Just can't believe it (San Diego, Riverside: house, neighborhood, high school)

[2KidsforMe]

Reading these posts makes my heart sick. What has happened to my beloved home state of CA? We left almost 7 years ago for the North East. When I really think about what has happened to the most beautiful and diverse state in the country I am overwhelmed with grief. Crowds, sprawl, crime, pollution, traffic, schools, immigration, crazy housing costs, how can this be? When my grandparents moved to CA after WWII from the East Coast, they went there beause it was the promised land. They went to make a better life for themselves and their family. Not anymore it seems. Seems like people are now leaving CA to do the same thing. How ironic and sad. In the 7 years we have lived back East, we had always thought we would move home again at some point. Not now! Just had to vent. Thanks for listening.

[enlightenme]

It is funny because you didn't add insane high cost of living to your long list of CA problems. I feel like it started about 7 years ago too. The sad thing is if I could have afforded a house, I may have stayed even with those other problems you listed. I guess it is a good thing that I was pushed away from my home state because I am really enjoying my life in NC. They now say if you leave, it is near impossible to come back. In my opinion, that isn't such a bad thing.

[2KidsforMe]

Yes, I forgot to mention the high cost of housing! Ooops.

[fastfilm]

I remember your first posts, 2kids, and I'm glad to read you've made a decision for your family to have as normal an American childhood with as many good elements as possible staying where you are. When you rattled off the pluses, it really seemed to overshadow the harsh NE winters. You can always visit here, and, better still, leave!

Again, I would only recommend moving here if someone were unbelievably wealthy and can cocoon themselves from our widespread woes, or wanted to work in the entertainment business without moving to Manhattan. How sad that the most accurate advice about Southern California is to never move here otherwise. I remember discussions with my father (before he went batty with Alzheimers) that the California of his lifetime bore no resemblance to the one of my own.

[2KidsforMe]

Hi there. Just wanted you let you know that I appreciate the advice you have given me. Your response to my first post, as well as your other posts on this forum really impacted me. It was with alot of soul searching that I have decided to stay in MA. My job as a mother is to do what is best for my kids. They are better off here, no question. My best friend, from Riverside CA, visited me last week. After showing off all the sights and activities fall in New England has to offer, her advice was to stay, stay, stay. My kids marched in a Parade in our historic small town center, along with the high school marching band, girl scouts, and the local fire and police dept, just becuase we were invited to do so . Could they do that in CA? Or would we just be lost to the masses? Also, I doubt I could be really happy in CA now. I've been gone too long. It breaks my heart what has happened there. But, my kids have no concept of CA, and they don't pine away for it like I have done. Their life is here with mom and dad, their friends, and thier school. Grandma and Grandpa will just have to visit! Thanks again, you have made a difference.

[cleosmom]

Originally Posted by 2KidsforMe

Hi there. Just wanted you let you know that I appreciate the advice you have given me. Your response to my first post, as well as your other posts on this forum really impacted me. It was with alot of soul searching that I have decided to stay in MA. My job as a mother is to do what is best for my kids. They are better off here, no question. My best friend, from Riverside CA, visited me last week. After showing off all the sights and activities fall in New England has to offer, her advice was to stay, stay, stay. My kids marched in a Parade in our historic small town center, along with the high school marching band, girl scouts, and the local fire and police dept, just becuase we were invited to do so . Could they do that in CA? Or would we just be lost to the masses? Also, I doubt I could be really happy in CA now. I've been gone too long. It breaks my heart what has happened there. But, my kids have no concept of CA, and they don't pine away for it like I have done. Their life is here with mom and dad, their friends, and thier school. Grandma and Grandpa will just have to visit! Thanks again, you have made a difference.

You bring to mind a theory I don't think I ever thought of before I always swear to anyone who asks that I do not miss CA, certainly I miss some family and friends there, but not CA it's self. Maybe what I miss is the CA I knew growing up, when I knew the floorplans in our neighbor's homes because we all knew each other, the CA that was safe to play outside in the neighborhood at night, the CA that seemed like there was a lot of distance from one town/city to the next rather than alot of traffic and buildings, the CA is no longer

[fastfilm]

Maybe it's still like that in Poruguese Bend, Palos Verdes with happy little rich kids frolicking on their estates together, but for the rest of us who don't think of a 5 million dollar house as a fixer upper, it's indeed gone, or its replacement is abhorent (as with gangs as the neighborhood impetus) or vestigial. By the latter, I mean what my husband, who also grew up here, codified the other evening. He said "Southern California used to be fun even for the less well to do. You could go to the beach, the mountains, the desert, go ride a horse or a motorcycle someplace fun any time you chose. Now, doing any of the above is a major expedition." We were sitting in traffic wherein it took 90 minutes to go from one side of downtown L.A. to the opposite side when he said this.

[2KidsforMe]

Yes, what I miss is the CA I remember as a kid and as a college student in Irvine (the golden years of Orange Couty, as my husband calls them). Funny how the golden years weren't even that long ago. I'm all for progress, and change is okay too, but CA seems to changing in the wrong direction. It was a fun place to grow up. Too bad my kids couldn't have done the same in CA. We will make new memories here in the East.

[Need_affordable_home]

We have the same problem in Florida(especially south) Unless our mayors and governers do something, most of us will be gone!

[Sassberto]

On every message board, the vast majority of the content will be negative. Think of it like the proverbial "suggestion box". No one ever suggests anything positive. They just complain. Web forums are the same. I have wasted years of my life on web forums - even run a couple of heavily trafficked ones - and it's the same no matter where you go.

Once you get past that, you'll realize that California is either the worst place in the world or the greatest place in the world. For all the people that hate LA, hate San Diego, and Hate CA, I am one that disagrees. I love LA, I love San Diego, and I love California. I've been to pretty much every state in this country and nothing can compare.

Yes it's crowded, yes it's expensive, but it's also one of the most exciting, dynamic places I've ever been. It's on the edge of everything that's new and progressive in this country, and that is from a former New Yorker.

And it's been very good to me along the way :-)