Why are people from Mass rude? (Boston, Natick: to buy, private school, college)

[locolobo1234]

ALCON:

Why are people from Mass rude?

Here is my experiances: I'm in a grocey store, I'm in uniform (Active Duty Army) and I walk up to where the premade sandwiches are and say (Hello) to a older lady.
And a older lady says (What do you want?).
I tell her (I don't want nothing I'm just trying to be polite).
Then she says (What you selling?).
Then I say (I'm not a salesman, I'm a Soldier). I grab my sandwitch and leave.

Another:

Its Halloween night and my fellow Soldiers are giving candy to the children at the gate of our post. And we start running low on candy. So once again I go back to that same store and run into another (polite person from Mass). And she asks (Who do think you are?).
I try to explain to her that I'm a Soldier stationed in Natick, MA (Yes there is a Active Duty Army Base at Natick).
She says (Well I have been living here for 20 years and there is no Army Base here in Natick!)
Well I tell her politly (Well I'm sorry you feel that way. Have a good night).

I can go on and on. And I don't shop at this store. I drive 30mins to HANCOM AFB to buy food. I don't need to be fighting with people in uniform. When I have to buy something I go in civilian clothes.

So maybe it's just me? OK, my son goes to High School here in Mass. So after 2 years my son still has no friends in school. I go to the school and ask: Why? Well we get all the school faculty togather and the answer is my son is scary. Scary? yes he is quite, reserved, tall and wears Army shirts. I'm astonished, I ask if he is bulling or threating other children poorly and all the teachers state no my son is very polite and calm. Well I told my son to stop wearing Army shirts. Because he is scary. Well that didn't work.

I requested to go to Iraq so I could move my family. So please somebody explain. WHY? Why are people so rude?

[canyontothesky]

Maybe this isn't what you want to hear, and maybe people will disagree with me on this, but obviously there's a war right now and there isn't a huge support for it. I think maybe people see a person in uniform and associate it with their thoughts on that. Also, the north, in my experience, is not as army-friendly as the south. Once, I was at the Atlanta airport and I saw all these people standing around and applauding a large group of uniformed men who had just arrived. I'd never seen anything like that in Boston.
Um, and maybe if you encountered rude people at this one store, you just shouldn't go to that store because maybe those people work there aren't friendly, but that doesn't mean MA people aren't as a whole. Lots more friendly than in Manhattan.

[Leana76]

There's rude people everywhere.

I've lived in Arizona for 8 years now and I'm originally for the south (southeast of the U.S. near Louisiana). And I have a drawl (very proud of it, by the way) and I get treated like a dumb **** (pardon my language) sometimes here. And most people here don't like people from the southeast.

So I know what you are going through, but it's everywhere, sweety. You just mind your own self and don't worry about them too much. You keep to yourself and they won't bother you too much anymore.

[sfosyd]

If people are deliberately being rude to the military because they disagree with government policies, there is no excuse for that. These people are serving their country! For shame...

That said, if you want to experience real rudeness try being a liberal in the south. I drove around the south the summer before the Kerry election. Being the liberal that I am, I had a Kerry bumpersticker on my car as well as multiple tee shirts showing my support. People gave me the finger in the car, delibrately tried to cut me off, called me a f*g, and told me I was unpatriotic. North of Atlanta, someone vandalized my car and wrote Bush in permanent marker on the back window....

[WannaGoHome]

unfortunately people are just rude in general. seriously. i've learned this the hard way. i find people in MA to be pretty friendly but reserved. It's the NE in general. Nice people, but not overtly chatty. Where are you from originally? I'm going to guess Atlantic Seaboard NC or SC maybe. Or midwest? Maybe it's just a comparison of where you're from? Sorry people are being so rude to you

[Bostonian08]

Originally Posted by locolobo1234

ALCON:

Why are people from Mass rude?

Here is my experiances: I'm in a grocey store, I'm in uniform (Active Duty Army) ... When I have to buy something I go in civilian clothes.

Well I'm ex AF. My 1st Q is what uniform are you wearing - dress or BDU? It's against AF regs to wear BDU's in the civilian world because civilians are often (justifiably) frightened by the sight of soldiers in combat fatigues. So is that the issue?

