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Old 07-11-2010, 03:45 PM
 
4,010 posts, read 8,705,725 times
Reputation: 1580

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Quote:
Originally Posted by NMyTree View Post
That's an insult and I'm sure he knows it is. That's not a "Straight Answer" or a friendly and honest response. In fact, that very well represents what he was talking about. Well done
There you go again... e.g. not giving a "rat"s ass" about what a Southerner has to say. It's actions my dear, not words, that matter. (said in the same joking manner as that which you claimed, when you declared that a Southerner asking you to come to church is only doing it for your money)

I have no need to make insults. Me pappy said never try to help someone who is already doing a fine job of hanging themselves. I'm just having a little fun.
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Old 07-11-2010, 03:54 PM
 
Location: Ballantyne
41 posts, read 46,049 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by lumbollo View Post
There you go again... e.g. not giving a "rat"s ass" about what a Southerner has to say. It's actions my dear, not words, that matter. (said in the same joking manner as that which you claimed, when you declared that a Southerner asking you to come to church is only doing it for your money)

I have no need to make insults. Me pappy said never try to help someone who is already doing a fine job of hanging themselves. I'm just having a little fun.
From what I see...its you hanging yourself! best of luck..Mike is right, time for me to move on..my point has been well proven and I hope the op has found a more accepting place to go...Ciao!
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Old 07-11-2010, 04:56 PM
 
Location: Indian Trail
539 posts, read 1,278,850 times
Reputation: 266
Funny thing, just like NyMet I also grew up on LI and have been here for 4 years now. Like I stated in my other post I see none of the things that others are talking about. I have made lots of friends - quite a few who are from NC- and get along with my neighbors. I have no trouble striking up a conversation with strangers and have had the same done to me.
My friends from the south at times might mention things going on at their church but have never asked me which one I go to.
Then again, when people ask me where I am from I say Indian Trail with a big smile on my face before mentioning that I am from NY.
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Old 07-11-2010, 05:46 PM
 
Location: Union County
5,702 posts, read 8,135,958 times
Reputation: 4708
We get these types of threads all the time and I find it funny how easily the transplants take the bait...

Think about the place you lived your whole life and then think about your reaction to someone moving in thinking their $#@! don't stink, they're smarter, or they're "better" in XYZ way... If you don't think that's the case with some transplants, you're mistaken - I've seen it. It's not just words... body language says so much more then words. Compound that with that the fact that it's a revolving door - so many transplants don't stick and the names/faces just keep changing. Yet the attitudes and accents remain largely the same. Then think of the old history behind the carpetbagging. Then go back deep into those genealogy trees and realize some distant relatives might have actually been involved in a war against each other.

By and large the folks I've met are very pragmatic about all this... I have to look to find issues. I have to find a reason to take offense - which in and of itself is rather silly. In the words of an old sage - "Why can't we all just get along?!"

Frankly, I know how many hardcore Southerners feel about me and the assumptions, but I'd still buy lumbollo a beer and ask him to tell me stories of what this place looked like 20 years ago. We're a speck in the Charlotte timeline right now... so embrace the history - I find that it's a way to begin to bridge the gap. Maybe it's just me personally.
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Old 07-11-2010, 06:04 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,270 posts, read 86,039,386 times
Reputation: 39664
Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeyKid View Post
We get these types of threads all the time and I find it funny how easily the transplants take the bait...

Think about the place you lived your whole life and then think about your reaction to someone moving in thinking their $#@! don't stink, they're smarter, or they're "better" in XYZ way... If you don't think that's the case with some transplants, you're mistaken - I've seen it. It's not just words... body language says so much more then words. Compound that with that the fact that it's a revolving door - so many transplants don't stick and the names/faces just keep changing. Yet the attitudes and accents remain largely the same. Then think of the old history behind the carpetbagging. Then go back deep into those genealogy trees and realize some distant relatives might have actually been involved in a war against each other.

