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Old 11-11-2009, 12:31 PM
 
4 posts, read 6,229 times
Reputation: 10

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I have a 19y old who is completely lost. Out all night, sleeps during day. Lasted in college for about 2 month... His friends are the same type.
Tried everything to get him to stay in college - did not work.
He has been making really bad choices lately that will affect his life long term...
Heartbreaking to see. We tried everything, he is just not listening...
NEED HELP! DOES ANYONE KNOW A GREAT THERAPIST IN CHARLOTTE?
I feel he might need to hear it from someone else...
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Old 11-11-2009, 12:41 PM
 
852 posts, read 2,218,935 times
Reputation: 314
Southeastpsych - they have a website and I believe that Dr Verhaagen is awesome (a few friends are attending there with their kids - 17 and 18). Good luck and you are not alone by the way.
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Old 11-11-2009, 12:43 PM
 
4 posts, read 6,229 times
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Thank you so much! I will check it out...
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Old 11-11-2009, 01:12 PM
 
37 posts, read 57,435 times
Reputation: 17
Is he using drugs?

Perhaps I should say, which drugs do you think/know he is using?
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Old 11-11-2009, 01:36 PM
 
4 posts, read 6,229 times
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Drugs i believe is not an issue here. I know he has used marihuana, but occasionally.
He wanted to be a musician, was a lead singer in a local group (death metal of course). Went on couple of tours.
In the process of it he dropped out of 10th grade. Got his high school diploma online.
I think he is at the point of realization now that his musical career is not happening for him as he hoped for.
I think he is depressed and lost and just don't care about anything else... Doesn't see where he need to go and what we are saying is not registering...
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Old 11-11-2009, 05:57 PM
 
7,109 posts, read 9,743,801 times
Reputation: 2564
Sounds like an overwhelming problem to me and I wouldn't know where to begin to get help. Do you think this is the best site for this type of inquery or have you searched for a more specific web site that might be better able to address your question?

I wish you all the best,
PC
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Old 11-11-2009, 07:58 PM
 
Location: Texas
587 posts, read 1,436,344 times
Reputation: 442
Here is a site that has therapists profiles (self-written), tells a little about them, what kind of clients they see, what insurance they accept, etc. It's a good way to get a little insight into what the therapist may be like. Best of Luck! (And I second smclarke4 - You are certainly not alone!)

http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/
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Old 11-11-2009, 08:33 PM
 
445 posts, read 1,024,484 times
Reputation: 188
I have also heard wonderful things about Dr.Verhaagen.
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Old 11-11-2009, 11:30 PM
 
3,071 posts, read 7,725,129 times
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This is a very common problem .Main thing is for him NOT to get a DUI or any criminal offense or addicted to alcohol or drugs to the point he cant quit on his own. If hes not happy that alone shows he is aware he needs some changes and a plan. If he was really wanting to do music he would stay in the business if not performing. Things like rodies, sound men, transportation etc. Get him to go talk to a gung ho army recruiter . Maybe that would impress him to want to go be what he wants to be.
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Old 11-12-2009, 05:33 PM
 
58 posts, read 107,261 times
Reputation: 71
Default Unmotivated Child

We had a similier problem with our youngest son who is now 22. He freaked out in his senior year, tried to end it all, ended up in intensive care, after that, lock up for suicidal teenagers, he was 17 at the time. He graduated with out any motivation to go to college, but knew he didn't want to make minimum wage his whole life. We took the pressure off of him to enroll in college, told him he should take a "gap" year, BUT he had to work fulltime if he was living at home, which he did.

9 months later he enrolled in a community college where they had a program for kids (mostly young men) that was 12 credits, all the same kids were in the classes so faces became friendly and familier, and the teachers were the same. One of the classes was an intense study for them to determine their talents, it gave them a way to think through their interests and gave them ideas how to find their way.

Our son found a talent in accounting, and went on to get a 2 year degree. He's now thinking of completing 2 more years. All this time he worked for a grocery chain and is now in their financing dept...so there is hope! Good luck!
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