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Thread summary:

Charlotte homesick: traffic accidents, home invasions, different mentality, comfort zones

 
Old 12-01-2008, 10:51 PM
 
Location: NC's southern coastline
452 posts, read 2,127,423 times
Reputation: 351

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I moved just over a year ago and nothing major, just to the NC coast but am SO homesick. Everyone around here finds out I am homesick for --gasp!-- Charlotte and surrounding areas and all say the same thing- How Could You Miss All That Crime?

Well, I was never a victim of any of it...It's not the victim's fault of course but I was always very careful about where and when I went out alone- time of day, location, and if I had to go out at a less preferable time or to an area I was unsure about I just used common sense. I was more worried about staying out of traffic accidents with all the oblivious drivers! And having moved I am more concerned about what I am hearing about all the home invasions.

However I still MISS it SO much you guys!!!!

I miss Uptown....Concord Mills and Harrisburg, Hwy 49 around Central Cabarrus High School area. It's just the little things I miss! I can go to Wilmington for some of the same stores but the stores and restaurants in Concord were better than the ones around here, they had more "stuff"--ie, Target in Concord, seemed to have more "stuff" I like than the Wilmington Target or Myrtle Beach location does, to the point of me not even caring to shop there much. Same for Kohls and some other places.

I miss the Cabarrus County parks, I have REASON to miss the doctors and CMC-Northeast!!!! Won't even elaborate....I actually miss my old 1585 square foot house on a third of an acre lot, when I now have a 3800 square foot house on almost 2 and a half acres, minutes from the beaches (Sunset and Ocean Isle). I am homesick for the Charlotte area. I love the rural parts of Cabarrus County so much! I miss the jobs in Charlotte (from years ago, admittedly!) I miss what I think will be there when everything turns around.

I just think the deomgraphics and people around here are so very different- not bad or "not nice" but the mentality around here is different, people behave differently and value different things. I don't know, you know?

So this is what my husband has to deal with daily: and more .
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Old 12-01-2008, 10:58 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,269 posts, read 88,525,786 times
Reputation: 39860
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueLily7 View Post


I moved just over a year ago and nothing major, just to the NC coast but am SO homesick. Everyone around here finds out I am homesick for --gasp!-- Charlotte and surrounding areas and all say the same thing- How Could You Miss All That Crime?

Well, I was never a victim of any of it...It's not the victim's fault of course but I was always very careful about where and when I went out alone- time of day, location, and if I had to go out at a less preferable time or to an area I was unsure about I just used common sense. I was more worried about staying out of traffic accidents with all the oblivious drivers! And having moved I am more concerned about what I am hearing about all the home invasions.

However I still MISS it SO much you guys!!!!

I miss Uptown....Concord Mills and Harrisburg, Hwy 49 around Central Cabarrus High School area. It's just the little things I miss! I can go to Wilmington for some of the same stores but the stores and restaurants in Concord were better than the ones around here, they had more "stuff"--ie, Target in Concord, seemed to have more "stuff" I like than the Wilmington Target or Myrtle Beach location does, to the point of me not even caring to shop there much. Same for Kohls and some other places.

I miss the Cabarrus County parks, I have REASON to miss the doctors and CMC-Northeast!!!! Won't even elaborate....I actually miss my old 1585 square foot house on a third of an acre lot, when I now have a 3800 square foot house on almost 2 and a half acres, minutes from the beaches (Sunset and Ocean Isle). I am homesick for the Charlotte area. I love the rural parts of Cabarrus County so much! I miss the jobs in Charlotte (from years ago, admittedly!) I miss what I think will be there when everything turns around.

I just think the deomgraphics and people around here are so very different- not bad or "not nice" but the mentality around here is different, people behave differently and value different things. I don't know, you know?

So this is what my husband has to deal with daily: and more .
Awwww....homesickness is tough! I'm sorry you are struggling with this right now It's all about familiarity and our personal comfort zones, you are just out of yours. But this will get better - especially if you try really hard to think of "home" as the place your husband is, not the place your house is

Hang in there!
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Old 12-02-2008, 04:51 AM
 
852 posts, read 2,217,906 times
Reputation: 314
The grass is always greener on the other side. It's so true and if you were to move somewhere else you would miss the place where you live now. I have found over the years that things grow on you fast and you don't even realize it until you don't have them anymore so enjoy and embrace what you have now. It sounds wonderful.
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Old 12-02-2008, 06:56 AM
 
307 posts, read 628,996 times
Reputation: 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by smclarke4 View Post
The grass is always greener on the other side. It's so true and if you were to move somewhere else you would miss the place where you live now. I have found over the years that things grow on you fast and you don't even realize it until you don't have them anymore so enjoy and embrace what you have now. It sounds wonderful.
This is so true, I moved here in April from Northern Va. and I was so homesick most of the summer and fall, I really miss so much there that I took for granted. Now I do love Charlotte, I think it's a gorgeous city and there are tons of things to do here too that I enjoy but it's not home.

