Do you find Bostonians to be friendly-or cold people? (Winchester: apartment, neighbourhoods)

[whinton]

I am originally from the South, now live in Boston, and overall I think people are very friendly here. Bostonians are quick, impatient, and sarcastic, but are very genuine. I hear most people say 'thank you' to bus drivers when getting off, I have neighbors that I barely know snowplow my driveway and refuse to take anything in return, very casual acquaintences have drop off gifts and/or food after we adopted a child.

That said, there are times that, like in any city, life can be frustrating (ie waiting longer time for a bus, sitting in traffic, wanting to get home to family, etc) which would make someone cranky. Bostonians typically dont like to stick their nose in other people's business and generally think other people don't want to be bothered, so may come across as not interested, but once you make a connection it is real.

[Merlander]

Originally Posted by K-Luv

Finally! Yes! Someone else realizes this! Irish-Americans and Irish Irish are two different people. Completely different. America is the only country in which being Irish is considered cool.

Any time you look at a group of Irish-Americans, or a Hungarian-Americans, or a Vietnamese-Americans...and compare them to populations where they came from...you must take into account why that group of immigrants came to the US.

Groups emigrate for different reasons. Sometimes they want to, sometimes they have to. It may be the creme-de-la-creme that "had" to leave because of a communist takeover. They may be economic or environmental refugees, because of the unavailability of work or a natrual disaster. There may be only one, or there may be several, migrations to the US.

Those factors influence the demographics and social standing of the group, and also how they compare to the "people back home."

[LeavingMA]

Originally Posted by Tim Rankin

Any time you look at a group of Irish-Americans, or a Hungarian-Americans, or a Vietnamese-Americans...and compare them to populations where they came from...you must take into account why that group of immigrants came to the US.

Groups emigrate for different reasons. Sometimes they want to, sometimes they have to. It may be the creme-de-la-creme that "had" to leave because of a communist takeover. They may be economic or environmental refugees, because of the unavailability of work or a natrual disaster. There may be only one, or there may be several, migrations to the US.

Those factors influence the demographics and social standing of the group, and also how they compare to the "people back home."

Or like Castro did, he throws all the prisoners on boats and ships them to the U.S.

[missionhill]

...yes, the Marielitos, in 1980. But in '59-60, it was the owning class and middle class who left because of property confiscation, etc. They're the base of the to-the-right Cuban community in Florida today.

[CoolestCouple]

Yikes... my husband and I are moving to Boston within the next couple months (from So Cal) and I'm so afraid we won't make any friends!! All I hear/read is how standoffish Bostonians are and how hard it is to make friends...

[Chianti]

Overall, I think people from Boston are friendly once they get to know you....however, the process of them "getting to know you" might take years...literally.

Lots of people from Boston have a fear of talking to people they didn't know. Its funny, you'll say something to their face and they'll outright ignore you. I went to a couple of weddings with my g/f where I sat at the table (didn't know anyone at my table), turned to introduce myself to the person next to me (basic decency and manners), only to have them turn their shoulder away from me as if saying "I don't want to talk to you".

So overall, I think people from Boston are friendly like anywhere else...however, they are definitely "colder". Also, it seemed to me like people there were always grumpy and in a bad mood. Maybe it was the crappy weather or the ridiculously low standard of living or maybe the liberal loonies who run the political scene.

[LeavingMA]

Originally Posted by Chianti

Overall, I think people from Boston are friendly once they get to know you....however, the process of them "getting to know you" might take years...literally.

Lots of people from Boston have a fear of talking to people they didn't know. Its funny, you'll say something to their face and they'll outright ignore you. I went to a couple of weddings with my g/f where I sat at the table (didn't know anyone at my table), turned to introduce myself to the person next to me (basic decency and manners), only to have them turn their shoulder away from me as if saying "I don't want to talk to you".

So overall, I think people from Boston are friendly like anywhere else...however, they are definitely "colder". Also, it seemed to me like people there were always grumpy and in a bad mood. Maybe it was the crappy weather or the ridiculously low standard of living or maybe the liberal loonies who run the political scene.

I second your statement. Many people will ignore you or if you go to a party, many people will not go out of their way to greet you. It doesn't mean they are "mean" people, but they are fine with everything in their life and don't feel like going out of their way or taking time to get to know new people.

I always said the weather up here doesn't help peoples' moods.

[CoolestCouple]

LeavingMA...

Do you suggest a way to get to know people then? My husband and I are fairly outgoing and don't want to scare people off but we do want to make connections and make friends... thanks!!

[applejuice]

I have had the pleasure of visiting Boston every summer for the last 10yrs since my husbands family lives there .

I don't consider Boston a very warm and fuzzy place. It also seems a little snobby (or maybe it has to do with where my hubby family lives)

He is constantly driving me crazy about moving there and I have told him I will move there when hell freezes over

I think it is a great place to visit, but it is not for me. I love the south...where I can afford to buy a home, not freeze to death, and people actually wave as you drive by.

It is a constant battle between hubby and I...but I am not MOVING!!!

[LeavingMA]

Originally Posted by CoolestCouple

LeavingMA...

Do you suggest a way to get to know people then? My husband and I are fairly outgoing and don't want to scare people off but we do want to make connections and make friends... thanks!!

I wish I really knew as I've made more friends in other cities than in Boston...and I grew up in MA. I like to make new friends and meet new people, but it can be tough around here. I usually end up just hanging out with my old friends. I think many people around here do the same and just are not that interested in new friends.

I think as a couple you have an advantage because either you or your husband can meet someone and get introduced to their significant other.

I think if you got involved in some organization or group event. Anything where you get a chance to meet some people and are almost forced to acknowledge the people around you. Many will not go out of their way, so if it is something everyone has in common you will be more likely to get along and develop some kind of friendship. You will definitely have to put yourself "out there" to people here more than most other places. It will require more effort just to break the ice.