Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
My daughter is newly married. She has one cat. Her husband has two. All females and all grown. Khloe(my daughter's) is pissing on the rugs, scattering litter everywhere and hissing at the other cats. She hides under the bed in the master bedroom and is tearing up the netting under the boxspring. The litter is in the bathroom and so is her food and water because she refuses to leave the bedroom. She tries to prevent the other two cats from entering. The room is starting to smell bad and my daughter is in tears. It seems Khloe is taking over the bedroom! Khloe is new to the house. The other two have been living there all along. The younger one of the two used to intimidate Khloe and Khloe would hide. Now khloe is standing her ground but in a negative way. HELP
It can sometimes be one of the hardest things to do to blend cats into a new family. But know that it's possible!
Probably restarting from the beginning is perhaps the best option which means using a Introduction Process that includes initial separation. Presuming the bathroom where Khloe's food and litter is kept is off the master bedroom, I would shut the bedroom door so that Khloe has a space that won't be "invaded" by the others.
First things first, I would thoroughly clean the bedroom and bathroom floors and walls and wash any rugs she's peed on with an enzymatic cleaner to get rid of the smell. Certainly that's time-consuming, but it's necessary. Although the odors will only be gone from our noses, the smells that Khloe's nose will detect will be much weaker. And these smells include not just her urine, but also the scents of the other cats. For Khloe to feel comfortable and to calm down, she needs to see and smell that her space is safe.
Peeing, scattering litter, hissing are all high-stress indicators, so that's the first part of the process to de-stress Khloe. Don't let the other cats into the bedroom, and turn the bedroom into a pleasant place for Khloe with toys and napping places. Both your daughter and her husband should play with her in there. This is a bit of a sacrifice for humans, but the end result will make it worth it. This separation part of the process is temporary, but it could take some time from a week to a month (or more or less) depending on Khloe.
Once Khloe is feeling safe (and that will be shown by no more territory marking, litter scattering, etc.), the next step is to start feeding her closer and closer to the closed bedroom door and to feed the other cats on the other side of the closed bedroom door. This part of the process starts to build an association that one of the basic survival needs that's hardwired - food - can still be met even though there are perceived "dangers" on the other side of the door. Khloe's confidence will rise as she learns that the cats on the other side of the door might not be so "dangerous" at all.
That's what this whole Introduction Process is all about -- confidence building.
Face-to-face intros come later. When that time comes I'm thinking maybe start with only one of your son-in-law's cats, maybe whichever one is less dominant. This part of the process has a number of steps, too, and can be described later in a "Part B" when that time comes.
It's hard enough for newlyweds to adjust to a new life! Hopefully we here at the Cats Forum can at least help with the kitties' adjustment!
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
