Need to hear from people who relocated without family (Charlotte: for sale, crime rate)

[DawnW]

I grew up in Kenya. My parents have recently retired and moved to the US, but in the 6 years they have been retired, they have gone back to Kenya 5 times and are headed back in April! My parents are missionaries from the US.

I have been to Johannesburg!

My DH's family is the one with the issue too! I think when you grow up as an international family moving is not as big of a deal.

Dawn

Originally Posted by stmaarten

Dawn, where in Africa did you grow up? I grew up in a small town in the suburbs of Johannesburg, South Africa. My parents have no problem with us moving...it's my husband's family that's having a bit of an issue....

[stmaarten]

Originally Posted by NJmomof2

I just sent someone a birthday card.....

It really isn't her Birthday, but I think you've figured that out already?

[stmaarten]

Originally Posted by DawnW

I grew up in Kenya. My parents have recently retired and moved to the US, but in the 6 years they have been retired, they have gone back to Kenya 5 times and are headed back in April! My parents are missionaries from the US.

I have been to Johannesburg!

My DH's family is the one with the issue too! I think when you grow up as an international family moving is not as big of a deal.

Dawn

Dawn,
I saw your PM, but for some reason I'm having some trouble sending one out to you. We don't live in Charlotte yet, we just recently purchased a home there, so I have not been to the SA store. I'd love to know where it is, though. I love REAL Biltong! Is the Red Tea you're referring to anything like Rooibos? Because I have a box that says "Red Tea" right on the cover.
We used to fly up to Nairobi all the time...is that where you lived? What a beautiful country, South Africa is, I miss it terribly.

[pj.poway]

milaur

Please give the family some time to adjust. How long have you been thinking, dreaming, posting on this board etc. about moving to Charlotte. They have only had four days. It takes time to adjust and accept the change in everyone's life. There is no guarantee that they will adjust but heck give em a chance. Do not be defensive of your choice. At first it felt like I was being rejected by my daugher. Why would she leave me and her brother? We were a team with a goal of doing the best we could together in life. Yeah she married and we like him a lot but why was he stealing our 3rd amigo? In time we adjusted. We listened to the background for their choice and their reasoning. And we accepted the change and their decision. In some ways envious of their courage to make a change and forge ahead. I quickly realize we are still family and we will always be a family!! But they are their own family first now....dang it all anyway...who stole my baby!!! It is a graduation for the parent/family that stays and for the family that is forging their own path. It is UNCOMFORTABLE for awhile. Then it is ok. I delight in the happiness "the kids" have found in Charlotte. I miss them desperately!! What can I say. I raised her to go out on her own and be a strong independent woman....now why the heck is she leaving!! Doesn't momma know best....well I know the answer to that so don't barage me with comments. But I did what parents do, we create a family and a life style and then the kids move on as they should do. Doesn't mean we have to jump for joy!!

Please do not berate where you are coming from! It makes us feel like we aren't good enough. Explain the long process it took for y'all to come to the decision. Answer questions, reassure, tell them you will miss them, thank them for freedom to choice how to live your own life. Remind them how much you love them and will miss them and look forward to their visits and yours to them.

On another the note the very best friends I have made in my life were when my husband and I were living away from home. 30 years after moving to San Diego, they are the best reasons for living here!! Sharing the growth of your children and family make some awesome friends.

And well like I have said I am following the kids to Charlotte next spring and am so happy to hear all of the wonderful stories here and feel like I will make some wonderful friends in Charlotte. that is if a mid50 gramma is welcome.

[charlie22]

Originally Posted by NJmomof2

Hey Everyone,

I am in desperate need to find other people who have relocated without their immediately family brothers or sister/Parents....We are looking to move to Union County and I need to talk to others who have been there for a little while and their family did not follow..My parents are not supportive which I understand Im taking their grandchildren away, and My sister and well she isnt happy about it either....so I need to hear how others deal with it....