By and large the folks I've met are very pragmatic about all this... I have to look to find issues. I have to find a reason to take offense - which in and of itself is rather silly. In the words of an old sage - "Why can't we all just get along?!"

Frankly, I know how many hardcore Southerners feel about me and the assumptions, but I'd still buy lumbollo a beer and ask him to tell me stories of what this place looked like 20 years ago. We're a speck in the Charlotte timeline right now... so embrace the history - I find that it's a way to begin to bridge the gap. Maybe it's just me personally.

Fortunately, it's not just you If it were, I'd really despair about Charlotte.

But there are many wonderful newcomers like you from the northeast Mikey - and folks like you are always going to make friends and be very welcome here. The others just refuse to see how they are the source of their own problems fitting in around here.
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Old 07-11-2010, 06:23 PM
 
4,010 posts, read 8,705,725 times
Reputation: 1580
Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeyKid View Post
We get these types of threads all the time and I find it funny how easily the transplants take the bait......
Yes indeedie, Mikey. The fishing has been good today. The catfish have been gutted and cleaned, rolled in cornmeal, and dropped in the deep fry.

I personally have absolutely no issue with where a person comes from, their birthplace, race, heritage, religion, who they sleep with, etc. It means little to me in terms of judging them as a person. It's how they carry themselves and conduct their affairs with others that matter to me. If people want to move to Charlotte that is their business and I don't care but I will suggest, if asked, for them not to have unrealistic expectations once they are here. People are not going to change their ways and plans just because they moved here. I think this is often taken out of context as rudeness, indifference, and so forth by the new arrivals as commented here on this forum.

Mikey in regards to the beer, you sound like a fine person from your posts here and I would have no problem.
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Old 07-11-2010, 06:24 PM
 
Location: Ballantyne
41 posts, read 46,049 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeyKid View Post
We get these types of threads all the time and I find it funny how easily the transplants take the bait...

Think about the place you lived your whole life and then think about your reaction to someone moving in thinking their $#@! don't stink, they're smarter, or they're "better" in XYZ way... If you don't think that's the case with some transplants, you're mistaken - I've seen it. It's not just words... body language says so much more then words. Compound that with that the fact that it's a revolving door - so many transplants don't stick and the names/faces just keep changing. Yet the attitudes and accents remain largely the same. Then think of the old history behind the carpetbagging. Then go back deep into those genealogy trees and realize some distant relatives might have actually been involved in a war against each other.

By and large the folks I've met are very pragmatic about all this... I have to look to find issues. I have to find a reason to take offense - which in and of itself is rather silly. In the words of an old sage - "Why can't we all just get along?!"

Frankly, I know how many hardcore Southerners feel about me and the assumptions, but I'd still buy lumbollo a beer and ask him to tell me stories of what this place looked like 20 years ago. We're a speck in the Charlotte timeline right now... so embrace the history - I find that it's a way to begin to bridge the gap. Maybe it's just me personally.
I have felt the same way and have done a great deal to help the community..sponsored local charities & events with time, services and money....tried fitting in with church..joined some organizations...heck half my family left here because they were treated the same way...never stating anything negative (untill now) to others and even said that if most people got to know me that their first impression would change and I get a "thats ok"....

as far as the poop dont stink...
I rarely see Northerners act that way....nor do I ever act that way. I do see arseholes from everwhere..lol. My point in my comments were to explain my experience of how non accepting the South can be to (most) Northerners without giving any real reason..look at some of the other forums & some people are still fighting the civil war. I truly wanted to live here and make a life...thats all....

Last edited by NyMet; 07-11-2010 at 06:57 PM..
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Old 07-11-2010, 06:28 PM
 
Location: Ballantyne
41 posts, read 46,049 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by lumbollo View Post
Yes indeedie, Mikey. The fishing has been good today. The catfish have been gutted and cleaned, rolled in cornmeal, and dropped in the deep fry.