As previous posters stated, you also need to understand the local traditions. As the old saying goes, "when in Rome, do as the Romans do." Even if you are in you military dress uniform, people in Mass are largely opposed to the Iraq war, so although you as a US Soldier are presumably only doing your service to the defense of the nation, you must understand that this whole military action is viewed by about 90% of the world's population as a gross imperialist endeavor. The only places in the world where you will get salutes parading about in uniform is in the conservative sections of the USA and few (if there are any) remaining allies.

Whether one agrees or disagrees with the current US agenda, that fact is BushCo has alienated 90+% of the world and 70% of the US. And unfortunately, the good people who wear the US military uniform in the tradition of the Omaha beach landers have had the worldwide respectability of the symbol that is the US Military uniform polluted by a series of wars since 1950 that have in most people's opinion ranged from unjust to wholly illegal.

With that said, I would suggest that a good first step for a military man to live up to his oath to "protect and defend..." is you must protect and defend the citizens of MA from their own misgivings. Conduct your military business a bit more covertly and you will experience less anxiety.

In your defense, I will say that to some degree what you are dealing with is simply the culture of New England. Even without the uniform, you will find people of NE are simply cautious of strangers - less open and friendly than people in other parts of the US. All around the world cultures vary in their customs, NE is no exception. Being from upstate NY I thought Bostonians were pretty cold fish - still do actually. But that's the way they are, and after you are here long enough, you actually begin to be happy enough to just do business and cut the small talk. Or maybe not. I dunno, I've always been a very personable person so maybe I will feel refreshed with the friendly Texans - or maybe I will quickly tire of all the small talk.

So where are you from CrazyWolf? Your handle sounds like a Mexican translation of an Native American name.

Originally Posted by locolobo1234

So maybe it's just me? OK, my son goes to High School here in Mass. So after 2 years my son still has no friends in school. I go to the school and ask: Why? Well we get all the school faculty togather and the answer is my son is scary. Scary? yes he is quite, reserved, tall and wears Army shirts. I'm astonished, I ask if he is bulling or threating other children poorly and all the teachers state no my son is very polite and calm. Well I told my son to stop wearing Army shirts. Because he is scary. Well that didn't work.

Well I feel for you on this issue bro. I was an import into Mass in my sophomore year and I can say I didn't fall in too well with the locals either. I ended up with the "bad kids" cuz they accepted me. I got over it when I got out of high school. Besides the good kids, high schools are filled with cliques and fools and all the future drunks, wife beaters, and other scum that society is still trying to save because they are still just children. Once I escape the public high school and society began excluding the dregs from my environs (working at the Hospital, in the military) things went much better.

I guess it depends on how your son handles his situation. Maybe he's just kinda introverted and really doesn't care to have a big social circle? Maybe he has online friends instead (my son does). Online friendships are a whole new dynamic in this generation, and believe me, they can be better than congregating with the local yokels. I should know, I married an online friend, and we've been together for 13 beautiful years now.

But I think you're a good father by showing your concerns for your son - even just for being aware. My suggestion is you should try to get a real feel for how he feels about HS. HS is not always the best time of everyone's life - it was about the worst for me. If he can handle it, well then ok. Just reassure him that he's not crazy, all the rest of them are. The world IS an insane place, all you can do is keep your mind on your work and things will definitely be better come college.

OTOH, if he really can't stand it, put him in a different school. I'd uproot for my boy's interest if the school system won't help. You could pony up for a few years in private school just to give him a fresh start. Maybe move out of your town to get away from the townies. Lastly, you could have him GED if he promises to go right into college. Sometimes the thing is even the best minds fall victim to fools - look at history - Gandhi, Galileo, Joan of Arc, MLK, Jesus Christ fer chrissake!

It's not easy to start over. We're moving from Boston to Dallas this summer and I worry how my little guy will do with his culture shock. I worry about me too. But I assure, "when in Dallas, I will do as the Dallasites do..." I won't provoke locals with a Buck Fush bumper sticker, instead I'm going to buy my beagle a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Outfit. The world is a place of vastly diverse areas of interest, and I see no reason why any one (politics, religion, etc) need pit me at odds with the local populace. I also collect Roman coins, ya know?

