polite scale? Portland OR.
I was in Portland, loved the city and found it to be similar to Boston only with drivers letting you by on a regular basis and stopping for you and never honking. The reverse there is the bike riders can be very radical and attack drivers like how that can happen with road rage in Boston only the reverse in Portland with left wing crazies riding bikes.
The similarities to Boston tho are quite similar but the Rose Garden is in a nicer setup than the Garden is. Transit in Portland is one of the tops. Picture it a Boston with more hippie weirdos and left wing people and environmentalists (like Vermont and Boston into 1) and pot and hash friendly city to the highest with more homeless even.
The chinatown there is a joke tho and the pizza isnt that good.
Boston and Portland are my top 2 places I wanna pick from on the whole. Also Portland has city snobbery to a degree like Boston can and natives will defend their city to death.
Portlanders are also friendly but can be cold and if you meet a friend there, its more or less for life kinda similarly to how Boston is. Their like that not as rude as Boston but definitely not southern style friendly either.
Also out there, liberals vs conservatives in the big battle vs the black and Whites in boston. Conservatives get TONS of **** there sometimes.

[alexanderaf]

Allow me to get flamed since I have to get this out...

I haven't been to Boston yet, so I have a question...if everywhere you go, people around you don't acknowledge you, keep their eyes away, and completely ignore you except to get around you, how does that make you feel? Like a ghost?

I just have a hard time understanding how that would not be awkward? For example, how can you sit next to someone on a flight and never introduce yourself to the person next to you? I'd feel like everywhere I go I would just be 'in the way' and that would keep me from wanting to go anywhere at all?

And all this about pointless small talk, and how you would rather be doing something else when 'trapped' in a conversation? If you are respectful or patient enough to join in, you'd be surprised you may actually have a meaningful conversation. Every now and then you may learn something, or gain the pleasure of knowing someone else out there acknowledges you. If I'm interacting with the people around me, I feel like I'm home even if I'm far away. Is Boston really that bad?

[Geography Freak]

Originally Posted by alexanderaf

Allow me to get flamed since I have to get this out...

I haven't been to Boston yet, so I have a question...if everywhere you go, people around you don't acknowledge you, keep their eyes away, and completely ignore you except to get around you, how does that make you feel? Like a ghost?

I just have a hard time understanding how that would not be awkward? For example, how can you sit next to someone on a flight and never introduce yourself to the person next to you? I'd feel like everywhere I go I would just be 'in the way' and that would keep me from wanting to go anywhere at all?

And all this about pointless small talk, and how you would rather be doing something else when 'trapped' in a conversation? If you are respectful or patient enough to join in, you'd be surprised you may actually have a meaningful conversation. Every now and then you may learn something, or gain the pleasure of knowing someone else out there acknowledges you. If I'm interacting with the people around me, I feel like I'm home even if I'm far away. Is Boston really that bad?

Well, I must say I never introduce myself to my seat neighbour on a flight. I just say "Hi", help them with their hand luggage if they're a woman and their luggage is heavy, but that's about it. Of course if we strike a conversation I would say "By the way, I'm Geography Freak", but I don't introduce myself beforehand. I would feel I'm being intrusive.

[dem3456]

Originally Posted by Geography Freak

I would feel I'm being intrusive.

I just wanted to clarify something that I posted earlier using the statement above.

I said that I like the fact that people from Boston can be cold and unfriendly and I proceeded to say that it didn't matter to me whether people said hi to me in public or acknowledged me and I wasn't going to do that to other people either.

Just judging from people's reactions, I don't think my point got across very well. To correct it, I agree with Geography Freak that I also would feel intrusive if I was to strike up a conversation with someone who I did not know. I think being "cold" is just a way to avoid awkwardness that comes when talking to a stranger. Or at least thats how I look at it. If someone tries to strike up a conversation with me, I'm not going to be reciprocating not because I love to be rude but because I don't feel comfortable. I think thats just more of the culture here than elsewhere.

Also, I'm more of an introverted person in any case, so maybe that explains my reluctance to be friendly in public. I've been told by many people that when I'm in public, I look extremely angry and/or disgusted about something, when really, I'm not angry at all.

[holden125]

Originally Posted by dem3456

Also, I'm more of an introverted person in any case, so maybe that explains my reluctance to be friendly in public. I've been told by many people that when I'm in public, I look extremely angry and/or disgusted about something, when really, I'm not angry at all.

I've spent most of my life in the Boston area, New York City, or DC, and I have been told the exact same thing, and I'm also not angry at all.

People I know have told me that they wouldn't approach me for directions. Though for some reason a lot of strangers do approach me for directions, even in places where I've never lived. Maybe I've just perfected looking like I know where I'm going.

[Geography Freak]

Originally Posted by holden125

I've spent most of my life in the Boston area, New York City, or DC, and I have been told the exact same thing, and I'm also not angry at all.

People I know have told me that they wouldn't approach me for directions. Though for some reason a lot of strangers do approach me for directions, even in places where I've never lived. Maybe I've just perfected looking like I know where I'm going.

Every single word on this post applies to me.

[charmingdev]

I was raised in Tulsa where I now live but I have lived in Boston and Atlanta. Bostonians are just not very friendly or social but are very suspicious. New Yorkers from my visits are blunt but very social.
But I would also agree with charolastra00 that I don't particularly like the forced friendliness that some people feel obliged to show because of local custom. I don't mind a head nod or a "hello" when I am walking down the street but keep it at that if we are strangers. I think there is a tendency for Bostonians to not even recognize people's existence.

[Missmoose]

Raised in NYC, lived all around the Northeast. Boston is just the worst. Unfriendly, racist, bigoted. Oddly, somewhat less angry in the suburbs.

I'm glad for the people who enjoy it here, but I cannot wait to get out.

Don't use the laws as any type of cue to the people, there is a peculiar disconnect. Politically liberal, socially .

[CasebyCase]

Well I've lived here for 10 years, from the south, so take this how you wish, but I find people here to be pretty aloof. However, I do think in certain neighborhoods once you are visible, you become quite friendly with your neighbors.