I personally have absolutely no issue with where a person comes from, their birthplace, race, heritage, religion, who they sleep with, etc. It means little to me in terms of judging them as a person. It's how they carry themselves and conduct their affairs with others that matter to me. If people want to move to Charlotte that is their business and I don't care but I will suggest, if asked, for them not to have unrealistic expectations once they are here. People are not going to change their ways and plans just because they moved here. I think this is often taken out of context as rudeness, indifference, and so forth by the new arrivals as commented here on this forum.
as far as anyone taking the bait...childish to say the least....you certainly didnt bait me...you only proved your ignorance.
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Old 07-11-2010, 06:31 PM
 
Location: Ballantyne
41 posts, read 46,049 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by car421 View Post
Funny thing, just like NyMet I also grew up on LI and have been here for 4 years now. Like I stated in my other post I see none of the things that others are talking about. I have made lots of friends - quite a few who are from NC- and get along with my neighbors. I have no trouble striking up a conversation with strangers and have had the same done to me.
My friends from the south at times might mention things going on at their church but have never asked me which one I go to.
Then again, when people ask me where I am from I say Indian Trail with a big smile on my face before mentioning that I am from NY.
You should not have to lie about where you are from (not saying you are wrong)....but I am happy to see that you are being accepted and I would glady buy you a round of drinks anytime.
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Old 07-11-2010, 06:57 PM
 
Location: State of Being
35,885 posts, read 65,253,264 times
Reputation: 22270
Quote:
Originally Posted by NyMet View Post
I have felt the same way and have done a great deal to help the community..sponsored local charities & events with time, services and money....tried fitting in with church..joined some organizations...heck half my family left here because they were treated the same way...never stating anything negative (untill now) to others and even said that if most people got to know me that their first impression would change and I get a "thats ok"....

as far as the poop dont stink...
I rarely see Northerners act that way....nor do I ever act that way. I do see arseholes from everwhere..lol. My point in my comments were to explain my experience of how non accepting the south is to (most) Northerners without giving any real reason..look at some of the other forums & they are still fighting the civil war. I truly wanted to live here and make a life...thats all....
You just haven't found the right folks to hang out with, NyMet. (I am a Yankees fan, btw, but I won't hold it against you, hee hee).

If you were with me and I felt like you were doing something socially unacceptable (for ex: being too "in yer face") I would just tell ya, and would expect you to do the same for me should I be with you when you were "back home" and I didn't understand something about the local culture you grew up with.

Here is an example of where things get completely off track with newcomers vs. locals.

My parents live in a neighborhood with probably 1/2 newcomers. There is one couple from Long Island who have lived in the neighborhood about 2 years. They have 2 small dogs and walk them 2 x a day. They let their dogs poop in everyone's yard along the way and do not clean up behind them! So my parents are very upset about it. And they are elderly and they can't get out there and bend over and scoop poop daily, nor should they have to (they don't have a dog).

But no one approaches the folks from LI cause they are very abrupt with the neighbors when anyone has tried to talk to them, so no one wants to start a neighborhood issue over their bad habits.

I am going to try to be there when I see them walking their dogs and allowing them to poop in my parent's yard, cause I will simply go out there, confront them and tell them straight on that this is unacceptable and that I am going to start collecting the poop and putting in on their driveway if it doesn't cease.

And that is exactly what I will do.

Passive aggressive behavior would be to collect the poop and put it on their driveway without confronting the folks.

My parents would never confront these folks b/c basically, Southerners do not get confrontational over issues that have to do with "socially acceptable behavior." In other words, in their mind, anyone who would do something that thoughtless is a person who is beyond reasoning with - as no one with any manners or breeding would ever do such a tacky, thoughtless, nasty thing as let their dogs poop in someone else's yard daily.

So there is a difference in sensibilities b/n cultures. I personally suspect if I confront the LI folks and tell them that this is unacceptable and they need to cut it out . . . they will cut it out, lol.

Does that make any sense at all? There is just a difference in the way folks approach each other here . . . and sometimes things get very mixed up in the translation of all that.
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