Originally Posted by locolobo1234

I requested to go to Iraq so I could move my family. So please somebody explain. WHY? Why are people so rude?

All I can say about this is I think the worst disservice you can do for your son is getting yourself killed in Iraq. I hope you change your mind. There is nothing going on over there so important that I and I think most of us consider so critical that we would ask you to so jeopardize the welfare of you and yours in such a way.

When it comes to supporting the troops, I believe that the best way I can support you (or they could support me) is to never never never ask you to risk yourself unless it is absolutely necessary. With that in mind, perhaps you might understand how in that sense people who oppose the war are support the troops far more than those who endorse it. We don't want to to risk yourself to cut the oil price. But when they start putting people in ovens again, I'm still strong enough to wear the boots as well.

[desertsun41]

People are rude everywhere. Even in Texas which was voted the most friendly state.

If you think Mass. is rude you auta try NY, especially the city. Sometimes I think NJ is more rude then NY.

And with the economy in a recession and a depression in some areas you just can not expect people to be smiling all day. People are stressed. So many many people have no idea how they are going to buy gas to get to work the next day. They know their pay check will not cover gas, food, mortgage, etc and they will have to use the ol Visa card to live on yet again.

If you encounter a rude person you have no idea why. They could have just lost their house, job, family member and on and on and on.

[TomDot]

Originally Posted by locolobo1234

ALCON:

Why are people from Mass rude?

Here is my experiances: I'm in a grocey store, I'm in uniform (Active Duty Army) and I walk up to where the premade sandwiches are and say (Hello) to a older lady.
And a older lady says (What do you want?).
I tell her (I don't want nothing I'm just trying to be polite).
Then she says (What you selling?).
Then I say (I'm not a salesman, I'm a Soldier). I grab my sandwitch and leave.

Another:

Its Halloween night and my fellow Soldiers are giving candy to the children at the gate of our post. And we start running low on candy. So once again I go back to that same store and run into another (polite person from Mass). And she asks (Who do think you are?).
I try to explain to her that I'm a Soldier stationed in Natick, MA (Yes there is a Active Duty Army Base at Natick).
She says (Well I have been living here for 20 years and there is no Army Base here in Natick!)
Well I tell her politly (Well I'm sorry you feel that way. Have a good night).

I can go on and on. And I don't shop at this store. I drive 30mins to HANCOM AFB to buy food. I don't need to be fighting with people in uniform. When I have to buy something I go in civilian clothes.

So maybe it's just me? OK, my son goes to High School here in Mass. So after 2 years my son still has no friends in school. I go to the school and ask: Why? Well we get all the school faculty togather and the answer is my son is scary. Scary? yes he is quite, reserved, tall and wears Army shirts. I'm astonished, I ask if he is bulling or threating other children poorly and all the teachers state no my son is very polite and calm. Well I told my son to stop wearing Army shirts. Because he is scary. Well that didn't work.

I requested to go to Iraq so I could move my family. So please somebody explain. WHY? Why are people so rude?

A couple of things to say:
I've lived here my whole life and have never gotten the kind of rudeness that you have received. Maybe you misunderstood the lady. Maybe, since it was halloween she actually asked you what was your costume.
As far as your kid goes, teenagers suck.

[Leana76]

Originally Posted by desertsun41

People are rude everywhere. Even in Texas which was voted the most friendly state.

If you think Mass. is rude you auta try NY, especially the city. Sometimes I think NJ is more rude then NY.

And with the economy in a recession and a depression in some areas you just can not expect people to be smiling all day. People are stressed. So many many people have no idea how they are going to buy gas to get to work the next day. They know their pay check will not cover gas, food, mortgage, etc and they will have to use the ol Visa card to live on yet again.

If you encounter a rude person you have no idea why. They could have just lost their house, job, family member and on and on and on.

I grew up in Texas and I totally agree with you...Especially Dallas, Tx. They are very snobby and self-centered up there. Even a lot of the women there too (a lot of fake ones there with fake personalities). I totally agree with about Texas being rude at times. It's everywhere.

[crazyworld]

I am really baffled as to how you were treated.......As for me, I am from Massachusetts and I personally say, thank you for your service.
We are not ALL rude.