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Old 06-12-2008, 07:56 PM
 
Location: Cornelius NC
374 posts, read 1,263,067 times
Reputation: 186

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Quote:
Originally Posted by luisdiovany View Post
Steve I know what you mean...Infact I have a high school buddy that lives in davidson. Ive called him a few times and tried to set up a day for him and his wife to come over so she can meet my wife, but never can say a day and usually doesnt call...I am the type that - Ill call but if i dont get the same respond back I lose interest and move on...thats just me ...I dont chase people...

My wife and I have been going to the Cove Church and I like it alot.
Hey, luisiovany...we go to The Cove Church too. We like it a lot too but we really haven't met anyone there. We just go to worsip. Been there about 2 months now. Have you met people there?
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Old 06-12-2008, 07:59 PM
 
Location: Cornelius NC
374 posts, read 1,263,067 times
Reputation: 186
Quote:
Originally Posted by anifani821 View Post
I am in S. CLT!! I am serious - let's do lunch. Ya'll wanna do a Girls Lunch Out??? I am up for it!!!

You are sooooo right. Women need other women - studies show this is a very real need. We are able to keep a better equilibrium in our lives when we have other female friends. We bolster, we kvetch, we laugh, and we empathize. Plus, women share knowledge, whether it is about raising kids or how to best clean your windows, LOL!!
Anifan, I would love to do a girls lunch. I am way up in Huntersville though. I haven't ventured too far into south Charlotte. The traffic scares me frankly. Can we do it in N. Charlotte...like University City area or some place.
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:11 PM
 
Location: Yellow Brick Road
35,576 posts, read 43,794,221 times
Reputation: 20283
Quote:
Originally Posted by trishlee View Post
Anifan, I would love to do a girls lunch. I am way up in Huntersville though. I haven't ventured too far into south Charlotte. The traffic scares me frankly. Can we do it in N. Charlotte...like University City area or some place.
Maybe we can see who all we can get together for a lunch up your way! Huntersville has some neat restaurants. Wonder who else is up that way? We have posted b/f asking about interest in a GNO for some place North, but I think we only had two or three say they could make it. But I love H'ville myself. Like you, I think we all have gotten where we hate to drive too far. I don't mind the traffic that much but I hate the gas $$$!!!!
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:18 PM
 
Location: Mooresville, NC
79 posts, read 177,670 times
Reputation: 31
I'm fairly new also. I moved to Mooresville in March from Florida and from time to time wonder if it was the right choice (usually after I speak to my niece... she's growing up so fast). I'm in for a lunch meet up but don't really want to go past N. Charlotte- still finding my way around. Let me know if you guys come up with a plan!

mb
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:27 PM
 
Location: Cornelius NC
374 posts, read 1,263,067 times
Reputation: 186
Quote:
Originally Posted by anifani821 View Post
Maybe we can see who all we can get together for a lunch up your way! Huntersville has some neat restaurants. Wonder who else is up that way? We have posted b/f asking about interest in a GNO for some place North, but I think we only had two or three say they could make it. But I love H'ville myself. Like you, I think we all have gotten where we hate to drive too far. I don't mind the traffic that much but I hate the gas $$$!!!!
I am a big baby about driving where I am unfamiliar. I am not used to traffic like the Charlotte traffic so if it can be up here in Huntersville, I will definately be there.
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:29 PM
Status: "60th anniversary of the polio vaccine! Hail to Pitt!" (set 11 days ago)
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
70,058 posts, read 60,642,093 times
Reputation: 20202
Quote:
Originally Posted by eddie1261 View Post
I can respond from PAST moves, and the key is how much you left behind. Older people, meaning people who have seen a lot of family pass away, aren't typically leaving as much behind as younger people. I could move this weekend and not miss a beat, but this where the differences in people comes into it.

.... plus when you move you have a built in excuse to have people visit you.
Two comments: I just don't "get" the first paragraph. First of all, not too many older people move, unless they're moving into a retirement community. People in their 40s and 50s usually only move for job related reasons, as they have kids in high school who don't want to change schools. And they have their own families they are leaving behind, plus all the friends they have made over the years, doing the very things this thread suggests, such as church, volunteering, and so forth.

Secondly, we moved to Colorado and very few people from the east and midwest have ever come to visit us. Mostly just our parents (3 of whom are now gone) and a few friends who were going to CO to ski or on business. We lived here almost 20 yrs before my brother ever came out here. I wouldn't count on it.
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:37 PM
 
Location: Yellow Brick Road
35,576 posts, read 43,794,221 times
Reputation: 20283
Trishlee and Maribee - I am making notes! I know we have more women in your area!!!
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:44 PM
 
307 posts, read 436,356 times
Reputation: 93
Default I am in N CLT

I live in Huntersville too...

I would love to do a lunch or a night out, actually, a night out would be better for me because even though I work from home I have set hours during the day. If you all do arrange something I will see what I can do though.

Now I am not married or a mom, we are on our way to the marriage thing but I still enjoy meeting singles or groups or whatever!
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Old 06-12-2008, 09:11 PM
 
Location: Akron Oh
115 posts, read 270,696 times
Reputation: 58
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiana View Post
Two comments: I just don't "get" the first paragraph.
Well, read the whole post again. It basically says that I believe that the level of homesickness is directly related to what you leave behind. I spoke only from MY point of view. And I will repeat.

