Best cities in Cali if you are gay and not rich? (San Diego: middle-class, fit in)

[CantWait2Bthere]

Oh okay doingitoutdoors...I was wondering for some odd reason.

I am not gay but I wondered like if you all go up and ask people off the street "are you friendly to gays?" I mean, I could hardly imagine someone doing that but who knows what's possible.

[directsci]

Most gay areas are the most expensive available. Gay men are famous for driving up the housing and rental prices...all of that good tasted and urban renewal. If you are a student, or entry level worker, you will need to find roommates. Avoid the party zones, such as Hollywood...except for an occasional vist. Tell any prospective roommates bluntly what your habits are. If you don't do drugs, tell them that immediatly. Do not live with others who do so, it is very common here.

The most affordable gay area is Palm Springs. That is mostly an older, retired crowd. Younger areas are mostly in or near LA. Younger gay guys who want to avoid the endless parties often move to Orange County. There is not a concetrated a gay crowd here, but a mixture of everything. Maybe try everything...DO NOT LIVE IN HOLLYWOOD THOUGH.

[doingitoutdoors]

Well... looks like you guys have all the answers!
Good luck!
Fortunately, I'm well off. Not "rich", but richer than most so I can afford to live anywhere I want to. I have homes in Los Angeles & San Francisco and one in Utah. To tell the truth, I'm happiest in Utah. ULTRA low cost of living, beautiful mountains and a surprisingly large gay community with none of the "attitude" of the other 2 cities.
"Home" is where you are.

[Desertho]

I can't believe this thread went this far with only one mention of Palm Springs. So let me be the second: Palm Springs. Cheap cheap cheap. The neighboring cities of Cathedral City, and Desert Hot Springs are also in the package. There really is no comparison with other areas of the state that can combine gay presence with cheap real estate.

[CantWait2Bthere]

Funny because when I was in Palm Springs I didn't notice any gay folks. Just older couples. I might have been in the wrong place.

[lynettegayle]

Originally Posted by artsyguy

I doubt by the time I finish my degree I will be rich. But I love the idea of being near the beach and having lots of sunshine and beautiful weather.
And I know Cali is more liberal and gay friendly. So let me know what cities are good for a gay person who really doesn't make hundreds of thousands a year.

Come to Riverside t is the most afordable place to live and you would love it here. It is a family bound community and you can just be who God created you to be! Riverside is about 45 minutes from Newport Beach, Huntington beach, etc

[lynettegayle]

What do you consider well off if you are not rich?

[crownheightsnative]

if you're willing to drive and hour or two to get to the beach your options are wide open.

however I'd recommend one city that fits affordability/beach/gay friendly: LONG BEACH.

[CantWait2Bthere]

Originally Posted by lynettegayle

What do you consider well off if you are not rich?

For me, 'well off but not rich' is when you can go to the mall, find a pair of $60 jeans (which i guess is cheap compared to some brands), buy them and be glad you made the investment because they fit and look so much nicer than the jeans you bought at Kohl's.

'Rich' is when you can buy 4 or 5 pairs and never shop at Kohl's again.

[ScranBarre]

Originally Posted by CantWait2Bthere

I was just curious...what is the best way to find out if a town in gay friendly?

I think it is all up to one's own perspective. As a gay male myself who lives in what has been coined as a metropolitan area of Conservacrats (Socially-Conservative Democrats), I've experienced some instances of intolerance and hatred, but overall most people are indifferent towards my sexual orientation. I couldn't be happier! Most people in my region have the "If it's affecting neither my family or myself in a detrimental way, then what right do I have to intervene?" Do they open their arms to welcome the GLBT community? Not by a long shot. Do they go out of their way to scare us off? Nope.

My area is much, much larger than San Luis Obispo County, with over 600,000 residents, and we have three GLBT-oriented night clubs/bars, a GLBT book club, and even a GLBT resort in the Poconos that has become quite popular with the New York City/North Jersey crowd. We also have GLBT support groups at our local universities (even at my ultra-conservative one) and a local "Rainbow Alliance" that hosts regular trips, meet-and-greets, etc. and publishes regular installments of a local GLBT-related journal. There's even talk of an upcoing annual gay pride festival in Scranton. If an area that projects a "redneck" image to the rest of the nation, as Scranton does, can have a thriving GLBT community, then I foresee no reason why San Luis Obispo, in one of the most liberal states in the nation, can't.

Some people have the "Out and Proud" mentality that really grates onto my nerves, as they seem to demand attention or respect for being GLBT, as if it's something that warrants unconditional acceptance. True respect is earned, not demanded. I've actually managed to assimilate so well as a typical local resident that very few of my acquaintances outside of the internet even know of my sexual orientation (which I hope will be a blessing when I opt to run for mayor of the city in the upcoming years).

I'm sure there are even GLBT people living in rural Alabama of all places who are quite content. Overall, the nation is starting to wake up to realize that an alternative sexual orientation isn't merely some sort of gross medical malady or infectious disease that could plague their families. Most realize that it is out-of-line to create hardships for those of us who are GLBT along the same lines as it is improper to do the same to African-Americans, Latin-Americans, Asian-Americans, Jewish Americans, Arab Americans, etc.

This is why I'm getting tired of reading all of these thread on City-Data over a town being "gay-friendly." Every city in America has a GLBT population, and you can be quite happy living anywhere once you surround yourself with those who will positively influence your lives. My fellow GLBT individuals need to stop allowing their orientations to interfere with every little aspect of their lives and try to assimilate themselves as best as they can in order to succeed in life. I do my best to not "stick out like a sore thumb" as a gay person, and I think I garner a lot of respect for that from my straight counterparts. Why must a community cater to our unique sexual interests in order for you to be happy? Do what I do---choose a city that "fits" you (in my case Scranton, PA), and then strive continuously to improve the quality-of-life there for all residents---gay and straight alike. In the long-run, you'll create mountains of friends and garner truckloads of respect and accolades for your contributions.

Other than the fact that I can't find any guy willing to go out with me on a date, I'm very happy living here. Anyone can be happy living anywhere if they "make lemons out of lemonade." Try putting on a pair of rose-colored glasses sometime; they really work!