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Slight correction might be in order. I'm thinking more along the lines of...
Cahn' kit.
Well, when I knew I was gonna have problems understanding Bostonians was in 1975 (I remember the event for other reasons) . . . and a newly introduced friend told me that when I visited Boston, I needed to be sure to see the (this is how my ears heard it) Boston Finotz Museum. I was like - HUH? And seeing as how I had just recently received my undergraduate degree (minor in Art) I thought - what the hell? I have never heard of the Finotz Museum - how is that possible? My brain was scrambling so I kept asking questions about the Finotz Museum, trying to come to terms that somehow I had never heard of this amazing museum.
After several minutes, it hit me that my new friend was saying FINE ARTS Museum. It hit me as so funny . . . I nearly spewed my Gin & Tonic, which would have been most embarrassing, as we were at a somewhat formal event . . .
It takes a while for my ears to "attune" to an accent I am not used to. Strangely, after living so long in the Midwest, it took me a while to understand what folks were saying when I moved back to Charlotte. Not all Southerners, of course, b/c there are at least 5 distinct regional accents right here in NC. Some are more difficult to decipher than others.
I rear ended someone. I got out to see if she was ok. She didn't even answer. All she kept saying was "call the police"... "call the police".. I asked if we could just exchange info and go on our ways. I told her I'd happily pay for any damages. Se only says call the police. She never took her hands off the steering wheel, and never would turn and face me. I pulled out my wallet and said can I leave you anything so you know I'll take care of things? She starts rubbing her neck.... "well... I don't feel anything yet.... I pause thinking "o' my lord she's wanting money" So I ask, "you want me to give you money?" ... She looks at my wallet as she's contaminating. I asked, do you even want to see your car? She gets out of her car and looks hard and close for damage. Not even a scratch...... She says "give me your information" So I did. I ask for hers, and she wouldn't give it to me. "Why should I give you mine? You hit me..." I blow it off and ready my self to move along. She follows me around giving obvious glances to my wallet telling me "I don't want any trouble out of you" I know she's wanting me to hand her some money but I play dumb. "no problems out of me, just send me any repair bills and I'll pay the damages" That goes on repeated 2-3 more times. But she never just comes out and says "give me some money" She was just waiting for me to give it to her without looking like would accept a a pay off.
A day later she calls me and says "we found damage after all, there were scuffs and scratches on the bumper the repairs are gonna cost $550" "And I've already been in contact with a police officer friend of mine, I don't want any trouble out of you" I reply, "no trouble at all, send me the repair bill, I'll pay it" She repeats, "I don't want any trouble" so I say again "no trouble, I'll pay it, just send me the bill" I never heard from her again. She had my insurance information, and she worked for an insurance company herself... If there was damage she could have sent the bill or called my insurance company. Never happened...
She was a Southern lady
I'm the Northerner
Scenario 2
Guy rear ends me on the interstate in construction traffic that stopped fast and he was to close.
We both get out, I look at my car, only tow hitch bent. He asks if we need to call the police. I say I think I'm ok and ask if he thinks we need to. He says no. He offers his Insurance info. I say I don't need it unless he wants mine. We both nod our heads, get back in our cars and get back in traffic.
Both Northerners
Scenario 3:
I'm riding with my friend in his brand new truck. A little old lady runs a red light and mashes his rear left side. He was furious. Jumps out of his truck and marches towards the ladies car. She sees him coming and locks her door. He grabs the handle and can't get it open and starts screaming at her through the glass. I had to go pull him away and keep him calm till the police arrived.
He and the old lady were both Southerners
Scenario 4:
I witness an accident between 2 ladies. Lady A hits lady B. Obviously Lady A's fault. Lady A would like to exchange insurance info and move on. Lady B insists the police need to be called. Lady A asks why. Lady B says "I don't know how they do things where you come from, but when we get in accidents around here we call the police" (nasty tone) Lady B says nothing, turns away shaking her head, and flips open her cell phone to make a call while she waits. Gets back in her car.
