Similar to yourself (apart from the pregnant bit, of course). The mind is constantly chattering to itself and won't be stilled. I gently brought it back to stillness, but there it went off chattering again. Time and again I brought it back to stillness, but after ten days of doing so, I still couldn't stop it chattering. After a while I just accepted that it was that kind of mind and it would be unkind to keep it tied up. So we chatter together.
I certainly found that the idea of not worrying too much what other people think of me only went so far. I had to accept that I do care, very much, what people think of me. A staggering amount of thought goes into how I present myself to give a good impression and, like the chattering mind, I had to learn to work with it, not against it. While I had better not deny that I could not tell myself that I didn't care what people thought of me, I knew that it would also be cheating myself by saying that I thought things that I knew I didn't think true, just to please people. That would be denying myself as well.
If I am going to take words of wisdom from some source, Star trek will do as well as any other. 'We are a violent race - and we will kill - but not today' (1). It is deception to deny what makes us tick as humans, but it is better for our future if we apply a moral code that may not be natural for us, but it is better.
While the natural impulse when one is insulted is the good ol' poke in the eye, it is better to quietly bring that impulse to stillness too and reply with a smile (or a smiley will do) and some reasoned response. I always feel better for it. Especially as it drives 'em wild.
(1) it's always fun to look that up and see how close I remembered it.
Hah
A Taste of Armageddon", in which Kirk says, "
We're Human beings with the blood of a million savage years on our hands, but we can stop it. We can admit that we're killers, but we're not going to kill, today. That's all it takes. Knowing that we won't kill, today."
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