Now due to a family circumstance it looks like I may be moving back, and while I am excited to go back (Since I miss it so much and appreciate the area more now) I am also sad to leave this area since there is so much I like here too. I am afraid if I move back I will miss this area as well.
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Old 12-02-2008, 07:03 AM
NCN
 
Location: NC/SC Border Patrol
21,135 posts, read 21,881,518 times
Reputation: 23217
I once had a friend who left the beach and moved back. She and her husband were retired. She said she had done about all the fishing she wanted to do and there wasn't much else to do there. I think I could just go to the beach and watch the ocean roll in. I really prefer living here though. I can be at the beach in a couple of hours on a good driving day and then back home before midnight. The hurricanes usually just dump rain on us and we are on high ground. We can go to the mountains the same way. Not bad to be at a place where the mountains and the beach are just hours away. Sweet Union County!

We do have great medical care here. The Monroe Aquatic Center is reasonably priced and helps us keep fit. Taking care of over an acre helps with the fitness too.

Last edited by NCN; 12-02-2008 at 07:15 AM..
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Old 12-02-2008, 07:31 AM
 
Location: State of Being
35,885 posts, read 67,154,265 times
Reputation: 22373
It is so hard to leave behind things that are our comfort zone and be faced w/ what we feel is a deficit w/ our new situation.

When I moved to KS, I knew that one thing that would help me would be discovering everything I could about the history of the new area I was living in. Since I had spent decades learning about my Southern history (not just my personal family history - the regional history) I decided to start researching the Westward Movement . . . and one of my ancestors had moved to MO . . . so that was a good starting point. It ended up being a pursuit that spanned the entire time I lived there and what was at first more or less "educational" became more a "hobby." And I found I had developed a clearer understanding of what propelled people to move West and how that had changed our whole nation.

So . . . to fill up the down time . . . I would suggest you start researching the Lords Proprietors and how eastern NC was developed. You say the mentality is different there and I SO AGREE!!! I was born near New Bern (long story - won't get into that) but can say my family has close ties to the coastal region so I have spent a lot of time in eastern NC. The history of the region is much more interesting, to me, than living there presently would be, Hee Hee. But as you learn more about things, start going to places like Bath (take pictures - start a blog!!!) . . . and you imagine how people came here on tiny ships that traveled for months . . . and what they overcame when they got here . . . you may find yourself finding interesting things about the region. Create that blog and write it down - what you discover . . . find what the roots of the Old South are there . . . where the money was . . . find the old homesites. Learn about the tobacco industry.

Try to get into a routine. Find a place to park your car and walk on the beach x times every week. Find out what types of beach reclamation is going on - join a wildlife preservation group. Meet more people. Sample all the restaurants. Find out how to make their specialties. Write about that. Share what you discover. Force yourself to do things (not necessarily those I mentioned - that was just what I would do). Start a section on your blog for photography and pick a theme - like - bridges or fishing boats.

I know that may sound lame and yes, it is solitary. But that is how I got through my adjustment to a new area. I "created" a life for myself. I just thought up things and amazingly, I met people along the way . . . and soon I was actually enjoying things I had more or less "assigned" myself to do.

I had to more or less do the same thing when I moved back to NC. I was so attached to KS by then . . . I didn't want to leave! So I had to start over w/ finding things to ground me, to help me find everything good in the area. My trips to Blowing Rock and Boone helped so much, as that is a magical place for me. Maybe the beach can become a magical area for you, too!

Some things, you just have to accept are not in your world right now. There is no way to substitute for those things. You cannot duplicate Concord Mills, hee hee. So instead, you have to find ways to work around that. It isn't easy, but you can do it. Maybe driving to Wilmington on occasion to find cute shops there would add some fun. You are going to have to actively seek out ways to help yourself be more content.

I guess that is what I learned along the way . . . that there are sometimes when we can feel like we don't really have a life! That it has been taken from us. That can happen when we lose a job, lose a loved one we shaped our world around . . . it can happen when we relocate. At those times, I have found that it was solely on my shoulders to create a life for myself. It didn't come to me - I had to go find it . . . outline it, if you will, and then daily, fill in the bits and pieces that make up my life.

Starting over can bring w/ it great sadness as well as great joy! The key is - how to shift from the feelings of loss and sadness to the feelings of discovery and joy! It ain't easy, Lily, so don't get discouraged. Just imagine what you can realistically pursue to fill your life w/ new experiences - and go for it. Some things will turn out to be boring or dead ends - but I promise you - they will lead to new ideas and new pursuits!!!

And keep writing. It helps. Now go research Southport . . . or Beaufort . . . and set up a Blog!!!!!
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Old 12-02-2008, 07:43 AM
 
Location: The Queen City
1,087 posts, read 2,398,421 times
Reputation: 663
Charlotte is a great city, and I would be home sick too. I would miss the lack of traffic, my huge house, the nice people, the weather, easy to get around airport, the choice of shops and restaurants, did I mentioned the people?
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