Will they ever be friends? (kitten, eating, male, blood)

[doglover29]

My resident cat (female, age 4) and my new kitten (4 months) are defintiely not anywhere near being friends yet. I know we've only had the kitten three weeks so far, but the fighting and screeching is getting worse, not better. The kitten wants to play with the older cat and she won't have any of it. In fact, any time the kitten gives her a direct stare she slaps him upside the head and growls. And if the kitten touches her she immediately licks the spot he touched.

They are sharing food bowls and litter boxes, and will always eat their wet food from the same bowl at the same time. They will also eat treats from the same bowl at the same time. And they sleep within a foot of each other. But we haven't made any progress at all in two weeks.

I just feel bad because my older cat is obviously stressed and the kitten isn't getting the playtime from the older cat he needs--although I give them both lots of play time.

Any thoughts? I know this can take months, but there is so much growling and screeching around here all the time.

[SouthernBelleInUtah]

Your older cat probably needs some alone time. Feliway has also helped some cats calm down. This is something that time will fix, if they can co-exist, which it sounds like they are. Justas some feople never become friends, so too some animals of the same species just don't like each other much. Good luck!

[tagylyn]

Originally Posted by doglover29

My resident cat (female, age 4) and my new kitten (4 months) are defintiely not anywhere near being friends yet. I know we've only had the kitten three weeks so far, but the fighting and screeching is getting worse, not better. The kitten wants to play with the older cat and she won't have any of it. In fact, any time the kitten gives her a direct stare she slaps him upside the head and growls. And if the kitten touches her she immediately licks the spot he touched.

They are sharing food bowls and litter boxes, and will always eat their wet food from the same bowl at the same time. They will also eat treats from the same bowl at the same time. And they sleep within a foot of each other. But we haven't made any progress at all in two weeks.

I just feel bad because my older cat is obviously stressed and the kitten isn't getting the playtime from the older cat he needs--although I give them both lots of play time.

Any thoughts? I know this can take months, but there is so much growling and screeching around here all the time.

I brought in new kitties several times with older kitties. Right now older kitty is feeling her "territory" is being invaded. It will take a little time but they will eventually come to a common ground once they figure out who is the dominant one.
My only suggestion would be is to have (2) litter boxes and seperate them apart from each other and give them seperate bowls to eat out of until they adjust to each other. Older kitty has to accept new kitty before she's start to share her "territory".

[Retired Law 08]

I know when I got the first cat,he was in the house a week before we got the second one. We had to separate them and introduce them slowly
before they got use to each other,I guess it's a territory issue,but it should work out.

[Tesaje]

3 weeks is nothing in cat adjustment time. It took my old boy about 3 months before he stopped hissing at the new kitten. She kept play attacking him and he kept flattening her, but no blood was drawn so I let them sort it out. They are best friends now but it took the better part of a year before they settled down.

Now, I have an extra cat (adult male adopted us) and the female kitten - now fully adult - just hates him. Blows came to blood drawn, so I stepped in to separate them. 3 years later and they still hate each other and on occasion still scratch a nose. The old male and extra cat sort of get along but don't like each other. I keep them separated as much as possible.

If yours are eating out of the same bowl and not drawing blood, give them a lot more time and space to get used to the new animal. The prognosis is good for them settling down, eventually.

[jessiegirl_98]

Sorry, 3 weeks is still too little of time. Expect continued hissing, etc! I've had mine together now for years and even today, my little guy got smacked and hissed at by the older cat, but generally they are friends. Just show both of the attention and it will be OK.

[Yo Meow Ma]

I'd suggest you use Feliway too. It will mellow out the older cat. It might take months for them to become friends. Two of mine are still at each other's throat even after living together for 2 years. For you, things may work out just fine with some patience!

[doglover29]

We left them alone for one night this weekend when we went out of town. I was worried, but everything was fine. They both came downstairs to greet us at the door when we returned from our short trip.

It's been almost 5 weeks now and there's still hissing and slapping. They choose to use the same litter box (we have two) and they choose to eat out of the same food bowls (we have several). They do have periods will they will play chase each other and both seem to enjoy that, but on the other hand there has been no mutual grooming or cuddling together.

It's a good sign that they want to share litter boxes and food, right? And they will sleep on the bed about a foot away from each other.

[tagylyn]

Originally Posted by doglover29

We left them alone for one night this weekend when we went out of town. I was worried, but everything was fine. They both came downstairs to greet us at the door when we returned from our short trip.

It's been almost 5 weeks now and there's still hissing and slapping. They choose to use the same litter box (we have two) and they choose to eat out of the same food bowls (we have several). They do have periods will they will play chase each other and both seem to enjoy that, but on the other hand there has been no mutual grooming or cuddling together.

And they will sleep on the bed about a foot away from each other.

Yes it is a good sign, it took about 4 months for mine to start in with the cuddling and cleaning each other.