Lady A was Northerner
Lady B was Southerner
Scenario 5:
I'm pulling up to an intersection around the corner from my house. Traffic stops quick, I stop, guy behind me stops, Lady behind him hits him, knocking him into me. We all get out and exchange info except the lady who won't. Says we stopped to fast, not her fault. The guy says well usually when you hit someone from behind your insurance covers the damage. She carries on, I interupt, I've no damage so I'll head home. I'm right around the corner so if you need me just call. The guy was very reasonable and level headed. He tried not to argue with her but she presses on. I drive away. I get a call about 30 mins later from the guy. Says the officer wants a report from me. So I go back to give it. The lady was doing her best to convince the officer it wasn't her fault. He tells her the insurance companies will handle it from here that all he does is gather info, it's not for him to decide.
Insurance companies, both his and hers call me later as she still won't concede. I give them my view and we get off the phone. I call the guy a few days later and he tells me her insurance company paid for the damages.
I'm the Northerner
Guy was City Southerner (Black Guy, well dressed, nice suit, owned a few franchises including 3 near by McD's, driving a Lincoln SUV)
Lady was Country Southerner (White Lady, driving late 80's - early 90's sadan, faded paint, jeans and a sweat shirt, no makeup, no hair doo, dog and teenage son in the car, no cell phone)
Scenario 6:
I witness Lady A rear end Lady B. Very Minor accident. Lady B want get out of the car or talk to anyone until police arrive. When the police get there she tells them her husband was a lawyer and told her about injuries that don't surface till sometimes days after the accident. She insists her husband comes to get the car and she is taken to the hospital in suspension. Back board, neck brace, the whole bit...
Both Southerners
Scenario 7:
I'm rear ended on independence sitting at the light at village lake drive. The guy gets out and I do as well. I start looking at my car, he's looking at me with this menacing grin on his face. Very odd. I look up at him and turn towards him waiting for an apology or something.. he just stares at me. He was trying to intimidate me. He was a young man around 23 I'd guess. Big guy.. I'm standing there looking at him in disbelief. Is this guy really going to fight me cause he ran into me. Finally I say "not much damage here, but are you at least going to apologize?" The guy says "sorry man" and we both get back into our cars and drive off.
Sunny, they may have seemed that way, but were they really? The reason I am saying this is that I worked around some Northern transplants who acted like they were really on the ball--while the boss was around. When the boss left, watch out. It was party time for them while I did the work. One of them commented to me that it was not what she did that counted, but what the boss thought she did.
I've seen it as well. Northerners outproduce. I've been in Construction/Contracting all of my life. We Hire Northerners with experience on the spot...
I don't know that I'd call Southerners Lazy. There are lazy people everywhere. But less motivated...
Yes, you would probably be shocked that many of my friends are from the North. I still don't like that Northern attitude of superiority and if I witness it too much, that person goes on the avoid list. Sometimes I might be forced to be around these people, but I try my best not to be. It is much easier now that I am retired.
Most of MY Northern friends love it here and think just like I do that they have lucked up and moved to the promised land and would never want to go back to where they were. Intelligent people usually do a better job adjusting than the less intelligent.
And did you know that the more intelligent person speaks in a lower tone of voice. Guess you don't have to yell if you are worth listening to.
...sorry...I was always taught to speak UP.
My parents always told me that it was rude to speak in a lower tone because it would appear as though you had something to hide. If I spoke quietly, I was promptly punished because I was obviously up to no good.
Have to say, the first time I heard "use your inside voice" (at work) I was very confused. I thought that I was......
"Mess we created for ourselves down there." So people coming here just for the money and caring nothing for our culture and throwing up in our face that it is not our town is the mess WE created? I knew from the first that they would be trasping to somewhere else to follow the money and leave us in a mess. No roots, no morals, no sense of values.
I know that not everybody in every part of the country is the same, but we had a very nice state with loving people when all this started. Others saw what we had and wanted it too, but they refused to change to keep it that way. And no Charlotte is not my town and never has been. I am a country girl and luckily I have settled in a place that still has family values, but I cry for some of the things that are going on in Charlotte now.