Thank You
Staci

I am so glad to see someone else in my same position. I have not relocated yet, but I will relocate in May. My husband and I have gone several times to Union county area since the Summer and we loved it. We are moving from Miami, Fl and are leaving behind all my family. I almost decided not to move but for the sake of my kids I know it is the best decision. My parents also were not supportive of this move. I told them to go during the Christmas break and they loved it, they say they will follow me in about a year or so. They don't believe that moving now is such a great idea since I've had their help since my kids were born.
I am scared of being on "my own" with family around, but I know it's the right thing to do. It is nice to be able to hear from somenone else going through the same. Hope this helped. Charlie22

[DawnW]

I just went to the South African store today. I got some Biltong!

Yes, that is the kind of tea, but the one I actually wanted (by the same company) is called Red Espresso. I looked it up after I posted to you.

The local store doesn't carry it yet but I am hoping I can figure out a way to get some! The stores is called The South African Food Shoppe. It is located on 74/Independance Dr. almost as far South as the 485. I met 3 South Africans there today.

I did not live in Nairobi. We lived up-country, in the tea country area. I went to Boarding School about 30 Kilometers from Nairobi though so I went a lot while at school.

Sad news this week. A gal I went to school with in Kenya has been living in Nairobi with her husband and son, working as Ex-Pats. This week they were car-jacked and she and her son were killed. I hear Nairobi just keeps getting worse and worse with crime. It is so sad to me because we used to walk around at night without any problems.

Where are you from in S. Africa? I stayed in Durban for a holiday of 2 months. We had a great time.

Where did you purchase a home in the Charlotte area?

Dawn

Originally Posted by stmaarten

Dawn,
I saw your PM, but for some reason I'm having some trouble sending one out to you. We don't live in Charlotte yet, we just recently purchased a home there, so I have not been to the SA store. I'd love to know where it is, though. I love REAL Biltong! Is the Red Tea you're referring to anything like Rooibos? Because I have a box that says "Red Tea" right on the cover.
We used to fly up to Nairobi all the time...is that where you lived? What a beautiful country, South Africa is, I miss it terribly.

[Swimmom32]

Ya Think???? Roflmao

Ahh Love Ya Stmaarten

[SurfSwamis]

Originally Posted by stmaarten

Dawn, where in Africa did you grow up? I grew up in a small town in the suburbs of Johannesburg, South Africa. My parents have no problem with us moving...it's my husband's family that's having a bit of an issue....

I too spent my early years in SA (and six years after college). My families house is in CT. I thought I also saw reference to an SA store. In Charlotte? This will give me even more to look forward to getting there. I have one good source for biltong on Wilshire in LA but can get tea, Castle Lager, etc in Laguna Beach. I just made a big babotie for my son and friends last weekend. Is there a SA population in Charlotte?

[DawnW]

Have you been to the SA tea shop on Fairfax? I just moved from LA, but up in the Pasadena area.

Yes, there is a SA population here. There are 2 SA stores, both owned by the same folks. They are very friendly folks. Yesterday I stopped in and got biltong, Digestives and some Top Deck!

Have you found a place to buy Red Espresso? It is by the same company that makes the Red tea.....Roo- something or other.

Dawn

Originally Posted by SurfSwamis

I too spent my early years in SA (and six years after college). My families house is in CT. I thought I also saw reference to an SA store. In Charlotte? This will give me even more to look forward to getting there. I have one good source for biltong on Wilshire in LA but can get tea, Castle Lager, etc in Laguna Beach. I just made a big babotie for my son and friends last weekend. Is there a SA population in Charlotte?

[miklaur]

pj

Thanks for the kinds words and the kick in the rear. It is funny when DH says that same thing I don't want to hear it even though I know it is all true.

My mom and I had a great talk this morning. I think a lot of it now is sadness yet envy because we are doing something they always wanted to and now they can't for a while. My mom's parents are both still living and need help on a weekly basis. My mom is an only child so I have been helping with them as much as possible. In fact, because I stay home with the kids, I have been the one doing all of the things they need. So my mom told me that they will definitely join us south someday and they understand why we can't wait any longer.

I know her opinions/moods will change day to day but we seem to understand each other better for the moment.

Thanks again.
Laurie