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Old 06-21-2007, 12:05 PM
 
Location: Charlotte,NC, US, North America, Earth, Alpha Quadrant,Milky Way Galaxy
3,769 posts, read 6,751,702 times
Reputation: 2109

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Quote:
Originally Posted by CharlotteBoundfromMiami View Post
I just wanted to take a moment to say that I really appreciate all of you wonderful people here that are taking the time to help point us out-of-town folks in the right direction. Every time I post, I am overwhelmingly shocked by the amount of replies, and the attention you all put into your responses.

Now, about moving to Clt from Miami. I've been researching this hard-core for weeks now. Even with the cons of moving and living in Charlotte, the pros have made it my dream. Being a new Charlotte resident is in my heart now, and is the place I intend to spend the rest of my life. (Even if it becomes - God forbid - the next Miami.) As some of you know, my husband has been less than enthusiastic about moving again. We just moved (in '05) from central Jersey here. I've hated it here from day one. Soon after our son was born (Nov. 2006), I've been plagued by a depression that only gets worse, even with the treatment I'm on. I've explained to him the stress of living here is making me literally sick. Well, until yesterday, he brushed off my comments about moving, and didn't seem to care how I felt. He balked on our w/e trip, and complained about every date that I proposed to go check out the area. So, now, I'm not sure when in the hell we'll get a chance to go. I'm really feeling so defeated about this whole situation. Just hopeless really

Well, last night, he agreed that we'll move by Dec. 2008. While I'd like to be there yesterday, I considered it a small victory.

I'm sorry this got so long.......but PLEASE keep us in your prayers that everything will work out to make my dream, of a happy healthy future for myself and my family, in Charlotte come true.

Amy
Does your husband likes Miami? I grew up in Miami so I'm a bit tainted by a lot of fond memories of Miami from the 70s/80s and early 90s. What brought you both down from NJ originally?

My wife was similarly like you in wanting to leave Boston (like yesterday type talk), and I typically gave a "will see" answer. I really didn't want to change (not that I was in love with Boston, just change is hard). She was ready to go but I was relatively comfortable where we were (even though a lot of the things around me were annoying me). It wasn't until the first trip that I could actually visualize making a life here so it became more real. When you look from a distance it seems far away and doesn't real feel real. I'll admit though she bugged me (nearly to death) until I conceded to make that first trip (the plan wasn't necessarily Charlotte but rather Raleigh). Hooking up with the family of some friends who were from here, a good RE agent to show us around and taking in a few events like the circus really made me get to the next level.

I think a lot can happen in your trip so hopefully part of the agenda is to have as much fun as possible!

Keep us up to date.
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Old 06-21-2007, 01:51 PM
 
239 posts, read 727,560 times
Reputation: 83
Good luck. I'm in Orlando and my wife H.A.T.E.S it here so much, we're ready for a divorce! I have to admit it is not a place I see myself living in forever, but we are starting to look around in NC, SC, and Texas.

I wish you the best, and know that you are not alone. Lots of other people are struggling to get out of the State of Florida with the property prices, crazy taxes, and generally nasty people.

I tell my wife that it's sad when a couple from Orlando has to travel to Chicago to find "southern hospitality"!

All the best!
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Old 06-21-2007, 02:06 PM
 
164 posts, read 615,417 times
Reputation: 57
To the OP who wants to move and not her husband. Just curious...What does your husband do? And is he going to have to find a new job? If yes, that may be a big concern for him. Good luck.
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Old 06-21-2007, 02:13 PM
 
204 posts, read 707,858 times
Reputation: 107
Amy-your post touched my heart. Hopefully you'll realize your dream by Dec 2008 and hopefully sooner. We moved from central NJ in 2005 to MN-we love our house and town-but I visited our son who lives in Charlotte and fell in love! My husband picked me up at the airport and by the time we reached home we were ready to sell and go. Our home is listed and I just keep praying we can sell and get to Charlotte and closer to our kids and g-kids. Keep the faith Amy and you will get to Charlotte.
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Old 06-21-2007, 02:56 PM
 
Location: NJ for now
1,225 posts, read 2,575,147 times
Reputation: 700
Quote:
Originally Posted by zipbags View Post
To the OP who wants to move and not her husband. Just curious...What does your husband do? And is he going to have to find a new job? If yes, that may be a big concern for him. Good luck.
Thats my biggest concern for myself as well, but I am trying to keep a positive outlook...Goodluck!!!
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Old 06-21-2007, 08:12 PM
 
