No-Cuss California (Los Angeles, San Jose, San Francisco: crime, school, law)

[Curmudgeon]

Originally Posted by Clarks

Not at all, Curmudgeon, you forget, or I forgot to tell you, we own two ranches outside the state of California, what I cannot understand is why anyone would live east of the 100th Meridian, but I am glad they do, I just hope they stay there, in the rain, with the bugs.

An' we'uns appreciate yur oft expressed, low opinion of this neck-o-the-woods. Keep up the good work. It may help dissuade others from droppin' in an' Californicatin' it, especially as that could expand the gene pool and ruin the whole darn place.

[Gentoo]

This thread is absolutely hilarious. It's nice when the hyper sensitive ones stay out LOL

[Clarks]

An' we'uns appreciate yur oft expressed, low opinion of this neck-o-the-woods. Keep up the good work. It may help dissuade others from droppin' in an' Californicatin' it, especially as that could expand the gene pool and ruin the whole darn place.

"this neck o the woods" for me extends from the 100th meridian to the Atlantic Seaboard, ceptin' Cades Cove, Vermont, New Hampshire and Maine.

A Missourite came home and found his house on fire, rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here. My house is on fire!"
"OK," replied the fireman, "how do we get there?"
"Say, don't you still have those big red trucks?"

Gentoo, I try to stay PC, that means Pickon Curmudgeon

[Curmudgeon]

Missouri Laws
* Single men between the ages of twenty-one and fifty must pay an annual tax of one dollar (enacted 1820).
* It is not illegal to speed. [unfortunately, that one was repealed ]

City Laws

Buckner
* In this small town of only 4,000, yard waste may be burned any day except Sunday.

Columbia
* One may not drink in a bar between 2:00 and 6:00 AM.

Excelsior Springs
* Hard objects may not be thrown by hand.
* Worrying squirrels will not be tolerated.

Kansas City
* Minors are not allowed to purchase cap pistols, however they may buy shotguns freely.
* Installation of bathtubs with four legs resembling animal paws is prohibited.

Marceline
* Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.

Marquette
* It is illegal for more than four unrelated persons to occupy the same dwelling (The Brothel Law).

Mole
* Frightening a baby is in violation of the law.

Natchez
* It shall be unlawful to provide beer or other intoxicants to elephants.

Perryville
* It is illegal to throw stones at birds in the city limits

Purdy
* Dancing is strictly prohibited.

St. Louis
* It's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket.
{This law refers back to the extinct Italian celebration, Hill Day, when beer was served in buckets.}
* A milk man may not run while on duty.

University City
* No person may own a PVC pipe.
* No person may have a "yard sale" in their front yard. In addition to this, no person shall have more than two yard sales a year.
* Houses may not have lights on them that shine into the window of a neighbor's house.
* It is illegal to request for someone to "watch over" your parked car.
* One may not honk another's horn.
* Four women may not rent an apartment together.

[Clarks]

I like that, I hear people yelling that "illegals are criminals!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

And yet, based on that set of laws, I will betcha that there are lots of criminals!!!!!!!!!!

running around Missouri. I am so glad that Progressive California is not saddled with such

[elisaa]

Originally Posted by Lifeshadower

Well, I might actually be thrown in debtors prison or be sent to the chair then.

It was nice knowing you guys

You'll have plenty of company! I have been known to chose some rather indistinguishable nouns verbs and adjectives. Most just refer to it as potty mouth and smile

[Gentoo]

Originally Posted by Clarks

"this neck o the woods" for me extends from the 100th meridian to the Atlantic Seaboard, ceptin' Cades Cove, Vermont, New Hampshire and Maine.

A Missourite came home and found his house on fire, rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here. My house is on fire!"
"OK," replied the fireman, "how do we get there?"
"Say, don't you still have those big red trucks?"

Gentoo, I try to stay PC, that means Pickon Curmudgeon

haha I've actually heard this one in some other context lol

[Gentoo]

California, we have ours too LOL

Arcadia
Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways.

Baldwin Park
Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.

Belvedere
City Council order reads: “No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash.

Burlingame
It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds.

Chico
One must obtain a permit from the city to throw hay in a cesspool.

[elisaa]

Originally Posted by curmudgeon

an' we'uns appreciate yur oft expressed, low opinion of this neck-o-the-woods. Keep up the good work. It may help dissuade others from droppin' in an' californicatin' it, especially as that could expand the gene pool and ruin the whole darn place.

:d

[typhoidmary]

Originally Posted by Curmudgeon

Your Legislature and tax dollars still hard at work!

Capitol Alert: No-cuss California? Assembly takes aim at four-letter words

Now if they attached a fine to it CA's budget woes would be history (and I'd have to scratch CA off my list of potential homes)

Joking aside, though, one would think they would have more important things to be discussing