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Old 12-11-2007, 10:39 AM
 
82 posts, read 261,638 times
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I'm a Boston native, but have lived everywhere-NH, CT, TX, MI, IL, CA, Canada and Australia- So I've been able to live with non-New Englanders, and see Boston from an outsiders perspective.
The friendliest people Ive been were probrolly the ones in Minnesota...
As for Massachsetts-Boston in particular do you find the people there friendly? I don't.
Are Bostonians as rude as New Yorkers? Yes-but both cities have their own unique brand of rudeness. But to the credit of New Yorkers-go to Brooklyn or the Village- you'll find a comminity where people talk to each other- Boston is a less social city..
Boston is one of those places where it is concidered inappropriate to say hello to strangers-try it sometime, say hi to someone-they'll look at you as if you've violated them.....
I moved to an Apt in Jamaica Plain, right outside of Boston, and I moved to a 3 level house- I introduced myself to a neighbor and thought I had a nice connversation-my roomate later told me she thought I must have come on to her-I wan't, I wast just saying hi!
The night scene in Boston is very hard to break into-its very clickish-
All of my friends, and even my girlfriend are in other states...
The people here suck-and as a MA native, I find I'm a much better person when I'm as far away from Boston as possible...
My brother moved to Kentucky and is shiocked how people there are so friendly, compared to the local population.

To Boston's credit, it has some of the finest museums, schools and hospitals on earth-just the local populatuion are as warm as horsehoe crabs....
If I have kids-I'm leaving MA-If I have kids, I don't want to raise them in a place that teaches people its okay to ignore your neighbors and treat your fellow human like dirt. I prefer a place where neighbors treat each other like human beings...It's odd, friendly people from other parts of the country change once they settle in MA-they become cold and aloof. I have a friend from Houston who was all smiles and positive-since moving here, she does nothing but scowl..
Minnesota here I come..
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Old 12-11-2007, 11:47 AM
 
1,149 posts, read 5,508,698 times
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That's funny considering many Bostonians are of Irish descent. Irish-American is not the same as Irish from Ireland. Nonetheless, I didn't get quite that impression in Ireland although it was clear how they got greedy with all the new money. Because of the Catholic background they appear warmer hearted than Scandinavians or Englishmen. But I suppose they aren't particularly warm compared to more southern people where extended family is important. Have you thought if climate might influence friendliness?

I think directness can be good. That way you know where you have people. Germans are known for that in Europe. In some cultures (Japanese?) it can appear impolite.
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Old 12-11-2007, 07:45 PM
 
Location: Camberville
14,996 posts, read 19,994,603 times
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I actually love the people here and realize even more how much I HATE the fake friendliness of much of the country. What some people consider friendly, I consider rude. I don't want to be talked to on the street by a stranger, I don't want to be asked about my personal business, and I don't want the contents of my grocery cart scrutinized- all of which has happened to me in the South and Midwest. These people think they are being friendly and it absolutely drives me nuts!

Cold and aloof is not unfriendly... in the fast paced life of a city, it's a way of being. About your neighbor, is she a single woman? I know I am hypervilagent as a single woman, especially when living in the city, about the men around me. That's not something you have to worry about as much in Minnesota.
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Old 12-12-2007, 12:57 AM
 
Location: Texas
2,394 posts, read 3,899,311 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by charolastra00 View Post
Cold and aloof is not unfriendly...
Actually, that is a pretty good working definition of unfriendly.
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Old 12-12-2007, 09:08 AM
 
Location: Maryland's 6th District.
8,350 posts, read 24,379,461 times
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Minnesotans are not nice. Yes they will talk to you, but they secretly wish that they were doing something else. They just don't have the balls to say so. I lived in Minneapolis for ten years and I am glad to live in New England, a place where if someone chats with you for a few minutes you know it's because they are being genuine. I find Mainers to be the friendliest.
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Old 12-12-2007, 09:12 AM
 
