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Old 03-10-2019, 01:37 PM
 
21,108 posts, read 13,405,215 times
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There are some procedures that have to be done. Inventory sheet, and a couple other items. It's not going to take a long time, I was just saying I can't sell it today or tomorrow.

The Aunt that has been mostly observing and keeping opinions to herself said she talked to her attorney son and I will not like what I have to do. And it's something I have to be ready to live with.

Sell the house, give him X number of days to vacate, etc. APS lady told her he does have money. She asked how much and she wouldn't say, only that he does have money in the back, is 'financially secure' as part of her case that in every manner, he can take care of himself.

She asked me to give her a few days. Cousin comes back into town next week. Asked me to please not go to other attorney, please let her try a softer approach with my Dad, her brother.

She is concerned about my brother, but since we can't reach him she has shifted to protecting me and her brother.

It's not going to hurt anything to let her do that, and it's far better our family to do it this way if possible.

Every article I read about 'squabbling heirs' warns of the toll it takes on a family to fight. Don't I know it.

 
Old 03-10-2019, 01:43 PM
 
21,108 posts, read 13,405,215 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wasel View Post
He will have proceeds from the house to pay for his care in an ALF or whatever. Then when he runs out he will move to SNF and Medicaid pays.
That isn't what he is doing, though. He is transferring assets to Bob. To put a new house in his name. I have no understanding of why unless those are Bob's conditions.
 
Old 03-10-2019, 01:56 PM
 
21,108 posts, read 13,405,215 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
Actually the estate CAN sell the house right now.

Was your brother talking about a buyer for just his half or a buyer for the whole thing for $80k?
The whole thing. So I didn't believe him. That he'd accept this. I think it's a scam. They somehow show me only $40K, but then the rest is to be paid to him under the table somehow or something. IDK. But to test him I said if you will take $40, I'll buy you out for that. Silence. $50K? Long silence again. I said just as I thought, bye! 'Oh no, I am considering it. I may wish for you to buy me out for $50-$60K. Games. All games.
 
Old 03-10-2019, 02:15 PM
 
21,108 posts, read 13,405,215 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GotHereQuickAsICould View Post
There are indeed decent handicapped accessible places for rent by the week. Every Residence Inn has handicap accessible units.

Why would the OP be paying for it? Either the brother pays for it, or it comes out of the estate as part of the expense of selling the house and settling the estate.

Brother has been clear that he wants to sell and get his half. So does the OP, who is also the executor of the will.

Whether her father, the attorney, is up to speed or not makes little difference. She has the responsibility to execute their mother's will.
There is no money in the estate, but yes if I have to spend I'd get it back before proceeds are distributed.
Quote:
She has the responsibility to execute their mother's will
Which is what I told my brother but because he has schemes, that is why he is trying trying all the time to do anything BUT follow those procedures.

Up until last Monday it's just been useless talk. I'm doing this, no I am doing that. I stated just saying ok to whatever because it made no difference until now.

Balls are rolling and we are headed to a resolution. It just won't be easy because he will obstruct any way he can the whole way.

He already started. 'I won't permit a realtor. I do not want to pay the commission fee. I will not agree if we do not do for sale by owner.'

I said my friend isn't charging me 6%. Back and forth a few other things, I knew that wasn't the real objection. He said ONE real thing. 'This is going to suck. You have your ways and I have mine and it will be so good when we go our separate ways'.

I refrained from losing my temper and saying it doesn't make a difference what you agree to or not. I did say I am really mad right now. You made a federal case to APS lady that I was lying about your plans and here you are at me about them. Just leave me alone right now. We'll talk about this next week.
 
Old 03-10-2019, 02:35 PM
 
Location: Virginia
10,043 posts, read 6,305,219 times
Reputation: 27493
Quote:
Originally Posted by jencam View Post
There is no money in the estate, but yes if I have to spend I'd get it back before proceeds are distributed.


Which is what I told my brother but because he has schemes, that is why he is trying trying all the time to do anything BUT follow those procedures.

Up until last Monday it's just been useless talk. I'm doing this, no I am doing that. I stated just saying ok to whatever because it made no difference until now.

Balls are rolling and we are headed to a resolution. It just won't be easy because he will obstruct any way he can the whole way.

He already started. 'I won't permit a realtor. I do not want to pay the commission fee. I will not agree if we do not do for sale by owner.'

I said my friend isn't charging me 6%. Back and forth a few other things, I knew that wasn't the real objection. He said ONE real thing. 'This is going to suck. You have your ways and I have mine and it will be so good when we go our separate ways'.

I refrained from losing my temper and saying it doesn't make a difference what you agree to or not. I did say I am really mad right now. You made a federal case to APS lady that I was lying about your plans and here you are at me about them. Just leave me alone right now. We'll talk about this next week.
Your brother doesn't get to dictate to you how, why, or even the fact that you CAN sell the house, period. You're the executrix and have the right to do so. Your emotional resistance to "putting him on the street" is another matter that is unrelated to the legalities of selling the house. It would be best to separate the two.
 
Old 03-10-2019, 02:47 PM
 
21,108 posts, read 13,405,215 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bungalove View Post
Your brother doesn't get to dictate to you how, why, or even the fact that you CAN sell the house, period. You're the executrix and have the right to do so.
I understand. It would only escalate things to SAY that though. It's starting a power struggle. No need. If I do it I just do it, not talk him into it or argue about it.

Quote:
Your emotional resistance to "putting him on the street" is another matter that is unrelated to the legalities of selling the house. It would be best to separate the two.
Yuppers. Understanding probate procedures and following them is the easy part. It's all this other.
 
Old 03-10-2019, 03:24 PM
 
51,567 posts, read 25,482,936 times
Reputation: 37727
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
It is NOT incorrect - the executor of the estate can put together a sale and the estate can sell the house and the proceeds go into an estate account which is then divided among the heirs.

Ask me how I know this. Or don't - doesn't matter but the fact is that the estate can sell the property now.

If you already have a buyer lined up, that simplifies things. But if you are going to list the property and have realtors show it, having your brother and Bob and some druggies there is NOT a good idea and will definitely put a massive damper on the whole showing thing. And the price. If it even gets shown.
If both the OP and her brother want to obtain a reasonable amount for the house, he and the assorted "servants" need to move out so the place can be cleaned up and ready to show.

Or they can take a lot less and sell it to one of the "We buy ugly houses" outfits.

Either way, he has to move, so might as well get on with it.
 
Old 03-10-2019, 03:26 PM
 
51,567 posts, read 25,482,936 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jencam View Post
I understand. It would only escalate things to SAY that though. It's starting a power struggle. No need. If I do it I just do it, not talk him into it or argue about it.

...
You both want to sell the house. Right?

So where is the "power struggle" in communicating with him about the steps necessary to do that?

Surely, you don't mean to sell the house and tell him about it later.
 
Old 03-10-2019, 03:32 PM
 
21,108 posts, read 13,405,215 times
Reputation: 19717
Quote:
Originally Posted by GotHereQuickAsICould View Post
You both want to sell the house. Right?

So where is the "power struggle" in communicating with him about the steps necessary to do that?

Surely, you don't mean to sell the house and tell him about it later.
I addressed this question above.
 
Old 03-10-2019, 03:36 PM
 
26,476 posts, read 36,301,263 times
Reputation: 29493
Quote:
Originally Posted by jencam View Post
I addressed this question above.
So now you're going to sell the house without telling him about it?

Seems like the only fair thing to do is let him know so he can make other plans. You don't have to go back and forth with him over it.
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