Here is a small example to help those of you who do not understand the cultural/social differences b/n Northerners and Southerners. This is an actual compilation of my own (and my friends') experiences.
Read these examples and then decide where the women are from - the South or "someplace else."
Two women end up in a car accident. The lady in back obviously caused the accident. After the dust settles, both ladies get out of their cars.
Here are three scenarios.
Lady in back car sighs and reaches for her purse to retrieve her license, insurance card and a piece of paper to write down information on. Before she has it in her hand and can exit her car, Lady from front car is banging on the window. Lady f/ front car says "EXCUSE ME! What the hell is your problem? You have to be effing BLIND! I have called police. Don't even THINK about trying to get out of this." Lady who caused accident doesn't know what to say. She realizes she caused accident but having this crazy banshee screaming at her is very intimidating. No way she is gonna get out of the car and confront this woman.
Who is the Southerner and who is from "somewhere else?"
Scenario Two. Same situation. Lady in back caused accident.
Lady in back is furious. She is late and doesn't need more delay. She isn't sure what to do next. She doesn't want to get a ticket but she guesses police have to be involved. She hears a tap on the window. OMG, it is the slow-ass broad from the car in front of her. She is too angry to even talk. She does not even want to look at the woman, but finally rolls the car window down.
"Are you okay?" the lady from the first car asks. "Do you want me to call the police or are you going to call?" The lady in the car says, "What the hell happened? No, I haven't called the police. I don't know that we even need to. Looks pretty minor from where I am sitting."
Lady from front car is not sure what to do. She guesses she should go ahead and call the police, but in her stomach, she has a knot b/c it appears the lady who caused the accident is not going to take responsibility. She dreads having a hassle over this.
Who is the Southerner and who is from "somewhere else?"
Scenario Three
After the dust settles, the women take their time getting out of their cars. "OMG, I am so sorry," (they both say at the same time).
"Are you okay?" says woman who caused the accident.
"I think it is pretty minor," says woman in front car. "I am fine. Just spilled some coffee."
Woman who caused accident says, "OH NO! I am so sorry. Here, I have some wet wipes in the car." She reaches in car and gets wet wipes. "I have one of those new stain removal pens, too, if you want that.
"I have wondered about those! Yeah, I'll try it." Lady hands her the stain pen.
"This sucks," says woman in back car. "I got distracted. I am so so sorry. My husband is gonna kill me. It is his car."
"Oh, dern. Maybe you don't have to tell him. Just get it fixed. Maybe he won't notice," lady in front car says. They both laugh.
Lady in first car says "Do you want me to call the police? Who knows when they will be here. Were you on the way to an appointment? I think I better call and let my tennis partner know I am gonna be late" Lady from first car dials police and reports accident.
Lady in second car says, "You play tennis? WHere do you play?"
"Over at ABC Club. We meet every Tuesday at 10 am." Lady in first car calls her friend, reaches her and informs of delay.
Lady in second car says, "I play tennis, too, but I am not that good. We play at LMN club. But I don't have a regular partner. And oh my gosh, where are my manners. My name is Gina Smith. Sorry to meet you this way."
"I am Mary Brown. Sorry to meet you this way, too." They both laugh. "Where do you live? I live just a few blocks from here."
"Me, too!" Gina says.
"Well, gosh, we should meet up for tennis," says Mary.
"Sounds good to me," says Gina, who writes down her phone number and hands to Mary.
Police arrive. Ladies go to their cars.
Who is the Southerner and who is from "somewhere else?"
They're both from Denver. Did I win?
There's always a lot of strife when there's a large amount of migration from one area to another. Tens of millions of Southerners poured into Michigan and other Great Lakes States 50 - 60 years ago because there were no jobs in the South, and more work than people to do it in the North. Right now is Charlotte and Atlanta's turn. Don't complain, you'll be missing all those "fohners" when they start leaving for other greener pastures (and/or you run out of water), and your cities and suburbs start emptying out.
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