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Since Charlotte is considered a small Atlanta, I was wondering if they have the same problems as Atlanta in dealing with the in flux of men on the DL (Down Low)? Or, for the most part the men are pretty open about their sexuality?
I just gotta know - why would anyone need - or want - to know about how open men are about their sexuality? Seems to me, the whole point of the term "on the DL" is that it is a "secretive" pursuit. So how would one even know if Charlotte has a lot of men on the DL? Same for men being "pretty open about their sexuality." If men were open, then the term DL would never have been coined.
Just b/c a guy is out of the closet about being gay, for example, it is not like you can just "look" at someone and know what his sexual habits are . . . at least . . . I would certainly never presume that (unless I were a man in a gay bar and assuming most other patrons were also gay men).
If someone is on the DL, he is hiding his sexual preferences from the public, so HOW WOULD ANYONE KNOW? And my biggest question, why would anyone care to know (unless you are a female married to a man who indulges such sexual proclivities - and then that is a private, marital issue).
Seems this question is like asking: Since adultery is big in XX city and Charlotte is another Southern city, are there are bunch of men stepping out on their wives in Charlotte?
Who knows? And - why would anyone care if there are men on the DL in Charlotte? Plus - why would anyone make an assumption about Charlotte based on some rumor about Atlanta??? I do not get the point. Maybe I am dense.
I do not know how rampant this is in MA but there is a beautiful road that I drive that connects towns and has beautiful views and people like to hike BUT one of the views that is so very disturbing to me is at any time of the day when you drive through you see men sitting in the rest area waiting for other men to show and they go down through the path with each other. You see men emerging with their work shirts and ties and dress pants straightening themselves out. Everybody knows what is going on. When I do see this, I can't help but wonder how many of these men go home to their unsuspecting wives. It is disgusting.
I just gotta know - why would anyone need - or want - to know about how open men are about their sexuality? Seems to me, the whole point of the term "on the DL" is that it is a "secretive" pursuit. So how would one even know if Charlotte has a lot of men on the DL? Same for men being "pretty open about their sexuality." If men were open, then the term DL would never have been coined.
Just b/c a guy is out of the closet about being gay, for example, it is not like you can just "look" at someone and know what his sexual habits are . . . at least . . . I would certainly never presume that (unless I were a man in a gay bar and assuming most other patrons were also gay men).
If someone is on the DL, he is hiding his sexual preferences from the public, so HOW WOULD ANYONE KNOW? And my biggest question, why would anyone care to know (unless you are a female married to a man who indulges such sexual proclivities - and then that is a private, marital issue).
Seems this question is like asking: Since adultery is big in XX city and Charlotte is another Southern city, are there are bunch of men stepping out on their wives in Charlotte?
Who knows? And - why would anyone care if there are men on the DL in Charlotte? Plus - why would anyone make an assumption about Charlotte based on some rumor about Atlanta??? I do not get the point. Maybe I am dense.
You're not dense. It's just that you may not understand why the OP asked the question. For black women, knowing if a guy is on the DL is important because these women do not want to start a relationship with a guy who is playing hetero but in actuality is bi and actively sleeps with men. These women want to lower their chances of contracting AIDS from men whom commit such behavior. As stated before, black men on the DL is becoming more rampant and as such it is of concern to black women. The OP is probably a single woman moving to Charlotte and she prolly wants to see if the DL issue is as big in Charlotte as it is in ATL. I think it's a fair questions b/c Charlotte has a large black population and it continues to grow.
You're not dense. It's just that you may not understand why the OP asked the question. For black women, knowing if a guy is on the DL is important because these women do not want to start a relationship with a guy who is playing hetero but in actuality is bi and actively sleeps with men. These women want to lower their chances of contracting AIDS from men whom commit such behavior. As stated before, black men on the DL is becoming more rampant and as such it is of concern to black women. The OP is probably a single woman moving to Charlotte and she prolly wants to see if the DL issue is as big in Charlotte as it is in ATL. I think it's a fair questions b/c Charlotte has a large black population and it continues to grow.
Your explanation makes total sense and I think, despite your very kind response, I am dense, LOL!!! When asked w/in the context you described, it is a very fair question.
Thank you for clarifying!
MODERATOR NOTE:
Thank You To All Who Has Contributed To This Thread. The OP Has Been Answered.
Last edited by SunnyKayak; 12-26-2007 at 09:58 PM..
Reason: added moderator note it has no reflection on this poster
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Why would you ask this?