12 posts, read 33,319 times
Reputation: 14
I have been trying to get my husband to move to N.C. since 2005 so about two years now. We live in So. Ca. - both born and raised here and he works for his brother which is a total nightmare. He has worked for him for 21 years now. His brother takes full advantage of him and is living the rich life in Newport Beach while we are struggling to make ends meet. The disparity is great. I had been looking at N.C. for a few years because I had met some people who had been transferred out here who had lived there at one time or another and everyone I had talked to loved it in N.C. I finally convinced him to take a trip in Oct. 2005, (at this time we were doing a little better financially- it has all gone down hill from there) I loved N.C. and could actually picture us living there. He gave it an 8 which I guess is huge for him. I kept trying to tell him we could cash out on some equity - pay some bills and be able to buy a decent house there and have some money left over to save and do some great things for the kids. Our equity has dwindled a little because time is moving on and prices are coming down a little out here. Most all of my family is scattered on the East Coast and we were always the ones that lived out in CA so I never really got to grow up with my cousins. Sorry to go on and on about my sob story but I am so jealous when both spouses agree to move together. I can tell I will never get him out of here. He is so comfortable working with his brother and is so afraid of change. It makes me kind of sad in a way that he doesn't have the self esteem to move on. I haven't been on for a long time but used to love Miker and Nascar Nancy's posts!
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Old 06-21-2007, 08:19 PM
 
Location: Sunny Phoenix Arizona...wishing for a beach.
4,299 posts, read 13,620,997 times
Reputation: 803
Quote:
Originally Posted by CharlotteBoundfromMiami View Post
I just wanted to take a moment to say that I really appreciate all of you wonderful people here that are taking the time to help point us out-of-town folks in the right direction. Every time I post, I am overwhelmingly shocked by the amount of replies, and the attention you all put into your responses.

Now, about moving to Clt from Miami. I've been researching this hard-core for weeks now. Even with the cons of moving and living in Charlotte, the pros have made it my dream. Being a new Charlotte resident is in my heart now, and is the place I intend to spend the rest of my life. (Even if it becomes - God forbid - the next Miami.) As some of you know, my husband has been less than enthusiastic about moving again. We just moved (in '05) from central Jersey here. I've hated it here from day one. Soon after our son was born (Nov. 2006), I've been plagued by a depression that only gets worse, even with the treatment I'm on. I've explained to him the stress of living here is making me literally sick. Well, until yesterday, he brushed off my comments about moving, and didn't seem to care how I felt. He balked on our w/e trip, and complained about every date that I proposed to go check out the area. So, now, I'm not sure when in the hell we'll get a chance to go. I'm really feeling so defeated about this whole situation. Just hopeless really

Well, last night, he agreed that we'll move by Dec. 2008. While I'd like to be there yesterday, I considered it a small victory.

I'm sorry this got so long.......but PLEASE keep us in your prayers that everything will work out to make my dream, of a happy healthy future for myself and my family, in Charlotte come true.

Amy


Hi Amy. I had the same problem with my husband for over a year, I just kept throwing the pros at him and finally got him to take a trip to Charlotte and then he was in love.
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Old 06-21-2007, 08:33 PM
 
190 posts, read 613,739 times
Reputation: 145
Hello Amy,
8899
Don't get discouraged. I know how you feel, but it's going to be ok. Just keep praying. I used to live in Charlotte in 1989, moved back to Long Island and now I will be moving back to Charlotte this summer. I am leaving all of my family behind, so this is not easy for me, but it's something I have to do.
I really like Charlotte and I know you will too. My heart is longing to be there. I will pray for you that God will open new doors for you and your husband would have a change of heart. Best Wishes.
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Old 06-21-2007, 09:40 PM
 
Location: Trinity Florida
7,928 posts, read 17,754,110 times
Reputation: 1992
We both wanted out of NJ for alot of reasons...There are so many people in the same boat...We left all my family as well, and as we are here 3 weeks only my sister still hasnt called us, and my nephew 5.5 yrs old calls and talks about himself all the time and what my sister bought for him so my kids dont want to speak to him anymore...which is sad...anyway, good Luck keep the faith and think Positive...
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Old 06-22-2007, 09:49 AM
 
31 posts, read 103,453 times
Reputation: 21
Default About dh's career...

He's a stock broker by nature. That's his dream job, and what he was doing (in NYC) when we met (online) in 2000. I moved to be with him (after visiting and long distance dating for a few months). My son (from my first marriage) and I moved in w/him and his parents (in Tinton Falls NJ). He left his job, since the tech bubble burst, and he didn't bring home a check for THREE months. Then he worked for Computer Warehouse a few mo's, got laid off, then worked for Merrill Lynch in a 401k call center. The commute was 50 miles one way, so he looked for something closer and found a job with JP Morgan Chase, selling investment 'instruments'.

For all 4 years there (NJ), he was constantly on me about moving to Miami. He had lived in Miami for a few years in the early 90's, went to school there and had fond memories of it. Well, without researching the lifestyle and home costs here, I found a job in Miami and we put our house on the market. It took NINE months to sell. By that time homes were OUTRAGEOUS in Miami. We finally purchased last year, a home for $485k. The mortgage is sucking us dry. It's interest and escrow only and is $3,300 PER MONTH! Plus, since we didn't research anything, we found out the hard way everything has gotten worse here.

His first job here was at TD Waterhouse, as an investment advisor. Now, he's worked one year at Merrill Lynch (again) as a stock broker's assistant. But he's currently interviewing with USB for a (potentially) larger salary.

But since Charlotte's the 2nd largest banking center in the US, I figure it's the best place for him (in the Finance industry) to get a job. You'd think it would make it desireable for him, right?

He's just very anxious about moving again. So I think we're going to just take it one step at a time....sell first. Investigate and visit, second. Jobs, third, then comes the home search....
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