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Old 05-06-2016, 08:09 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,874 posts, read 17,190,006 times
Reputation: 40746

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Quote:
Originally Posted by silibran View Post
Germaine, I have the feeling that the doc didn't want to talk to you, so he purposely avoided you. When my dad was quite ill, his doc seemed to do that. I think the docs don't like telling family bad news, or maybe don't want to have to defend their actions, which might be true in your case.

Your DH is a high needs patient, and because he has you as his advocate, he is still alive. If you had not been with him through so many problems in the last year, goodness knows how he would have ended up. I don't think hospitals are equipped to handle high needs, older patients, and so they mess up. There are fewer nurses on the floor now, and they are stretched thin. You are a good example of someone who shows up every day and insists on proper treatment for your DH. I doubt you could have done much more that what you did.

I hope you have a better day tomorrow. Being in a hospital all day is the worst.

God bless.
Yes, it is possible that the doctor was embarrassed that she missed his pneumonia on Tuesday when it was so bad on Wednesday that he needed to be hospitalized.
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Old 05-06-2016, 08:24 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,874 posts, read 17,190,006 times
Reputation: 40746
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
Update-May 6
I won't miss the doctor today. They put a note to her in Stephen's file to call me if I am not in his room. I wrote a two foot by two foot message on the white board and I taped a 4 by 6 note card on the computer asking her to call me as I have questions.

Another vent. I arrived at the hospital yesterday at 10:30 AM and my husband had not had breakfast or anything else to eat (patients have to order their food as it is not sent automatically), nor did it appear that he had drank any water or juice, nor had he washed up, nor had he done anything except just lay in bed and stare at the ceiling.

While both the nurse & nurses aide told me that they "understood that he needed to be offered a choice rather than yes & no questions (where he answers "No" 95% of the time)" from their examples to me it was pretty clear that they really did not "understand" even though it was in his chart.

Sheesh! I was so "busy" waiting for the doctor and caring for him yesterday that I forgot to put up some signs explaining his needs and reminding him to eat & drink (if I'm not there).

Because he is there for pneumonia the hospital staff seems to ignore (or they don't know) that he has dementia and a TBI and can not be expected to do everything on his own like other patients.

When I get there today I will talk to the Nurse Supervisor (or whatever she is called) on the floor to see the best way to handle that.
After I spoke with the doctor on the phone I was so exhausted that I went back to bed. I woke up at 12:30 PM by a call from my husband saying that they were "holding him captive" in the hospital and I needed to pick him up. I called his nurse and she said that he got dressed and wanted to leave so they called his doctor to get permission to release him!!!

I said that he has dementia AND I have his activated medical power of attorney so why didn't you call me first? Well by the time that I got to the hospital he had signed some type of document saying that he was leaving and the doctor had called back giving them permission to let him leave.

It only took me one minute talking to him and he decided to stay. Sheesh! Why did not they just call me?

So, I got there at 1:30 PM. Guess What? Again, my husband had not had any food or juice or anything else (the do give water at every shift change). I had talked to the nurse about 10 AM and reminded them that he needed assistance ordering food and that if asked he will say "No" (I also said that I would be in later). He also was not helped or reminded to wash up or comb his hair.

I wonder if they would had let him go days without eating if someone wouldn't be there to advocate for him?

So tonight before I left we discussed what he wanted for breakfast and I wrote it on a big sheet of paper and taped it to the nurses computer in his room.
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Old 05-06-2016, 09:00 PM
 
Location: Leaving fabulous Las Vegas, Nevada
3,854 posts, read 6,847,894 times
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Wow! It's no wonder he didn't want to be there! I know that's got to be extremely frustrating, Germaine. You sure didn't need this.
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Old 05-06-2016, 09:23 PM
 
1,165 posts, read 651,526 times
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Germaine, I also found there was a huge eating/drinking problem with my mother when she was hospitalized. The tray is basically dumped in front of the patient and left there until it is picked up. We helped my mother remove the straw from the paper, open up the closed containers, get the plastic utensils out of the cellophane wrapper, cut up her food, etc. - all things she never could have done herself at the time. We never saw one patient helped with eating by staff.

Unfortunately, the staff is cut to the bone. The techs basically take vitals and are run ragged. Bathroom calls could take 20 minutes for a response. My mother had never worn Depends in her life and was determined to get to the bathroom. We had nice nurses/techs on the hospital floor and we thanked them profusely for any help, but it was very obvious hospitals just want to get the patient out ASAP. I would think food and hydration would be important to that end.

