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Old 10-23-2022, 01:02 PM
 
Location: Vancouver
17,495 posts, read 13,238,999 times
Reputation: 10957

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Quote:
Originally Posted by netwit View Post
I'm a widow now.

Trying on the word for size.
My sincerest condolences Netwit.
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Old 10-23-2022, 04:02 PM
 
Location: Canada
6,754 posts, read 8,263,913 times
Reputation: 9428
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zoisite View Post
Awww. ((( Netwit ))) hugs to you, I'm so sorry to read this sad news. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Do you mind if I ask when your DH passed on? I hope you are coping okay and have plenty of support from your community.

.

Very recently. I was too busy with funeral arrangements to have time to think but that is past and now I don't know how I am doing. I was thinking that it probably happens over time to get used to being a widow. Yesterday wasn't a very good day for me. The house didn't feel right.

As his sole caregiver, apart from homecare nurses, I've been run off my feet all year. He spent less than a day in hospital where he died.

I'm glad I have dogs.
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Old 10-23-2022, 07:15 PM
 
Location: Toronto
13,662 posts, read 13,967,988 times
Reputation: 4537
Quote:
Originally Posted by netwit View Post
Very recently. I was too busy with funeral arrangements to have time to think but that is past and now I don't know how I am doing. I was thinking that it probably happens over time to get used to being a widow. Yesterday wasn't a very good day for me. The house didn't feel right.

As his sole caregiver, apart from homecare nurses, I've been run off my feet all year. He spent less than a day in hospital where he died.

I'm glad I have dogs.
And you know what - you don't have to know how you are doing right now. It is ok to have bad days. Feel what you feel and let time do the rest. I'm glad you have your dogs with you and I hope you have a good friend/family support system.

Virtual hug to you Netwit
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Old 10-23-2022, 09:15 PM
 
Location: B.C., Canada
13,505 posts, read 12,280,748 times
Reputation: 31169
Quote:
Originally Posted by netwit View Post
Very recently. I was too busy with funeral arrangements to have time to think but that is past and now I don't know how I am doing. I was thinking that it probably happens over time to get used to being a widow. Yesterday wasn't a very good day for me. The house didn't feel right.

As his sole caregiver, apart from homecare nurses, I've been run off my feet all year. He spent less than a day in hospital where he died.

I'm glad I have dogs.
It's normal to feel that way. And it does take time to get used to it. When my husband died and after the funeral , etc. was dealt with I went into a mental state of brain fog that was almost like a fugue state or being in limbo afterwards.

I found this self-help book of advice to be most helpful to get my thoughts and equilibrium back to more normal through the next few weeks and months following. It's claimed to be one of the best books ever published on the subjects of grief and loss and I highly recommend it. You don't have to focus on concentrating on reading it from front to back, you can read it in bits and pieces skipping back and forth through the book if that is easier:

How to Survive the Loss of a Love
by Melba Colgrove, Harold Bloomfield, Peter McWilliams

At the first link you can download the book to your computer,

https://www.e-booksdirectory.com/details.php?ebook=2897

or you can read it for free directly online right here:

SURVIVE -- TABLE OF CONTENTS

.
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Old 10-23-2022, 09:22 PM
 
2,686 posts, read 1,672,446 times
Reputation: 3011
Quote:
Originally Posted by netwit View Post
I'm a widow now.

Trying on the word for size.
May your husband Rest In Peace. And may the Lord comfort you and your family.
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Old 10-25-2022, 03:56 PM
 
Location: Gatineau, Québec
25,870 posts, read 34,612,168 times
Reputation: 10947
Very sorry to hear that Netwit. My deepest sympathy.

You take good care of yourself now. Sounds like you've more than deserved it with your level of devotion.
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Old 10-25-2022, 06:45 PM
 
Location: Canada
6,594 posts, read 4,392,758 times
Reputation: 7888
I’m so sorry, Netwit.
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Old 10-26-2022, 11:25 PM
 
Location: Alberta, Canada
3,253 posts, read 2,723,849 times
Reputation: 4707
I am saddened to hear this news, Netwit. My condolences, and my hope that you can find peace at this time.
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Old 10-27-2022, 12:26 AM
 
Location: Elsewhere
81,676 posts, read 75,117,221 times
Reputation: 104470
I am sorry, netwit. Loss is part of life, and it's never OK even when we know it's coming.
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Old 10-28-2022, 03:29 PM
 
22,925 posts, read 14,205,971 times
Reputation: 16962
Let me add mine to the list of condolence wishes.

The long struggle you both went through is now over. Your husband is now at peace and in a better place. Now a different struggle begins for you. It will be one of many, many little normally insignificant daily events now asserting an awareness that your life is forever altered.

It is true that time is a healer but, at this stage of our lives it's not so much a healing aspect of life but rather just a dulling of the shock the death of a loved one brings. Seek solace in the stalwart abilities of long time friends and the love of family. Pets will of course figure greatly in helping you cope.

Best wishes Net.
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