Location: Maryland's 6th District.
8,350 posts, read 24,379,461 times
Reputation: 6506
Quote:
Originally Posted by internat View Post
Irish-American is not the same as Irish from Ireland.
Finally! Yes! Someone else realizes this! Irish-Americans and Irish Irish are two different people. Completely different. America is the only country in which being Irish is considered cool.
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Old 12-12-2007, 07:15 PM
 
2,979 posts, read 5,328,318 times
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I've visited many cities throughout the U.S., basically every median to large city on the East Coast, the major ones in Texas and California and I will say Boston is the most difficult to get any conversation at all. People do not like eye contact or like to take the time for simple talk.

I think once you get to know most people regardless of where they are located, most are nice people, but Boston people do not go out of their way to make friends or make you feel involved. Once they have a few friends, they don't let people in their circle very easily. From living in MA and visiting Boston more than any other medium to major city I've met fewer people out in Boston than anywhere else. I've made friends and kept in close touch with people in D.C., and cities in Texas, but never in Boston. Even when getting introduced to people from friends people in and around Boston don't really care too much about adding friends.

I prefer people to at least make eye contact and a simple "hey, how are you" I think that is just friendly. I think people in Boston tend to be less patient and more uptight in general. It just appears that many other cities are more relaxed. I don't expect people to tell me their whole life story (I have yet to experience this), but it would be nice for a short casual conversation without getting a "why are you talking to me" look. In Texas when I was at a bar I've had people sitting at the bar help get the bartenders attention and order the drink for me. I thought that was very considerate. Little things like that make you feel welcome and more enjoyable.

I always thought the cold weather didn't help, it appears most people in Boston are in a better mood during the summer months, but overall they are still cold and standoffish. I also think because Boston doesn't have a lot of people from outside New England, it doesn't become a melting pot. Go to other cities and you will meet people from all over the country. You don't see this as common in the Boston area. I have friends in Boston who never really met or knew the people they lived next in apartments.

I don't really think people are fake-friendly just because they make conversation with you like some people do in the south. I don't consider people rude up north because they are busy and sometimes don't have time to talk or are not in the mood, but I would like to see some eye contact or a "hi" would be nice and give a sense of comfort. I've had friends in the north who stabbed me in the back after telling me how good a friend I was and meant a lot to them...so the whole "friends in the north are forever" doesn't always apply either.

Snallygaster...I agree with what you said. I also find I'm more open when I'm in other places where people are relaxed and actually interested in a friendly chat and sometimes getting to know people.
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Old 12-12-2007, 07:17 PM
 
Location: southern california
61,284 posts, read 83,944,649 times
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i love boston but i noticed 2 groups of people

one so very smart i could barely understand what they were saying when they walked down the sidewalk talking to each other.

two - got a leather jacket and hockey skates slung over his back talked and acted just like the fonz.

thats it.
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Old 12-13-2007, 08:54 AM
 
Location: Camberville
14,996 posts, read 19,994,603 times
Reputation: 26372
Quote:
Originally Posted by HeadedWest View Post
Actually, that is a pretty good working definition of unfriendly.
Unfriendly is being rude, crabby, or just plain mean to a person. Being cold and aloof means you don't go out of your way to bother someone. When I first moved here and looked lost on the street, I had plenty of people stop and ask me if I needed help or directions- all Bostonians. But they're not about to try to make conversation with me on a subway or a grocery store- and I LOVE that. You can tell who the tourists are by the people who try to strike up conversations on the T...
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Old 12-13-2007, 02:21 PM
 
Location: Texas
2,394 posts, read 3,899,311 times
Reputation: 1410
Quote:
Originally Posted by charolastra00 View Post
Unfriendly is being rude, crabby, or just plain mean to a person. Being cold and aloof means you don't go out of your way to bother someone.
From dictionary.com: the top definition of unfriendly

"not amicable; not friendly or kindly in disposition; unsympathetic; aloof: an unfriendly coldness of manner."

Notice the word aloof in there?
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