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As you can see, there is a lot of confusion about the situation and what kind of input you're asking for. Can you please try to give us all the details about who is alive, who is dead, what did the will say, why is there a conservatorship, who is the subject of the conservatorship, etc.? If you do not know the answer to these questions, our advice will be to find out the answers. Because otherwise, you're operating in the dark as much as we are.
March of 2017 my father died. the original caretaker may or may not have been his choice for a conservator. my father was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, and vulnerable.
there was discussion of 'half each' for us siblings while my father was alive. i don't know what amount was willed to our mom.
my sister handles the conservator duties, including mom's care at home.
If a person dies with a will that will is public record which anyone may get a copy of once it has been filed by the executor. Anyone can get a copy, even non-relatives. But of course you need to know who the executor is and whether they have recorded that legally.
If your father had a lawyer that is the person to ask who the executor is.
If your parents were married at his death then the person who is handling your mothers needs would be a good person to ask about your fathers will. Your mother with dementia should have a guardian/conservator. If this person is a lawyer that's a way to spend a LOT of money, they bill his/her estate by the hour. You don't pay anything to ask questions but may need your own attorney to get answers.
It would be worth a couple hundred dollars to know what the current situation is because you could set things right at the beginning instead of trying to fix a mess later.
If your father had enough money to set up a trust then you have no right to see the trust papers, they are private and will not be made public ever unless the people named in the trust choose to do so.
Again you can ask your fathers lawyer whether there is a will or a trust. Generally a trust will also have a will to take take of small money but the big money will be in the trust, probably for your mothers benefit but there will be heirs after her death.
Talk to a real lawyer (not internet opinion) in the county that he died in. Papers will be filed at that county courthouse (unless it's a trust). Since your relatives are not responding having an attorney will get a response and/or make them take you seriously.
March of 2017 my father died. the original caretaker may or may not have been his choice for a conservator. my father was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, and vulnerable.
there was discussion of 'half each' for us siblings while my father was alive. i don't know what amount was willed to our mom.
my sister handles the conservator duties, including mom's care at home.
The conservator is charged with taking care of your mom's finances for her care. Since your mom is incapacitated, a new will can't be written by her or by her conservator. If they are sending you papers regarding your father's estate and something about your share, they will probably send you a letter to sign to acknowledge that you are in receipt of a check representing your proceeds from his estate. An executor has to file a ledger called the final accounting with the court that will include checks and paper receipts for each payment listed in the ledger.
Did your father have a will? Who is the executor? Have you seen a copy of the will? Do you know if the will has been probated? Do you know if your father had an attorney he regularly used?
March of 2017 my father died. the original caretaker may or may not have been his choice for a conservator. my father was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, and vulnerable. there was discussion of 'half each' for us siblings while my father was alive. i don't know what amount was willed to our mom. my sister handles the conservator duties, including mom's care at home.
The written will rules. Just because Dad said "half each" to his children verbally, if his will says "my entire estate goes to my wife" both of you are out of luck. Also, if he did not have a will then his estate is divided according to the laws of your state.
Heck, you could have been told verbally for decades that something would be yours when someone dies. But if their will said something different that was what would happen to the estate.
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon
Did your father have a will? Who is the executor? Have you seen a copy of the will? Do you know if the will has been probated? Do you know if your father had an attorney he regularly used?
I am still confused. What exactly is your question? Here's what I think I'm reading:
Your dad had a will and you are supposed to get money. (Who is the executor of the will?)
Your mom has a conservator -- your sibling.
So if this is correct, you should be able to communicate with the executor of the will to find out what is going on there. And as for your mom, you have no legal right to be involved in your mom's finances.
Could you PLEASE answer the questions that have been asked?? Is the above correct?
the caretaker seems to be wanting to know everything about this inheritance issue; is that appropriate behavior?
Do you mean that the paid caregiver is nosy about personal family finances and personal family business?
If yes, that normally is a big red flag. As long as their paychecks aren't bouncing it is none of their business.
It probably should be reported to their boss. Most agencies have very strict rules about stealing from clients as well as asking about finances and getting involved in "personal family business".
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