Dilemma with neighbor's cat (weight, kidney, blood, drinks)

[saibot]

Thanks so much for all your kind words and advice. I have been inclining all along toward keeping her and never telling the neighbor, but my husband thinks we should talk to her, and that maybe the cat would be happier back in her old home. I will show him your replies. Roxy (I know that is her name) is very quiet and doesn't move around much, but she still likes to eat--we bought some senior cat food which she loves-- uses the litterbox, and loves to be petted. As soon as my hand approaches her head she starts to purr! My daughter and I are just trying to love on her as much as possible, because I don't think she has had any affection for a long time.

As long as she doesn't seem to be really in pain (and I know it can be hard to tell, with cats) I want to keep her. We do have three other cats in a small house. Eventually they will have to be introduced, as we can't keep the bathroom door permanently closed, and I hope that is not too traumatic for Roxy. My three are all young and are used to living with other cats, so it's not such a problem for them. I also have to win my husband over.

Still haven't seen the neighbor around. I am so glad my daughter found Roxy, as if she'd been left outside for these last few hot days she would probably be either dead or greatly suffering under a bush somewhere. It is just hard knowing that we won't have her long. She is so sweet and it makes me so sad and angry to think about how she must have been living. Hope we can make the rest of her time peaceful.

[Annie1004]

Originally Posted by saibot

Thanks so much for all your kind words and advice. I have been inclining all along

Still haven't seen the neighbor around. I am so glad my daughter found Roxy, as if she'd been left outside for these last few hot days she would probably be either dead or greatly suffering under a bush somewhere. It is just hard knowing that we won't have her long. She is so sweet and it makes me so sad and angry to think about how she must have been living. Hope we can make the rest of her time peaceful.

(Snipped by me)

You already are making Roxy's life filled with love. I am sitting here in tears thinking about that poor girl and what kind of life she had with that thoughtless $&#%*><||#%!!! And what you are doing for Roxy is beyond wonderful. She's letting you know with her purrs and sweetness. If there is a reason for everything, then Roxy was meant to be found by your daughter and you.

Bless you for caring.

[TerraDown]

I agree whole heartedly with all the cat lovers here. I would never tell the neighbor, I would keep this poor creature and give her a loving send-off when the time comes.
The neighbor has lost all animal mastery privileges.
It would be cruel for you to return poor Roxy to your neighbor.

[mawipafl]

Saibot - I do understand your husband's opinion. I can understand how it does seem wrong not to tell the owner of something that you've now taken ownership. It does feel like a sense of stealing. So, in Roxy's case, morally there can appear to be a right and a wrong.

Sort of using an extreme set of analogies, if a neighbor's toddler was heading down a driveway toward the street unsupervised, the right choice would be to go get the toddler even if we had never met nor spoken to the neighbor before. We'd bring the child to the neighbor's door. That's an intervention regarding a human life. We would probably do the same if we saw a wandering dog or cat who looked lost. We'd retrieve the animal from danger and look for the owner. If a trash barrel or plastic chair was rolling down the street, we might or might not retrieve it and seek its owner. Inanimate objects are treated in a different way.

If it was a common occurrence for the toddler to be out unsupervised and often in danger, after retrieving the child we probably would not confront the neighbor about it and would instead call social services or if imminent danger make a call to 911. With animals one could call animal control, but they're not always able to be as fast-acting and the animal would remain in a life-threatening dangerous situation. With humans we have no right to physically get involved, but when it comes to animals, the rules are quite different. What sometimes feels morally wrong is actually morally right.

An abuser loses all rights. In the case of Roxy, her previous "owners" have lost all rights, and that includes being told where she is. The whereabouts of spouses or children of abusers in protective services is kept secret, and Roxy in essence is in protective services.

Here's the last bit of logic. The neighbors obviously do not even care where Roxy is if they haven't even asked about her by now. That one fact alone defines which of your choices is morally the right one. Not intending to offend your husband's question about the cat's happiness, because it is a wonderfully compassionate trait to care enough to think about it, but it's clear as bell where Roxy is happy and where she would be unhappy, where she can live out a deserved peaceful and loving life (and she is a life and not an inanimate trash barrel) and where she would suffer unbearably.

[Three Wolves In Snow]

I don't usually advocate this but in this situation:

Keep that cat. Don't say a word to the neighbor. Heck with them. That cat deserves to have some dignity in her last days.

[=^..^=]

Originally Posted by saibot

......

.....What would you do? Quietly keep the cat, give the cat back to the neighbor when she comes home, or talk to the neighbor and ask if we can keep the cat?

I would quietly keep the cat and not say anything to anyone.

[smitten]

The only part that gives me pause is whether or not your daughter went into the neglectful neighbor's own yard and took the cat, or if it was a different neighbor's house where the cat was found. I'm not clear on that...

In any event, your daughter found a sick, abandoned stray and brought it home, where it received food and shelter and love and care. The end. However, you shouldn't assume the cat is not long for this world. I do think you owe it to the new cat (and your other cats) to take it to the vet for a checkup.

[saibot]

According to my daughter, Roxy was wandering around her owner's yard, meowing loudly. When she saw my daughter coming up the sidewalk, she walked right up to her and let her pick her up. So my daughter didn't actually go into the yard.

I have to agree that she should go to a vet. She is looking amazingly better, now that we've brushed her and she's had some good food for a few days--still thin and bony and her fur is thin, but not like she's going to pass away any minute. It may be that the neighbor was not giving her food that she could handle very well. She really needs a pate style food and while I don't know what she was getting before, the people next door are home so little that I can't really imagine they were opening cans for her. More likely they had a bowl full of dry food left out.

Here's a picture of her. Her long fur kind of obscures of thin she is, but you can see places near the tail where we cut out mats. I'm working on the mats on her belly, one at a time, trying to be gentle and not traumatize her.

[subject2change]

Your story made me want to cry. You're giving that girl the best home she ever had. Even though it seems like they wouldn't care where she was, I wouldn't say a word. People can be funny, and they might not want you to have "their" cat even though they don't really deserve to call her that.

[smitten]

Saibot, she looks like she has hope in her eyes. You've obviously done good by her . I hope you will keep us posted on what the vet says about her health and also let us know how she's acclimating to her new home/kitty siblings.