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Old 05-30-2013, 08:53 PM
 
5,150 posts, read 6,641,674 times
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Tonight at the Mountain Island Wal-Mart there was a family of four holding up a sign asking for money at the parking lot exit. Basically "Help me please I lost my job".

My first thought and question to you is, would you be more apt to hand out money to a stranger if they had their kids with them? My reaction was "yes" but not strong enough to make actually do it.

Then I thought, geeee where's the line when it comes to neglect? There was an infant in a stroller in 80+ heat. Is this too much manipulation or am I too cynical?

Before you answer, I know I'm too cynical but what are you thoughts?
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Old 05-30-2013, 09:28 PM
 
1,670 posts, read 5,799,162 times
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My choice is too give, no matter the circumstance. If I have it to offer, I am not their judge nor their jury. My heart always compel me to give to those whether they need it or not. If I had to guess who needs it most; than most of "us" will never give. If you have the endurance to sit in the hot sun and panhandle and I can afford it; it does not bother me in the least to give. I pass a guy on Independence and Sharon Amity Road constantly; each time, I hand him at least two bottles of water and a few dollars from my heart. People are in dire need and it is not my judge to split them into groups; those who need vs. those who don't. I live by a pure heart--judge no one. If it doesn't cripple me financially than I give. Let's keep the love going...
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Old 05-30-2013, 09:40 PM
 
5,150 posts, read 6,641,674 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brooklyn_QueenBee View Post
My choice is too give, no matter the circumstance. If I have it to offer, I am not their judge nor their jury. My heart always compel me to give to those whether they need it or not. If I had to guess who needs it most; than most of "us" will never give. If you have the endurance to sit in the hot sun and panhandle and I can afford it; it does not bother me in the least to give. I pass a guy on Independence and Sharon Amity Road constantly; each time, I hand him at least two bottles of water and a few dollars from my heart. People are in dire need and it is not my judge to split them into groups; those who need vs. those who don't. I live by a pure heart--judge no one. If it doesn't cripple me financially than I give. Let's keep the love going...
I don't do it with individuals because I think it can make things worse for them. You may not be their judge but you may be buying him his next bottle of Mad Dog. I have a background of charity work and my church is downtown and when I was new I was a mark.

I like the water bottle idea and I've offered to buy a meal instead of giving cash. I prefer need based assistance (preferably privately provided) and that requires some background checking as well as a heart.

I guess it's beyond this topic, but why should someone skip the line because they can utilize a street corner?

I don't know these people's stories but I did stick to my rule. I don't think I could have afforded to feed 4 people right then and they were almost in traffic at the time. That can be tricky too. Stopping for food means you might lose money or maybe someone else already did that.

But there are too many gamers out there and I just question using an infant like that. I have bought food for people that either throw it away or try to get it refunded for cash to buy cigs or booze. I doubt that would be the case here and they didn't look like gypsies but I've dealt with them too. Families traveling in nice cars stopping off at [Agency Name] to get travel help but driving a late model luxury car.

I would buy bus tickets too (CATS). But I think I'd like less entrepreneurship and more equality for the truly needy.
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Old 05-30-2013, 09:48 PM
 
Location: Murica
819 posts, read 640,928 times
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You could just help them get a list of soup kitchens and shelters where they have job placement and education along with care. If they have kids they probably wont be buying drugs or alcohol, but the ~$5 you give them won't last a conservative few days either.

One thing Americans don't know, is what it means to be poor. Poor isn't struggling to pay rent or payments on a car cause you mismanage income while making almost a thousand dollars over your monthly expenses, do to waste or laying out of work..

Whatever you do, don't give to charities. If you want to donate go to a military office or a center for salvation army or the like. I never trust the upper middle class house wives with extreme shopping addictions doing charity drives in public places.. I doubt there is much analysis or oversight by the IRS for them and people in suburbs usually have questionable financial backgrounds and morals anyway, which is how they afford to live there..
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Old 05-30-2013, 11:28 PM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
1,658 posts, read 1,852,855 times
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Saw the exact same thing at the Wal-Mart in University the other day. Wonder of it was the same family.
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Old 05-31-2013, 01:34 AM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
2,352 posts, read 4,026,440 times
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Originally Posted by TJJT View Post
If they have kids they probably wont be buying drugs or alcohol
Aww, so sweetly nave.
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Old 05-31-2013, 05:43 AM
 
7,672 posts, read 9,870,388 times
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There was a lady with an adorable curly haired toddler at Arboretum doing the same thing with a sign asking for rent money and diapers. I went into Harris Teeter to get her a gift card. A lady I knew at the customer service counter asked if it was for a gift and I told her it was for the lady with the toddler. She said that she lives in the apartments behind the store and had food stamps as she buys good there at HT. She also has a husband who works at a mechanic shop as he had on the uniform. She went on to say that they get tons of diapers from people shopping at Wal-Mart. She hates to be cynical but she says it appears they just beg rather spend their own money. It's a shame they rather spend hours being than trying to get a job. And now I am talking specifically of this lady in the parking lot, not others where their situation is different.
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Old 05-31-2013, 05:53 AM
 
Location: Concord, NC
1,210 posts, read 1,935,599 times
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I never give money to people who are standing around asking for it. I don't know what they will do with it. There are enough charities and government programs out there to help these people.
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Old 05-31-2013, 06:16 AM
 
1,111 posts, read 1,686,783 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sepulgeek View Post
I never give money to people who are standing around asking for it. I don't know what they will do with it. There are enough charities and government programs out there to help these people.
Exactly! There are some really good con artists out there, you don't know if they're being sincere or if they just want you to give them money so they can buy drugs or alcohol with the money you worked hard for, you just can't be moved by emotion! The wife and kid angle sounds like the new con!
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Old 05-31-2013, 08:50 AM
 
Location: State of Being
35,885 posts, read 67,029,152 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brooklyn_QueenBee View Post
My choice is too give, no matter the circumstance. If I have it to offer, I am not their judge nor their jury. My heart always compel me to give to those whether they need it or not. If I had to guess who needs it most; than most of "us" will never give. If you have the endurance to sit in the hot sun and panhandle and I can afford it; it does not bother me in the least to give. I pass a guy on Independence and Sharon Amity Road constantly; each time, I hand him at least two bottles of water and a few dollars from my heart. People are in dire need and it is not my judge to split them into groups; those who need vs. those who don't. I live by a pure heart--judge no one. If it doesn't cripple me financially than I give. Let's keep the love going...
You are truly an inspiration. The bottles of water - wonderful idea!

"Cast your bread upon the water."

If I feel moved to help an individual, I do so. Most of the time, tho, I give cash to Salvation Army, as I know they are good stewards and doing work in the community to help the needy.
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