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I have a 16 (nearly 17!) year old cat. She eats well, is still fairly active, poops normally, etc. Her blood levels are way off and have been so for over a year. Ive been told several times that she only has a few months left in her. She gets around, but I notice that she looks more stiff than usual. She also doesn't jump onto anything more than a foot or so high anymore. She pees constantly, which I know means that her kidney function is decreasing. I'm starting to think- do I let her keep going as long as she can until she passes on her own? Is there a point where I will need to make that decision for her? And if so, where is it? When she stops eating? When she has serious trouble walking? I always hear of people putting their dogs down when they have similar issues, but now so much with cats. I know this is fairly morbid, but I don't want her to suffer. For now her quality of life seems good, but with what the vets keep saying to me each time we do bloodwork its hard for me to continue without considering it.
I had to put my little Jethro down a week and a half ago. Our situation was a little different, as he had had surgery for cancer two years ago. After that, I made the decision that, unless something urgent and awful came up, I would *not* be taking him to the vet and having him poked and prodded for them to tell me that the cancer had spread. But, I also asked myself "how will I know?" as we continued to muddle through day by day.
I said that I would decide when he didn't eat and wasn't the first one to meet me at the door at night. Sure enough, one Monday, he didn't eat too much. I came home the next night, and he didn't meet me at the door. I went over to where he was laying in the kitchen, and he looked up at me. It's hard to explain how or why, but at that moment I *knew*. We went to the vet the next day... He was almost 16 years old.
My advice to you is to have faith that, if you are in tune with your little kitty (which I have no doubt you are), that you WILL know when it's time. I'd choose one or two things that she loves to do, and use those as your subjective "benchmarks". Of course, you don't want her to suffer, but you also need something that's non-emotional to measure it by.
I wish you the best. I know how hard it is. If you need to chat, please feel free to DM me.
In my opinion this is the hardest thing a human has to do. The little cats are in our hands. I had to put my best friend of 18 years to death after his long bout with lung cancer. And, it made me think a lot about this subject. With our elder relatives, we talk about "when to pull the plug" blah, blah, blah. But the real truth is that with the end of a human's life, we really have no say. the doctor or the hospital does not ask you if there is really a question about it. A person has to meet the criteria of death BEFORE they ask you what you want to do.
Not so with our little cats. We have the power to make a wrong decision. And that is why it is so very hard. Their lives are in our hands. I was more conflicted about Pedro's death than any decision I made my whole life. But there was a moment of clarity for me, thank God. And, I was blessed by a home visit vet so I could hold Pedro in his favorite sunny spot in the house in my arms as he slipped off to sleep with the first drug.
You have every bit of empathy I can express - all of you who have gone through this terrible thing do. And you are in my prayers.
I have a 16 (nearly 17!) year old cat. She eats well, is still fairly active, poops normally, etc. Her blood levels are way off and have been so for over a year. Ive been told several times that she only has a few months left in her. She gets around, but I notice that she looks more stiff than usual. She also doesn't jump onto anything more than a foot or so high anymore. She pees constantly, which I know means that her kidney function is decreasing. I'm starting to think- do I let her keep going as long as she can until she passes on her own? Is there a point where I will need to make that decision for her? And if so, where is it? When she stops eating? When she has serious trouble walking? I always hear of people putting their dogs down when they have similar issues, but now so much with cats. I know this is fairly morbid, but I don't want her to suffer. For now her quality of life seems good, but with what the vets keep saying to me each time we do bloodwork its hard for me to continue without considering it.
It sounds to me like your kitty is still enjoying her life. There is plenty you can do for her to keep it that way.
Is there any particular reason you are not treating the kidney disease? Sub q fluids could make her feel much more comfortable and prolong her quality of life for some time to come.
Cosequin for cats can help with arthritis pain and stiffness. Is she taking that?
I don't like that your vet seems to be focusing on negative things rather than prescribing treatments to keep her quality of life going.
Your kitty will let you know when she's had enough. When she no longer takes any interest in the things she loves. When she goes off in a dark corner and hides away all the time. When she lies still and stares blankly at the wall. Perhaps if she becomes incontinent. That would be awful for a cat, they are so fastidious.
Devote as much time as you can to being with her, doing whatever she loves best. The more deeply you bond to her now, the more in tune you will be for when she's giving you the signal that she's ready to go.