What this boils down to is your husband is better off at home with you, although I know you will be exhausted. Best of luck and good wishes for a successful recovery.
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Old 05-07-2016, 08:15 AM
 
Location: somewhere
4,264 posts, read 8,137,491 times
Reputation: 3143
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
After I spoke with the doctor on the phone I was so exhausted that I went back to bed. I woke up at 12:30 PM by a call from my husband saying that they were "holding him captive" in the hospital and I needed to pick him up. I called his nurse and she said that he got dressed and wanted to leave so they called his doctor to get permission to release him!!!

I said that he has dementia AND I have his activated medical power of attorney so why didn't you call me first? Well by the time that I got to the hospital he had signed some type of document saying that he was leaving and the doctor had called back giving them permission to let him leave.

It only took me one minute talking to him and he decided to stay. Sheesh! Why did not they just call me?

So, I got there at 1:30 PM. Guess What? Again, my husband had not had any food or juice or anything else (the do give water at every shift change). I had talked to the nurse about 10 AM and reminded them that he needed assistance ordering food and that if asked he will say "No" (I also said that I would be in later). He also was not helped or reminded to wash up or comb his hair.

I wonder if they would had let him go days without eating if someone wouldn't be there to advocate for him?

So tonight before I left we discussed what he wanted for breakfast and I wrote it on a big sheet of paper and taped it to the nurses computer in his room.
I know hospitals are understaffed and the staff is underpaid but good grief you would think they would take the time to look at his chart and now he can't make decisions to leave the hospital on his own. I am so sorry you had to deal with this but hopefully he feels better once the pneumonia is under control.
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Old 05-07-2016, 09:21 AM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,874 posts, read 17,190,006 times
Reputation: 40746
Default Update May 7, 10:30 AM AARRGGG!!! Hospitals!

Update May 7, 10:30 AM AARRGGG!!! Hospitals!

My husband was fine when I left him last night. We talked about where he was and that I was going home to get a good nights sleep and that I would be back by 11 AM. I also wrote a note for him saying "I am in the hospital. I will sleep at the hospital. My wife will pick me up at 11 AM." and I had him sign it.

Well the hospital called me two times in the middle of the night because he was agitated so I could calm him down. Basically, just reading the note helped. When they called for the third time at 7:30 AM I said that I would come and pick him up and they should get his discharge papers ready.

Well, it is now 10:30 AM and they can't discharge him because the doctor did not fill out her paperwork yet.

Arrrggg!!!!
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Old 05-07-2016, 09:43 AM
 
Location: Wonderland
44,296 posts, read 35,841,586 times
Reputation: 62644
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
Yes, it is possible that the doctor was embarrassed that she missed his pneumonia on Tuesday when it was so bad on Wednesday that he needed to be hospitalized.
This exactly - wow, they have mishandled his care.
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Old 05-07-2016, 12:22 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,874 posts, read 17,190,006 times
Reputation: 40746
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
Yes, it is possible that the doctor was embarrassed that she missed his pneumonia on Tuesday when it was so bad on Wednesday that he needed to be hospitalized.
I talked to the on-call doctor & the nurse about that. They both said that it was not unusual for pneumonia to sudden flare up within 24 hours. The doctor did say on Tuesday that his while his white blood cell count was normal it was high normal or borderline.
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Old 05-07-2016, 12:28 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,874 posts, read 17,190,006 times
Reputation: 40746
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
Update May 7, 10:30 AM AARRGGG!!! Hospitals!

My husband was fine when I left him last night. We talked about where he was and that I was going home to get a good nights sleep and that I would be back by 11 AM. I also wrote a note for him saying "I am in the hospital. I will sleep at the hospital. My wife will pick me up at 11 AM." and I had him sign it.

Well the hospital called me two times in the middle of the night because he was agitated so I could calm him down. Basically, just reading the note helped. When they called for the third time at 7:30 AM I said that I would come and pick him up and they should get his discharge papers ready.

Well, it is now 10:30 AM and they can't discharge him because the doctor did not fill out her paperwork yet.

Arrrggg!!!!
They discharged him about noon. We are home now and are both going to go to sleep.
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Old 05-07-2016, 12:31 PM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
3,740 posts, read 4,195,953 times
Reputation: 6861
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626 View Post
I talked to the on-call doctor & the nurse about that. They both said that it was not unusual for pneumonia to sudden flare up within 24 hours. The doctor did say on Tuesday that his while his white blood cell count was normal it was high normal or borderline.
Did anyone say what type of pneumonia he had? I mean, they took cultures, right?
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