"I could move this weekend and not miss a beat, but this where the differences in people comes into it."

I will turn 57 this month. If I move, it will be in conjunction with a job transfer that I will initiate. That is significant only because I don't HAVE to move, I want to. And I am not leaving friends and family behind so I have nobody to miss. The few people I consider to be friends are "remote" friends with whom I stay in touch mainly by email. Again, if you read the whole post, I am a loner and I pretty much go to work, come home, and spend the night either on the computer or reading. And playing with my dog. The reason I would move is that when I DO go out I can see new things, but pretty much I have no life. Sad, but true. Thus I would not be homesick at all.

Your idea of "older" is apparently not the same as mine. I don't mean retirement home aged people. 50 ish people likely have children well out of high school and well into their own lives so the "move away from their friends" is not in my mix. My youngest kid is 30!! My parents are long gone, and I have not spoken to the one sister I have in 6 years. We have never gotten along, and in fact there is a stipulation in my will that my executor must obey stating that should I die before her (she is 5 years older) that she is not permitted to attend any services held for me. Again, I can only speak for myself and my history. Church? Have not been to church in 40 years. Volunteer? Only via cash donations to animal shelters. The point is that (take note here) FOR ME a move would mean nothing because I don't leave anything behind.

Also note that you are speaking as half of a couple (3 of the parents are gone... I only HAD two....) where I am single and it's just me and the cutest dog on earth.

The fact that your brother did not visit for 20 years makes me question the depth of that sibling relationship more than anything. I think I could find a way to buy a plane ticket over the span of 20 years even if I was unemployed and homeless if I really wanted to visit someone.

As far as kids in high school being a deciding factor, the inmates don't run the asylum, do they? The parents move, the kids move. And like it.

So what don't you understand in that post? It was really just the opinion of a guy with one specific set of circumstances that result in a personal perspective of the homesickness question. Your criteria are different, and your opinion will be as well.
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Old 06-12-2008, 09:31 PM
Status: "60th anniversary of the polio vaccine! Hail to Pitt!" (set 11 days ago)
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
70,058 posts, read 60,642,093 times
Reputation: 20202
Quote:
Originally Posted by eddie1261 View Post
Well, read the whole post again. It basically says that I believe that the level of homesickness is directly related to what you leave behind. I spoke only from MY point of view. And I will repeat.

"I could move this weekend and not miss a beat, but this where the differences in people comes into it."

I will turn 57 this month. If I move, it will be in conjunction with a job transfer that I will initiate. That is significant only because I don't HAVE to move, I want to. And I am not leaving friends and family behind so I have nobody to miss. The few people I consider to be friends are "remote" friends with whom I stay in touch mainly by email. Again, if you read the whole post, I am a loner and I pretty much go to work, come home, and spend the night either on the computer or reading. And playing with my dog. The reason I would move is that when I DO go out I can see new things, but pretty much I have no life. Sad, but true. Thus I would not be homesick at all.

Your idea of "older" is apparently not the same as mine. I don't mean retirement home aged people. 50 ish people likely have children well out of high school and well into their own lives so the "move away from their friends" is not in my mix. My youngest kid is 30!!

I am 59 and my youngest is 20. We all have different lives. Some have their kids early, some later.

My parents are long gone, and I have not spoken to the one sister I have in 6 years. We have never gotten along, and in fact there is a stipulation in my will that my executor must obey stating that should I die before her (she is 5 years older) that she is not permitted to attend any services held for me. Again, I can only speak for myself and my history. Church? Have not been to church in 40 years. Volunteer? Only via cash donations to animal shelters. The point is that (take note here) FOR ME a move would mean nothing because I don't leave anything behind.

I was just bringing up some of the suggestions other members of the forum had made as to how to make friends. If you choose to make friends some other way, that's fine by me.

Also note that you are speaking as half of a couple (3 of the parents are gone... I only HAD two....) where I am single and it's just me and the cutest dog on earth.

The fact that your brother did not visit for 20 years makes me question the depth of that sibling relationship more than anything. I think I could find a way to buy a plane ticket over the span of 20 years even if I was unemployed and homeless if I really wanted to visit someone.

You do not know me or him. You are being very presumptuous. I do not have a relationship such as you describe with your sister. I speak with my brother at least monthly. During those twenty years, we saw each other many times at our parents', and at his home, which was not in the same place as my parents'. I do not want to give out a lot of personal history, but believe me, you're barking up the wrong tree with that one.

As far as kids in high school being a deciding factor, the inmates don't run the asylum, do they? The parents move, the kids move. And like it.

Well, I don't know too many parents who don't take the kids into account, at least by the time they are in high school. I don't know why the parents, in their 40s or 50s, would just want to up and move to another state for the heck of it. You should be done 'finding yourself' by that time.
So what don't you understand in that post? It was really just the opinion of a guy with one specific set of circumstances that result in a personal perspective of the homesickness question. Your criteria are different, and your opinion will be as well.
I don't understand saying that older people have lost more people in life, so moving isn't so traumatic to them as it is to someone younger. It seems to me that an older person, say 45 plus, would have more relationships in their present life, than someone say, 25. It also seems to me by the time you start losing many friends, you're at a stage in life where the only place you're moving is the assisted living center.
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