When she begins to fail, don't make the mistake of keeping her alive for yourself. It hurts terribly to give that Final Kindness, that final act of love, but it can be the most important one of all. I've been through it 6 times so far over the past 30 years. It never gets any easier, but knowing I've spared them suffering means something, anyway.
Look, I'm in no great mental shape w/ anxiety to advise. But I'll say this: keep her as long as you can. If she truly is suffering or miserable w/ zero quality life then yes, you must deal at that time w/ it. It seems like others say, that she is still enjoying herself somewhat, so thus I'd love her & make her happy til she can no longer feel ok at all.
Again very tough call here as there's tons threads re: this but hang in there & pm any of us for support. I know this after going thru trying to keep our guy alive, that it is a challenge when too far gone but until then -- it can be done. PM me if you need more info.
I'm kinda tired here tonight but am very partial to this topic, & will do all I can to give you guidance from my experiences. Be relaxed & happy she's still ok, & enjoy every second you can loving her. After all, she's YOUR baby, & irreplaceable to you, so think this thru w/ many consults prior to any further action. Be good.
If she pees constantly, what must her quality of life be? I had to say goodby to my Siggy in January due to kidney failure. He was 15. His brother is still going strong.
I've had to say goodby to several cats over the last four decades, and it never gets any easier. I know it's hard (the understatement of the year), but think of her quality of life first.
I said that I would decide when he didn't eat and wasn't the first one to meet me at the door at night. Sure enough, one Monday, he didn't eat too much. I came home the next night, and he didn't meet me at the door. I went over to where he was laying in the kitchen, and he looked up at me. It's hard to explain how or why, but at that moment I *knew*. We went to the vet the next day.
I think they are very good at letting you know.
Two and a half years ago we had to put down our dog that we had for 17 years. I member of our family she grew up with our kids seeing them from grade school to.. she was the best dog in the world.
Her eating was way down, she had problems getting up and one morning as she started down the back steps she fell. It was just three steps something she would have easily cleared in a single bound but she lost her footing and tumbled. I knew it was getting close.
Then, one night when I was laying with her on the floor, she just let me know it was her time. I made an appointment with the vet on Monday morning and we spent the weekend doing all those things we loved to do. We took a very slow and short walk around the duck pond, we visited neighbors and even got our favorite treat a vanilla ice cream from the DQ drive through.
Very hard to do but it was the greatest kindness I could do for a very good friend.
K9h39, we here have not the answer you seek. Yes, we can support you and show you our compassion for the position you find yourself in, the hardest one in my book, a cat lover can experience.
My advice? Sit down with your baby and "talk" to her. Look into her eyes. Just empty your mind and slowly and methodically stroke her body, and just allow what happens next to just happen. She will tell you, she knows. Hold her close to your body and tell her in action and word how very much you love her and what she means to you. The rest will unfold......
I don't recommend a super-hero effort at this point with fluids and meds. She has lived a long quality life thus far, and you just don't want to stress her out at this point in her life.
You stressed quality of life. If she is exhibiting signs of pain or being uncomfortable, which I think she is by what you have written here, her quality of life which she has greatly enjoyed, has become compromised.
Again, your beloved angel will tell you what the next step is, and you will "know" what to do and when to do it. You are in my prayers. Peace.
Sub q and cosequin are not super hero efforts they are simple ways to make a senior kitty with CRF and arthritis more comfortable.
We are in agreement about talking to her and asking her to tell the op when. They do tell us. Just like they choose us in the beginning, they tell us when they've had enough.
I think what was meant by GOE is costly medical efforts to buy time, the same way humans near death are plugged into all sorts of monitors and machinery to no discernible end.
My "Weasie" has regained a noticeable amount of agility, at 18, from regular dustings of wet food with "Dasuquin," an arthritis-relief supplement similar to "Cosequin" and made by the same company. Whether she actually realizes what it is that's made jumping onto furniture and climbing steps easier is doubtful, but she loves the stuff - nudges other food aside to get at it! For about a dollar a day it's money well spent.
The vet says Weeze is doing so well that I can forgo the twice-a-year visits he normally suggests for senior cats; "Just her usual annual check-up and rabies booster are fine for now." She's full of life and loving it. In fact, she was handling her compromised mobility in the usual trouper fashion until cat-owned neighbors clued me in to what I call her "arthritis powders."
After nearly two decades with my white-chinned gray tabby chatterbox I'm confident that I'll know when she's nearing her time to go. Whether this will be handled rationally and selflessly is an open question.
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